I have had it in my head for a while now that I wanted some of the homestyle creamy baked mac n’ cheese. Inspiration hit with the snow coming down today, wanting some comfort food, so I just did it. I had been wondering if you could use a box of Kraft as the start to “good” mac & cheese, too. I had some stuff in the ‘fridge & pantry to make it happen. Posting it here to remember what I did.
I didn’t really measure, but this is close…
Ingredients:
2 boxes Kraft mac & cheese (noodles & powder packets)
½ cup butter & ¼ cup butter (for later)
½ cup flour
1 block sharp cheddar cheese (16 oz.?), grated
4 cubed chunks (approx. 1″ cubes) of Velveeta (I used the Aldi version)
1 cup shredded colby jack cheese
2½ cups 2% milk
½ cup half & half
¾ cup panko breadcrumbs
¾ plain breadcrumbs
yellow mustard (a dash)
ground mustard (to taste)
black pepper (to taste)
white pepper (to taste)
salt (to taste)
onion powder (to taste)
garlic powder (to taste)
table blend salt-free seasoning (to taste)
Method:
Preheat the oven to 350° F.
Boil the pasta in some water with bit of salt, for about 5 minutes… the time on the box overcooks them.
Melt ½ cup butter in a cause pan on medium, stir in the flour (season it here), cook 2 or 3 min. until golden.
Slowly stir in milk & half & half. (Season it here too.)
Slowly stir in the grated sharp cheddar & chunks of Velveeta. I put the squirt of mustard in here. (Season it here too.)
Slowly stir in one of the cheese powder packets from the Kraft box. (Season it here too.)
Drain the pasta when it’s done while you’re doing all that, then put it in an 8″x8″ glass baking dish.
Stir in your cheese sauce. (If I understand correctly, that was a roux, then a béchamel, then a mornay… right?) Season it again if you nasty, and you’re reading this, so I know you are.
Melt the ¼ cup of butter in a small bowl with a handle. (Season it here too.)
Stir the breadcrumbs, the other Kraft cheese packet, & the table blend seasoning into the butter bowl.
Sprinkle the shredded colby jack on top of the cheese n’ macaroni.
Spread the buttery cheesy breadcrumbs on that.
Pop it in the oven for like 18 minutes.
Notes:
I popped it in for 20 minutes, and while the breadcrumbs got a little overdone, they weren’t quite burnt. I may cover it in foil for a bit next time, or put the breadcrumbs on after a bit of cooking?
I’ll use a bullion cube in with the macaroni next time. I do that with pasta a lot but was worried the Kraft cheese packets may be salty, they weren’t as bas as I expected.
I needed some grated parmesan shake cheese, but didn’t use any because I couldn’t find it. Ha ha.
What about crushed Cheeze-Its instead of breadcrumbs? What about bacon pieces in there?
Have you done this? Obviously I could just use regular pasta & forgo the Kraft powdered cheese sauce concoction. Got any tips or tricks? If you say nutmeg or cinnamon you can see yourself all the way out.
I did it. No one died. Everyone seemed to like it. I’ll put my recipe down here first & the shenanigans after that… because Threads gave me some shenanigans. Trigger warning for Nonnas worldwide:I put brown sugar in jarred sauce. Proceed with caution.
Preheat oven to 375° (Next time I may do 350° for a longer time, but we were in a but of a hurry.)
Brown the beef in a pan on the stove with some of all your spices to taste. (I could/should have included onion here.)
Mix the ricotta, one bag of the shredded cheese, the grated parmesan, a bit of the shredded parmesan, the eggs, fresh parsley, & shredded zucchini in a large bowl, again with all the spices including the garlic.
This filled two 9×13″ glass baking dishes for me. I think I layered them both a bit different. Follow your heart. Put sauce on the bottom, sprinkle in some brown sugar, the dry lasagna noodles, the ricotta mixture, the ground beef, some more shredded cheese, more sauce, more noodles, and just keep going. I did put a very little bit of water in the jars of sauce to swirl around & empty more.. and put that into the dishes too. Sprinkled cheese and made sure there was lots of sauce on top of each.
Cover them tightly with foil & put them in the oven for 50 minutes.
Take out, sprinkle on some more of the shredded parmesan, cook for another 10 minutes.
Pull out, rest for a bit, then serve.
Notes:
Like I said, lower & slower next time. Maybe 350° for an hour then uncover & go for another 15 minutes?
Carrots may be good in with the ground beef… and/or mushrooms?
Maybe spinach in the cheese mixture or as another layer. Let’s get some fiber up in here.
I don’t generally like sausage, but if you do it’d be good here for sure.
What would you do?
🍝
Readers, let me tell you… people have feelings about calling that strip of pasta a “lasagna noodle.” There is also the fact that “American” lasagna has ricotta, but traditional does not. I was even told that because I added shredded zucchini it is no longer lasagna. I have made it replacing the pasta with long thinly-sliced zucchini planks and still called it lasagna.
People have lost their damn minds. No one knows that food and language evolve over time and across regions and even households?
I did plug my ingredients list into Gemini, ChatGPT, Perplexity, & Copilot to see what they would churn back out, but honestly I didn’t follow through with any of their advice.
I look forward to your thoughts about lasagna, your tips, tricks & recipes, and the nuance of semantics involving pasta naming conventions in the comments. How do you layer yours? I feel like I need a way deeper pan. Do you go “traditional” and eschew ricotta? Do you call lasagna noodles lasagna noodles or are you pretentious?
I really like to make my own meatballs. Sometimes there store bought frozen ones are fine. Sometimes you intend to have a meatball sub, and end up making a meatball club. (I like my meatballs with lasagna & in wedding soup too.)
The other day we needed a quick dinner so frozen meatballs it was. Still gotta make it good though, right? I like a toasted sandwich bun…. with meatball subs, meatball clubs, pulled pork BBQ, chipped ham BBQ, sloppy Joes, & more.
Ooey Gooey Toasty Meatball Sub
I had ChatGPT help me format my recipe from my ramblings…
Cheesy Meatball Subs with Garlic-Herb Toasted Buns Servings: 2 | Prep: 10 min | Cook: 15–20 min
Ingredients:
8 frozen meatballs
2 sub rolls
2–3 tbsp butter, melted
½ tsp garlic powder
½ tsp onion powder
½ tsp Italian seasoning
1 tsp parsley
1 cup jarred marinara sauce
1 tsp brown sugar (optional)
2 tbsp grated Parmesan or Romano cheese (plus extra for topping)
Black pepper, to taste
4–6 sliced black olives (plus extra for topping)
2 slices provolone cheese
¼ cup shredded mozzarella
Instructions:
Cook the meatballs according to package instructions.
Preheat oven to 357°F (180°C). Mix melted butter with garlic powder, onion powder, Italian seasoning, and parsley. Slice rolls and brush the butter mixture onto the cut sides. Sprinkle with Parmesan/Romano and some sliced black olives. Toast for 5 minutes.
Warm marinara in a small saucepan over medium heat. Stir in brown sugar, Parmesan/Romano, Italian seasoning, and black pepper. Taste and adjust seasoning.
Place 4 meatballs per bun. Spoon sauce over the meatballs. Add additional olives, provolone slice, and shredded mozzarella.
Return assembled subs to the oven for 5 minutes until cheese is melted and bubbly.
Let cool slightly, then serve and enjoy!
Apparently canned black olives are polarizing here according to social media. Would roasted red peppers be acceptable? What about sauteed green peppers or onions? Mushrooms?
What do you do to spice up your quick go-to meals? What do you like on your subs? Yes, I put sugar in jarred marinara sauce. Tell your Nonna to calm down with the carrots and the baking soda. I like the sweetness and the acidity cut. I also use jarred minced garlic occasionally.
Quick Edit to add, had these for lunch today with the leftovers:
Like everyone who has a vegetable garden, or even just one potted plant, we have an abundance of zucchini. I was asking AI language models for casserole cooking times & temperatures based on what I had around & could easily grab from the store, and I sort of picked a hybrid of all of them. I used ChatGPT, Gemini, Perplexity, & CoPilot. Originally I had been asking about zucchini bread recipes, then asked about the casserole. It is interesting to bounce ideas off of them.
“Zucchini!” (But, say it like a Jawa yelling “Utini!” in Star Wars.)
I had the idea for the lil’ zucchini things last time I made breaded zucchini & ran out of breadcrumbs before zucchini.
Zucchini Ditalini Chickpea Chikini
I hesitate to call this a casserole, because the kids are on a brainrot social media kick where they have been informed somehow that Crock⬩Pot meals & casseroles are bad. The best part is they both ate & loved it… one even went back for more. It was a hit with the wife too, and I’d eat it again.
Zucchini Ditalini Chickpea Chikini
I felt like making a casserole, but not making a mess by pre-cooking/par-cooking or measuring anything. So… I ended up making two 9″x13″ casseroles. Here it is to the best of my memory.
2 (8 oz.) blocks of cream cheese, softened (Leave it out for a bit, nuke it, or cradle it in your armpits.)
1 (2 cup)bag of shredded white cheddar cheese
1 (2 cup) bag of Havarti cheese
1 (1½ cup) bag of Gouda cheese (Same damn size bag – thanks, shrinkflation!)
1 (32 oz./4 cups) box of chicken stock
1 stick (4 oz./½ cup) butter.
Breadcrumbs – Maybe 3 cups?
2 Tbsp. minced garlic from a jar because elicits unwarranted hate.
Seasonings to taste – I used Rotisserie Chicken seasoning, Mrs. Dash’s Table Blend, Black Pepper, White Pepper, Onion Powder, Garlic Powder, Paprika, & dried parsley. Ain’t nobody measuring all that.
I was going to include some “bacon pieces,” but I must have left them in the store, or they fell out in the car, or I put them in a weird place or threw them out, because they absolutely are in what may as well be a pocket dimension.
The Method:
Pre-heat the oven to 375°
Grease apparently two 9″x13″ glass baking dishes with a stick of butter.
Get two mixing bowls. In one, whisk the egg, then fold in the cream cheese, the chicken stock, the garlic, the (drained) chickpeas, about half of each of the shredded cheeses, the dry Ditalini, and spices in one mixing bowl.
Slice up the bell pepper, onion, zucchini, & chicken in consistently sized cubes. (If you left the zucchini in the garden too long like I did, cut out the spongy center.) Put all that in the other mixing bowl, toss it with some more of all the spices.
Mix the contents of the two bowls together as you string together new swear words and wish you have an even more ridiculously larger mixing bowl.
Put those into the baking dishes. Or one big one, or a casserole dish, or whatever you’ve got. Cover with foil, place in oven, & bake for 45 min.
Melt the remainder of the stick of butter in a microwave safe bowl. Or a microwave unsafe bowl if you’re an agent of chaos. Dump in some breadcrumbs and toss them in the butter, so the breadcrumbs are coated but not all gross. I used a mix of panko & regular. I did not measure.
Pull from the oven, but leave it on, remove foil.
Spread the remaining shredded cheese on the top of the casseroles, then the buttery breadcrumbs… and put it back in the oven. I swapped it to 350° on a convection setting at this point for 15 minutes… but you do you.
Notes:
YOU DO NOT NEED TO PRE-COOK THE CHICKEN, PASTA, OR VEGETABLES. You certainly can, and it may deepen the flavors and reduce baking time, but I wanted to do this all in one go. I checked the chicken in a few sports with an instant-read and it was a bit over the USDA recommended 165°.
I was going to mix the cheeses together at the end, but why dirty another bowl? I dumped them on almost somewhat evenly.
Obviously, cut out what you don’t like, add what you do, skip stuff, or add stuff.
I may try this again with bacon or ham… but there was a good bit of salt in all the cheeses already, and probably the chickpeas.
I may try this with shredded zucchini and maybe leaving the chicken breast cutlets whole on top. Maybe.
Ricotta instead of cream cheese may be good too.
Use chicken broth, bone broth, vegetable broth, milk, water, or whatever… just give the pasta enough liquid to absorb.
Pizzucchini Teeny Mini
Again, this was a quick idea I had last tame I made air-fried breaded zucchini and ran out of bread crumbs because the zucchini multiplies as I sliced it. I did it in the oven quick after I yanked out the “let’s not call this casserole a casserole.”
Pizzuchini Teeny Mini
Ingredients:
1 normal-sized zucchini.
1 (2 cup) bag of “pizza cheese”
1 (15 oz.) squeeze bottle of pizza sauce
a bit of EVOO
Maybe ½ cup of breadcrumbs
The Method:
Do you really need instructions here? I put the oven on 400° on the air-fryer setting. I didn’t pre-heat it because it was already running.
I sliced the zucchini about ¼-inch thick, and put it on the baking sheet over a bit of EVOO.
I dropped on some sauce, some cheese, and a tiny bit of breadcrumbs.
I put it the oven for 15 minutes.
Notes:
What the hell is “pizza cheese?” It said that on the bag. I guess mozzarella & provolone? Please tell me in the comments that it is all plastic & slowly killing me. Maybe I should have read the bag.
I will probably skip the EVOO or get a cooking rack for the air fryer setting.
~🧀~
OK, so that’s it. Hit me up with suggestions, questions, love, or hate in the comments! Share your zucchini recipes, too!
So, I have always wanted to make wedding soup, but have never tried it. Until now. Skip to the end if you just want the recipe and none of my shenanigans.
Wedding Soup à la AiXeLsyD13
Wedding soup recipes abound on the internet. Some people are vehement that theirs is the “right” way. Apparently the inclusion of pasta is a beans-in-chili-like debate. I would guess that it depends on your region, heritage, and family traditions. I have none of these ties. I’m just a yinzer that likes food. I did reach out via Facebook to see how others do it. I wanted to try to make the soup because of the tiny pasta, I think. I may have also made some other “controversial” decisions.
Pasta. Even though real Italians apparently don’t include pasta in their soup, I am not Italian. Not remotely, even. Seriously. My wife got me the DNA thing for my birthday a few years back and I’m apparently super English, Scottish, Welsh, & Irish with a bit of Scandinavia and the Iberian Peninsula thrown in. I had to Google the Iberian Peninsula. So, as a Yinzer I am making a stand with pasta in the wedding soup because that’s how I have seen it. Orzo looked too much like rice,and rice in soup is gross. (I know, it is an entirely different consistency. Just accept the fact that rice in soup is gross, you’re wrong if you disagree, and read on.) I did most of my shopping at Aldi, but they had no tiny pasta… so I went to Giant Eagle and got Acini De Pepe. I could have also easily gone with what Barilla calls Pastina (neat tiny stars!) and apparently is not even a thing or it’s a generic thing.
If I would sub out cheese tortellini/farfalle for pastini/acini de pepe in the wedding soup, I could get all my ingredients at @AldiUSA. #fb
I chose to make the meatballs myself, because I like making meatballs. They’re big-ass meatballs because I have poor portion control and couldn’t use the mellon-baller to effectively help reel it in, and who wants a little tiny meatball anyway? I used beef, because cows are tasty. I typically don’t do the lamb/veal/pork mix in any meatballs or meatloaf, so why start now? I also opted for ground beef in lieu of chicken or turkey, because beef. Sheep are for making blankets, not eating… unless you like eating meat that tastes like wool blankets.
In my meatballs, I use Kraft Roasted Red Pepper Italian dressing & crushed seasoned croutons. I also tossed in some extra spices (onion & garlic powder, salt, pepper, and whatever “Italian Seasoning” is), two eggs, and parmesan/romano “shake cheese.” (Does anyone else call it that?) I generally crush the croutons with my hands, but since I was apathetically trying to make smaller meatballs and my 3yo was my helper, I put some in a sandwich baggie and smashed to crap out of them with the shake-cheese bottle. Why use bread crumbs when you can smash stuff? I could totally skip the dressing & toss in whatever spices… but I tried this one time with meatballs to go with spaghetti or lasagna and we liked it, so it stuck. We cooked them in 2 frying pans, because it seemed quick. I like to bake meatballs sometimes too. This really could be a 7-day damn project of soup.
A lot of wedding soup recipes call for shredded chicken. I never really noticed it in the wedding soups I had eaten until at a recent wedding where they left the chicken in sizable chunks. Maybe it was an accident? I have no idea, but I liked it. I felt like I was taking a bite of something instead of creepy little chicken strings being used as a garnish. Also, I decided to cheat and not make stock… or I probably would have roasted then boiled the shit out of a chicken carcass and produced some shredded chicken as well as tasty stock. I grilled the chicken in the manliest way possible outdoors over an open flame like our cavemen ancestors. OK, I cooked it on a counter-top panini grill and attempted to give it some nice criss-crossed grill lines before letting it cool and cutting it into “cubes” with less knife skills than Stevie Wonder. I wanted to know I was eating chicken. I probably put some season salt on it.
I made a mirepoix, I think. I put some butter in the bottom of the soup pot, and heated up some finely chopped carrots, celery (stalks and some of the leafy top), onion, & a bit of parsley and the lazy-people chopped-up-already in a jar garlic. Did those last two mess up the mirepoix? Salt and pepper went in there too, because the Food Network says to season every step or something like that.
Then I added some random boxes of stock & broth from Aldi. Really. I couldn’t decide. So, I got lowfat (that’s all they had) chicken stock, chicken broth, and low sodium chicken broth. They were all those creepy giant juice-boxish containers that no doubt every chicken aspires to reside in someday. I almost bought a vegetable stock, but didn’t. How do you get vegetable stock anyway? Isn’t that just broth? Isn’t the difference between stock & broth the inclusion of bones?
After that, I added the meatballs and chicken and let it boil for a bit. Maybe on like 7 or 8? I hate when recipes say “medium-high” heat. Give me a number, damnit. There are numbers on my oven. Are they there for no reason? How long? I don’t know. Long enough to chop up the “fresh” spinach.
I went for the fresh spinach in a plastic box at Aldi. I didn’t see any with the produce, didn’t catch it in frozen, and bought a can as backup just in case. They didn’t have any endive or escarole that I noticed. I wasn’t sure about Kale but may try that next time. I probably could have added the canned spinach too… it could have used a bit more maybe? Although, my meatball helper who crushed about 4 or 5 meatballs after we cooked them wasn’t a big fan of the soup itself because “big kids don’t like spinach sometimes.” She will eat pasta, grilled chicken, carrots, and meatballs all day every day. But the spinach was a no-go I guess. I think I added about 4 cups of water and 2 chicken bullion cubes in there somewhere.
I added the spinach and the box of acini de pepe at the same time. I let it go for the recommended 9 minutes. I know I had been advised to not do it that way. Cooking the pasta separately first then adding the rest of the soup over it in a bowl would be the level-headed thing to do. I was ready to eat by that point though, so in it went.
It was delicious on the first run if I do say so myself. Upon having leftovers, the acini de pepe swelled to ridiculous proportions. Ha ha. Next time I will cook the pasta first or only use half of a box. Or, I will do it the same way and have wedding pasta. Your soup means nothing to me! My total meat and carb domination can not be culled.
Well, on to the recipe if you even made it this far:
Non-Italian Wedding Soup Recipe:
This is not your ordinary recipe. I don’t measure much. I just throw stuff into a pot, especially with meatballs and soup. Obviously, use whatever you have on hand. Make substitutions. This is a recipe in the loosest sense of the word. This is how I did it this time. I may do it different next time. There probably are some good details above that I neglected to mention down here.
The Meatballs:
3 lb. Ground beef (I think it was 80/20?)
Seasoned Croutons (grab your favorite)
Kraft Roasted Red Pepper Italian dressing
Seasonings
2 eggs, beaten.
Parmesan/Romano “shake cheese”
One day when making meatballs, I grabbed the dressing & croutons because they were on the counter. We were probably having salad with our spaghetti or lasagna. It’s just breadcrumbs & oil with some seasonings in it. I usually smash the croutons by hand, but crushed some of these with a plastic sandwich bag & the Parmesan cheese container since I was trying to make smaller(ish) meatballs. I added some more spices (see below) with the beaten egg, and mixed the meatballs by hand. I used a fancy mellon-baller with an ice-cream-scoop like trigger mechanism that my mom had given me for a few of them, to measure… but they got out of hand easily and I had my 3yo helping. So, they were probably bigger than they needed to be. How much dressing and croutons? Eye it. I do. I like meatballs that are mostly meat, not bread.
The Soup:
A few handsful of Carrots (I started with the baby-cut ones because the kids snack on them.)
Maybe ⅓ of a bunch Celery? (I chopped up the stalks & some leaves.)
An Onion
Fresh Parsley
Spinach – I got a box of the “fresh” stuff from Aldi.
Grilled & poorly diced Chicken Breasts (I did mine on the panini grill)
Home-Made Meatballs (…or use frozen ones from the store.)
3 creepy juice-box-like broth/stock containers. I literally got 3 different kinds of chicken broth.
4-sh cups water
2 chicken bullion cubes
Minced garlic in Olive Oil (because I’m lazy & don’t want to mince my own.)
Butter (enough to cover the bottom of your soup pot when it melts)
Parmesan/Romano “shake cheese”
Shredded Parmesan (Aldi had a fancy little container.)
De Cecco Acini De Pepe
I started out with the butter melting on the bottom of the soup pot, then added the carrots, celery, onion, & some parsley. I sauteed that for a bit, then dumped in the 3 weird juice boxes of chicken broth/stock over top of that and brought it to a boil. I reduced the heat a bit, and added the chicken and meatballs. I let it get back to a boil and added some of the shredded Parmesan & Parmesan/Romano shake cheese to the broth. I let that simmer for a bit and eventually added -ish more cups of water and 2 chicken bullion cubes. (Maybe beef bullion would have been cool here?) Once that boiled again, I added the pasta & spinach & boiled for another 9 minutes. It was tasty. I burned my tongue. Let it cool. Be patient.
Spices…
Season All
Paprika
Onion Powder
Garlic Powder
Crushed Black Pepper
Sea salt
White Pepper
Crushed Red Pepper
Italian Seasoning
Parsley Flakes
When I refer to seasonings or spices, it could have been any combination of these. I just grab & shake whenever.
Please, let me know if you tried your own inspired by this one. Let me know if you do your own a totally different way. Let me know what I did right, or let me know what I did “wrong.” Thanks for reading!
…And, that’s what brings us here. I have no idea if this is another response from their webform, or me using my W(aL)D Twitter account to contact the Pizza Hut and Yum! Brands Twitter accounts to try and get some answers.
from Williams, Corey to “world.and.lunar.domination@gmail.com” date Wed, Feb 17, 2010 at 3:00 PM subject Pizza Hut Customer Service mailed-by yum.com
Mr. Aixelsyd-
I understand you have some questions related to our Allergens and Sensitivities Guide as posted on www.pizzahut.com. I would very much like to speak with you on the telephone to explore this topic further. Please provide a telephone number where I may reach you. If you have a preferred time that is most convenient please indicate that also.
Thank you and I look forward to speaking with you.
Corey Williams
Customer Service
Pizza Hut
And, this is my reply…
from ERiC AiXeLsyD to “Williams, Corey” date Wed, Feb 17, 2010 at 3:19 PM subject Re: Pizza Hut Customer Service mailed-by gmail.com
Hello Mr. Williams,
Thank you for your attention to my inquiries! I have an ever-changing schedule, and I’m not really available by phone for any given length of time. I hope you are able to provide clarification via email.
Previously, I was contacted (through use of the webform) on two separate occasions by Dave Kronenwetter (Area Coach) and Ed Holt (Region Coach) with the same exact text copied & pasted into their reply. My questions are now in response to that reply. Here is the original message from Mr. Kronenwetter (the first to reply with this message):
Here is my response, full of questions of safety and cross-contamination all-around.
[Click here to read my reply to Mr. Kronenwetter’s original response.]
I’m excited by your reaching out to me to address these concerns. I can’t wait to read your reply, and to hopefully have some insight on these serious allergy issues.
-Eric
It’ll be interesting to see what kind of response I get, if any.
If you’ve ever heard me on the subject of Pizza Hut, it all boils down to this… Pizza Hut = Gastrointestinal Distress. I have no idea why. I’ve heard the same thing from many other people when the subject is raised. I know I’ve gotten into it on facebook not too long ago too. I enjoy plenty of other pizzas from other chains & from the local shops, all with no digestional discomfort.
Contrary to the belief held by your delicious pizzas, my intestines are not a waterslide. Can you please instruct the to not use my digestive system as a waterslide park? It would be very much appreciated!
Well, their answers back then were quite dissatisfying, and when I contacted them again via snail mail, my query went wholly unanswered.
Perhaps that’s why I waged another campaign of emails with a vengeance. I looked up several Pizza Hut and Yum! Brands executives online, found the syntaxt of their respective companies’ email addresses, and fired off a few notes… as well as filled out the webform once or twice or so.
from ERiC AiXeLsyD world.and.lunar.domination@gmail.com to Scott.Bergren@yum.com date Wed, Jan 20, 2010 at 8:28 AM subject Intestinal Warfare? mailed-by gmail.com
Hello,
This isn’t about a specific incident, but a general observation. There was nowhere in the webform to indicate that, so I had to seek out some email addresses. I find it quite rude that there’s no general inquiry area, or a contact email address.
As for the purpose of my missive…
I would like to know why your pizza treats my intestines like a water park. Every time I enjoy your delicious slices of pie, I feel like I have swallowed a hurricane that’s trying to escape via my …well, I’ll leave that to your imagination.
I can assure you that I’m not lactose intolerant, but perhaps I’m allergic to something in your sauce or pie? I don’t seem to have this problem with any other pizza places… chains or local.
Have any other customers written to you regarding gastrointestinal distress of any sort? My cousin who works in a Pizza Hut in Ohio swears that they use a different sauce there, devoid of the same effects.
Thanks for your time!
-ERiC
The email address experiment seemed to be to no avail. I’ve either been blocked by IT, spam filters, or wholly ignored. But, it looks like I did get a bite off of the webform…
from Dave Kronenwetter Davekronenwetter@aurorahuts.com to world.and.lunar.domination@gmail.com cc Ed Holt edholt@aurorahuts.com date Thu, Jan 21, 2010 at 9:16 AM subject Pizza Hut Incident Eric Aixelsyd mailed-by aurorahuts.com
Dear Mr. Aixelsyd,
I was sorry to hear about your experience at the local Pizza Hut. Let me assure you that the ingredients used here in Pennsylvania are the same quality ingredients that are used throughout the country. In most cases our ingredients come from the same suppliers. The following website lists possible allergen & sensitive ingredients : http://www.pizzahut.com/Files/pdf/Updated%20PH%20Allergen%20List%2004.17.09.pdf This website includes our nutritional information: http://www.pizzahut.com/Files/PDF/Pizza%20Hut%20Nutrition%20Info%2010.12.09.pdf. Please feel free to contact me with any additional questions you may have and I will handle them personally
Sincerely,
Dave Kronenwetter
Area Coach
Aurora Huts LLC
412-897-6775
davekronenwetter@aurorahuts.com
Interesting. Well, at least now I have two good contacts… but perhaps my query will take a more serous and inquisitive turn.
Upon viewing the interesting pdf linked to by Mr. Kronenwetter, I see that a bunch of items there are marked “prepared in common equipment and therefore may contain allergens” in the shellfish column. I’m not sure exactly why this is, because I don’t recall any shellfish on the Pizza Hut menu, and especially since the items marked are oddly random and specific… Garlic Parmesan wings, and no others… three different pizza sauces… 3 of the 4 Tuscani pastas, and breadsticks.
I can only assume that these things arrive at Pizza Hut pre-made, and may come into contact with potential allergens at the manufacturing/processing/packaging facility? Oh well, perhaps I can figure out a way to address this in a goofy manner, yet still yield some positive and enlightening results. I know that many people suffer from the pizza hut digestion demon, and I really hope it’s not just some sanitary/kitchen issues.
Perhaps this too must move into snail mail territory. For some reason, most companies seem to treat a real live letter with more respect than an email.
I thought of Yum! Brands today as we watched Spaceballs… In the characters Kernel Sandurz and Pizza the Hutt – both now Yum! Brands brands. Would it be wrong of me to write to them and tell them that Mel Brooks is working on a new special edition of Spaceballs with more scenes, digitally inserted characters and creatures, and better re-vamped special effects… and that they’d like to include more Yum! Brands characters… like Captain Long John Silver and Taco Bell, and some droid sidekicks, A & W?
World (and Lunar) Domination 