Tag Archives: cell phone

The dreaded ‘individual Chicken Cæsar Salad Individual wrap’ scam…

Posted on by Standard 12

Chicken Caesar wrap

Image by Tim Rodenberg via Flickr

At first, I thought this was someone mistaking me for McDonald’s (or another food place) again, then I thought it’s most likely spam.  At any rate, I’m having some fun at some scammer’s expense.  I don’t think English is their first language…

From: john simson <jsimson02983@gmail.com>
Date: Thu, Nov 17, 2011
Subject: Attn-My Mom Birthday Party (Chicken Caesar Salad)
To:

Hello My name is John Simson and I would like to order for individual Chicken Caesar Salad Individual wrap in your restaurant for 150 people on 29th November and pick up time is 3pm and it’s for my Mom’s Birthday Party and it will be picked up by my courier agent and I am ready to pay the full payment with my credit card so get to me with the following information below…… 

Pickup Address: 
Personal cell #: 
Total cost for the food: 
Type of credit card: 


Best Regards, 
John Simson

Always eager to help, I wrote back.

From: Waldo Lunar <world.and.lunar.domination@gmail.com>
Date: Thu, Nov 17, 2011
Subject: Re: Attn-My Mom Birthday Party (Chicken Caesar Salad)
To: john simson

Hello Mr. Simson,

It would be my pleasure to prepare your “individual Chicken Cæsar Salad Individual wrap” order for 150 people!  Can I ask where you found my company’s contact information?  We believe in strong kick-backs & discounts for referrals!

Would you like 150 wraps, or 200 or so …in case people want seconds?  I’m somewhat unclear on your wording… perhaps you would like one giant individual chicken cæsar salad wrap that can feed 150 people?

Your mom is a lucky lady!  To not only know 150 people, but to have a son like you that’s putting together such a grand event (with super-fine dining to boot) is an incredible thing.  Perhaps you can up your count to 151 and I’ll hand deliver?  I don’t have many friends, but I do like parties!

Would you like to stamp your mother’s name along with a happy birthday message on the outside of the wrap(s)?  Advertising with printing directly on the wraps is standard for us, so it’s no big deal & not much of an extra charge for us to add a custom message.  We feel that we must seize every opportunity to advertise.

Currently we’re working on exciting “edible” advertisements that will pass through your system and remind you of our catering services upon their exit.  They always come out (well, usually always), but they’re not always readable.  We need to work on a smooth non-stick or oily surface that always floats.  We hope to be a leader in defecation-marketing!

I don’t have a personal cell phone, as I mentioned before… I don’t have many friends.  I would prefer cash since I can deliver in person.  Then you won’t need to worry about my address… and I’m not sure why you’re asking for a type of credit card when you’re the one paying me.

I can get back to you with the total cost once you tell me if you desire the custom birthday message, how many wraps exactly, and if you’ll need any side orders.  May I reccomend the potato chips?  They’re homemade, and each one is designed like a tasty business card!  Also, I have a discount for friends, pending the party invitation.  Maybe your courier agent and I can hang out?  I like bicycles.

Looking forward to your business!
-Waldo Lunar

Reasonable enough questions, right?

From: John Simson <jsimson01@yahoo.com>
Date: Thu, Nov 17, 2011
Subject: Re: Attn-My Mom Birthday Party (Chicken Caesar Salad)
To: Waldo Lunar <world.and.lunar.domination@gmail.com>

Thanks for the email,I want you to understand that am hearing impaired so the best way for me to communicate with you is via email and i can only make payment via my credit card.Thanks

WHAT?  Heh.  Sorry, that was tasteless.  I still don’t know how they’re going to scam me by providing their credit card information.  I don’t want to be baited into taking it either.

From: Waldo Lunar <world.and.lunar.domination@gmail.com>
Date: Thu, Nov 17, 2011
Subject: Re: Attn-My Mom Birthday Party (Chicken Caesar Salad)
To: John Simson <jsimson01@yahoo.com>

Thanks again Mr. Simson,

We can do that then, no problem.  I abhor the phone.  See?  We’re already forming the bonds of friendship!  How is your mother?  I hope she is well.  Sorry it took so long for me to reply, I’m up to my eyeballs in turkey dinner preparation.  I think there must be a holiday next week, we’ve had a big rush for individual turkey wraps.

I am uncomfortable taking credit information via email.  Any type of card is acceptable.  Would you be able to pay upon pickup or delivery?  I can perhaps get one of those gadgets that connects to my work cell phone and swipes credit cards.  I hear that Nigerian scams abound out there on the internet… people phishing for personal details, and what-not.  They are indeed the scourge of the modern age, my friend.  They prey upon the naive, and the kind-hearted like you and me.

May I ask, why you were inquiring about a type of card if you’re the one paying… and why about a personal cell phone if you’re hearing impaired?  Is it to text?  Have you looked into a TDD system?

Also, as far as the pickup address, which location would you prefer for a pickup?

If you could please answer the questions from my last email, it would help move things along.  I also forgot to ask (silly me!) what the date of the party is?

I’m thinking cost-wise, we’ll be anywhere from $7 to $14 per person, depending on side options, possible drinks, portion sizes, and pending the custom matronly birthday wishes.  I realize that it’s a steep price, but my individual chicken Cæsar wraps are the best in the tri-state area.  “For real, son.”  …as they said in the streets a few years ago.  I joke, because I feel we will be great friends, John.

As soon as you answer all my questions, we’ll be good to go!  What kind of dress is the party?  I don’t want to show up in my tux if we’re all supposed to be in jeans!  Or is there a theme?  I went to a party one time where we all wore Hawaiian shirts.  It was very exotic!  Maybe with a chicken Cæsar theme, we could do a toga party?  Or, if everyone wore flowered sheets, a Hawaiian toga party?  Rome meets Maui!  I could put pineapple rings on the wraps to decorate.  I was also thinking if you’d like to attach a photo of your mother, we could also perhaps print that on the individual wraps?  Do you have a ukulele?  Maybe we can look up some Roman songs.

Please, respond at your earliest convenience my friend!  You should practice this to impress your mother: “Donec mater grata luau in honore tuo! Sit amicus recens Waldo.”  Google Translate is quite fun!

Malama pono salutem plurimam,
-Waldo

Your move, “Mr. Simson”!

Wraps

Image by Joe Shlabotnik via Flickr

And really though…  Toga Luau?  How awesome would that be?  And the advertisements in poop?  It’s coming.  Right after they start printing on the wraps themselves.  Why advertise on just the paper wrapper itself?

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Cellular Menaces (via 3kalb)

Posted on by Standard Reply

Here I’ll link you to a great post by 3kalb.  I hate cell phones in public places.  It’s annoying, it’s rude, it’s ridiculous.

Do you not realize that the others around you are annoyed by hearing half of your conversation?  Do you not care that you’re holding up the line?  Do you not care that you’re broadcasting intimate details of grandpa’s prostate operation to everyone?  Do you not care that you’re talking at 3x your normal volume level?

Of course not.

By the title, I hope that– *ring ring ring* Oh I’m sorry, I forgot I was talking, my phone went off and I just had to take it. Let me finish my opening statement. I hope that it is obvious where I am going with this pet peeve. Simply put, cell phones are a major nuisance and addiction that cannot be stopped! Where do I see cell phones? In schools. In offices. In cars. In malls. In fastfood establishments. In restaurants. On the streets. On the b … Read More

via 3kalb

PUT. IT. DOWN.

PUT. IT. DOWN.

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Dunkin’ Donuts on Allergy Signage… [Case# 7577485]

Posted on by Standard 1

Did you see my allergen warning sign photos from Dunkin’ Donuts and Giant Eagle?  I wrote to both of them to thank them for displaying the signs.  Giant Eagle was the first to reply, and now I’ve heard from Dunkin’ Donuts.  I submitted the following via webform:

Hello,

I was in the Dunkin’ Donuts in Dormont this weekend, and I was pleasantly surprised to see this allergen warning sign:  http://i127.photobucket.com/albums/p139/worldandlunardomination/Signs/p_00527.jpg

As someone who has a severe allergy, I found this to be a responsible and proactive decision on the part of Dunkin’ Donuts, and I just wanted you to know that it’s an appreciated gesture.

Thankfully, my allergy isn’t to peanuts, or I’d most likely go nowhere near your fine establishments, much like I currently avoid Red Lobster and Long John Silver’s due to my shellfish allergy.

I did, as the sign suggested, go to https://www.dunkindonuts.com/aboutus/nutrition/ in order to see allergen information for some of my favorite menu items.

I also see that you have a blanket *.pdf available showing nutrition information for all of your products.  Do you have something like this for allergens in all of your products?

It’s a red flag for me that you have “Crustaceans” on the list, and even expand upon it under the data table with “Crustaceans include, crab, crayfish, lobster, and shrimp.”

Do any of these creepy little sea-bugs show up in any of your products?  My curiosity is piqued, my friends!

Thank you for your time, and for responsibly posting allergen warnings.  I look forward to hearing from you!

Not dead yet,
-Eric

Ant they wrote back…

From: “customerservicereply@dunkinbrands.com” <customerservicereply@dunkinbrands.com>
To: me@my.email.address
Sent: Tue, October 12, 2010
Subject: Case# 7577485 – Dunkin’ Donuts

Hi Eric,
Thank you for taking the time to contact Dunkin’ Donuts.
To answer your questions regarding allergens, the stores should have a printed document available behind the counter that will tell you if any of the allergens required to be listed by the FDA are in our products.
If you call our Consumer Care line, they can tell you as well.
As far as the shell fish listing on our forms, that form is required by the FDA. We have to show it on the form but you won’t see it checked off for any of our products.
I hope this answered your questions.
You can reach us at 800-859-5339 M-F 8:30AM to 5:00PM EST.
At Dunkin’ Donuts we value our customers and are committed to making your visits to our stores a pleasant experience.

Thank you and have a great day.

Louise
Customer Relations Associate

Reference # 7577485

It’s interesting how people intemperate the laws… I certainly don’t see standardized allergen information on all food-related websites. I’m glad that companies like this are at least trying to be active in their warning, and hope it’s not just a “CYA” measure.

It’s also interesting to note that I received a the same  exact reply to this message at least 13 times, all with the same case/reference number.  Weird.

https://aixelsyd13.com/wp-content/uploads/2010/10/allergy-sign-d-donuts-p_00527.jpg

Giant Eagle on Allergy Signage… [Incident #: 12702111]

Posted on by Standard 1

So, remember my allergen warning sign photos from Dunkin’ Donuts and Giant Eagle?  I wrote to both of them to thank them for displaying the signs, and Giant Eagle is the first to reply.  I submitted this via webform:

Hello,

I’d like to thank you for actively posting allergen awareness/warning signage.  Sunday, I came upon this sign above some chocolate chunk (& other) cookies on a display table at the GE in Parkway Center: http://bit.ly/bg09rX

As someone with a severe allergy to shellfish, I appreciate these kinds of signs… but the all-inclusive sign begs the question:  Did these cookies come into contact with any shellfish in the bakery?  I hope not!  I worry enough about the crab cakes & seafood salad in the deli counters!

Thank you for your time, I look forward to hearing from you!

-Eric
me@my.email.address

And their reply:

From: sc autoemail <sc.autoemail@gianteagle.com>
To: “me@my.email.address” <me@my.email.address>
Sent: Fri, October 8, 2010 9:06:49 AM
Subject: In response to Giant Eagle Incident #: 12702111

ServiceCenter Operator: arabia michele

In response to your recent communication:

Incident #: 12702111

Brief Description:
Store: Parkway Center Giant Eagle Hello, I’d like to tha

Response:
At  10/08/10 09:06:47  we wrote:
10/08/10 09:06:47 (arabia michele):

Good Morning Eric,

Thank you for contacting Giant Eagle and for sharing your thoughts and concerns with us regarding our allergen signs and the possibility of cross-contamination of shellfish in the bakery.

The sign was generated to alert allergen sensitive customers that our stores do process all allergens. You are correct in your assumption that seafood is not present in the bakery department. We appreciate your feedback and will use it to determine signage needs in the future.

If you have any further questions or comments, please contact our Customer Care Department toll-free at 1-800-553-2324.

Again, thank you for taking the time to contact us and please know that we welcome your thoughts and feedback in the future.

Sincerely,

Michele Arabia
Bakery Merchandising Department
Giant Eagle, Inc.

I’d like to see stores become more active in labeling prepared foods, but this is a a start.  As noted in the comments on my last allergy post, they are currently doing more than required by law… so that’s a good thing.

 

https://aixelsyd13.com/wp-content/uploads/2010/10/allergy-sign-giant-eagle-p_00533.jpg

Allergen Signage

Posted on by Standard 6

Over the weekend I was at two places where I saw these allergen signs, the Dunkin’ Donuts in Dormont, and the Giant Eagle in Parkway Center.  Generally when I see these signs it makes me happy that the place who’s taking my money is at the very least aware that there are products that they have on the premises that may cause certain people some discomfort or possibly even death.

Dunkin' Donuts | Allergen Warning Signage
Dunkin’ Donuts | Allergen Warning Signage

In viewing the allergen information online as the sign suggests, I’m glad that a glazed donut doesn’t contain any crustaceans, but I may now have to scour the rest of the site to see if anything does.   Ha ha ha.

Giant Eagle | Allergen Warning Signage
Giant Eagle | Allergen Warning Signage

I gambled yesterday, hoping that the chocolate chunk cookies  I purchased didn’t come into contact with any shellfish in the bakery.  If I died from eating them, according to this sign, it’s my fault.  I was warned, and should have discussed the risks of cross-contamination with my doctor.

You’ll hopefully be glad to know that I’m not dead, and I had a few cookies last night.  Wow, I had poor eating habits this weekend.  Ha ha ha.  Donuts & Cookies.

At any rate, the fact that they simply acknowledge that allergies exist is a great start.  It’s sad, but so many other food-service companies go with the “it’s not our problem” mantra.  I always thought that Five Guys Burgers  & Fries to be very pro-active with their peanut allergy warnings, and I have commented on the Market District in Robinson’s allergen warnings before.

If you suffer from allergies, do these signs make you feel safer, or are they a blanket statement like “No Lifeguard on Duty” or “Park at Your Own Risk”, trying to absolve the poster of any wrongdoing should a mishap occur?

The blanket statement from Giant Eagle seems a little forced, or an afterthought… as I’m sure there aren’t many lobster cookies in the bakery, but then again there just might be.  How am I to know?  Do I just take this sign as a warning to not eat any food that they prepare?  The sign itself is a great thing, but if it were tailored just a little more to the actual product, it might be more comforting.

I know I’m always afraid of the stuff in the deli counter that’s next to the crab cakes or a seafood salad…  I don’t want a pasta salad with death-fish in it.  Yes, that one little glob of death-juice can kill me.  I don’t see any allergen warning signs there where they’d also be appropriate.  But, I don’t want to get down on Giant Eagle.  They are taking steps in the right direction.  Perhaps I’ll even send them a quick email to let them know that as someone who suffers from a severe food allergy, I appreciate the signage.

If you suffer from allergies, have someone in the family that does, or have a friend that blathers incessantly about them (like me), I’d like to hear your thoughts on the signs.  Are they a good thing, or a bad thing?  Are they proactive or defensive?

What if you suffer from one that’s not a “big 8” allergen but also quite prevalent like corn, peppers, or chocolate?

Dark Lord of the 5th Day?

Posted on by Standard 6

Yeah, it’s a stretch, but I wanted to share some more goodies.  I made some Star Wars ringtones a while ago, and thought I’d share.  If you don’t know how to get them to your phone, try Ventones.

Also, here’s some more fun from Bentframe…

Bentframe – “Star Wars Gangsta Rap” [Special Edition]

Vodpod videos no longer available.

Bentframe – “Star Wars Gangsta Rap 2”

Bentframe – “Star Wars Techno Cut”

Vodpod videos no longer available.

more about “Bentframe – “Star Wars Techno Cut”“, posted with vodpod

Bentframe – “Star Wars Gangsta Rap Chronicles”

Vodpod videos no longer available.

Bentframe used to have a ton of stuff on mp3.com back when they actually hosted mp3’s and made CD’s for you.  Now they’ve sort of disappeared… I wish I could get some more of these tracks on CD!

You can still find them on Atom.com.

I have two funny discs from them, check ’em out if you can find them…

Bentframe 100% Uncut Comedy The BentSide Comedy Project

Photo from the Pens game last night…

Posted on by Standard 2

Got a good shot from my cell phone last night at the start of the 3rd period.  tumblr treats your photos a lot better than Facebook…

Buffalo Sabres @ Pittsburgh Penguins - 02/01/2010 (Mellon Arena)

We were sitting in section D23.  Not bad for a cell phone camera, eh?

Oh yeah, the Pens won.

The Trans-Siberian Orchestra @ Mellon Arena (Review)

Posted on by Standard 2

You may have read my earlier posts about the seats for Star Wars: In Concert, and how complaining about them eventually translated into two free seats for yesterday afternoon’s Trans-Siberian Orchestra show.

Our seats were in the EI-2 section, row L.  We were ridiculously close to the stage and not so far up & to the side that we couldn’t appreciate the view.  I need to write to Mr. Scalzott again for providing the free tickets and hospitality of the arena.

I’ve got to say, this was an excellent show… and I’d love to go back if I can afford to next time they’re in town.  The TSO really knows how to put on an event.  The Star Wars: In Concert crew could learn a lesson from them in lighting, lasers, fog machines,  floating remote stages, hydraulics, and pyrotechnics.  Actually, they could learn a few lessons.  I can imagine a hybrid of the two that would be absolutely ridiculous.  Maybe I need to write to the TSO, John Williams, and George Lucas.  Ha ha ha.

A few things surprised me about the show…  I had no idea that there were vocals & power-ballady type songs, and that there  was a cohesive story for the most part.  I feel like it kept it entertaining for all types of people.  The narrator & vocalists were awesome.  Sadly my prior knowledge of the TSO consisted of an mp3 with an incorrect ID3 tag, mislabeling “Christmas Eve/Sarajevo 12/24” for “Carol of the Bells” (which it arguably is… along with “God Rest Ye Merry Gentlemen”).

I had no idea that Alex Skolnick or the other guys from Savatage were associated with this.  Skolnick wrote articles for just about every guitar magazine that I ever picked up back when I was learning to play & read tab.  They made the show like a metal concert at times… I thought one guy in the front was going to have a heart attack and die when he threw metal with both hands as Alex was molesting the fretboard in front of him.  When the show reached it’s second half, they introduced some stuff from the new album, Night Castle.  I swear they snuck some Sabbath & Metallica riffs in there.  There was even an old-school 80’s-rock drum solo… and I think I loved the fact that old ladies were watching the solo in abject horror as much as I liked the spectacle itself.  They also had a girl playing the electric violin… I saw it more than I heard it… but it was visually pretty cool element, like the spinning keyboard.

I didn’t know that it had heavy religious overtones.  I mean, I knew it was a holiday concert… and I’m certainly not opposed to religious ideals.  I just didn’t know, and found it surprising… especially with tightly clothed women dancing like strippers in front of fire.  I think it’s cool that they can integrate the stuff, maybe some overzealous idiot out there got the message to loosen up a bit.  While they played a medley that included the melody of “Canon in D”, the girls were dancing scantily-clad on the stage… and I asked my wife Bethany if we had to call t “Canon in Double-D”.

Like I mentioned before, it being entertaining to everybody…  I mean everybody.  There were all kinds of people there… classes, ages, stereotypes, whatever group  you want to name, they were there (except maybe race… it was all crackers up in there).  I did see an extraordinarily high amount of mullets though.  I’m talking prize-winning specimens like the comb-over on top/hair down to my ass & the trimmed up top/pony tail in the back.

I can’t say anything negative about the show itself, the seats, or the arena… except (you knew it was coming) that I found the parking rate to be amusing.  By looking on the Arena website, it listed parking in the lot where we parked as $7, but it does note “Event parking rates differ for each Mellon Arena event. Check your event’s information page on this website for specific parking rates”.  The funny part is that it said nothing about parking on the event page other than the fact that no pre-sold parking would be available.  Parking was $15… more than double the normal rate, which is fine, but there was no prior indication.  I paid in mostly $1’s and even some quarters.

I hope the TSO and the Mellon Arena don’t mind if I share some crappy quality cell phone photos…