I had some time recently, and I wanted to see what the process was to publish a print-on-demand book from Amazon. I grabbed a bunch of my smaller easy mazes with no discernable theme that I had previously posted here & on Instagram, and assembled them into a book. All of them were scanned in & maybe fixed a bit with paint.NET, and I put the pages of the book together with OpenOffice, so my only cost came down to the pens & paper. (Not sure how to quantify time & sanity.)
Yup, I finally did it. After drawing mazes for decades.
It was very simple to publish with Amazon. This gave me the confidence to put together another book, perhaps with a bit more coherence, and definitely with a much better cover. I have already started drawing new mazes in a neat little box template so they’re a bit more consistent. What’s a good number? 30? 50?
Also, I need to get all of these older mazes scanned & into a book too. I have some pages that are bigger than my scanner bed though. Perhaps a trip to FedEx Office or Staples is in order.
I just kind of set the price arbitrarily to make a little bit off of publishing. I’m not looking to get rich, but it would be nice to finally make income of off artistic output after decades of ostensibly doodling. (I won’t delve into my musical endeavors which are break even at best but probably a negative sum game. 🤣)
Luckily the creative outlet for me is just that, an outlet. I think we all need to express ourselves artistically or through sports, gardening, or other hobbies.
It also suggested I make a Kindle version, so I did that too. I am not sure if the concept will work there. Can you draw on a Kindle screen with a stylus or your finger? Can you print from a Kindle? I must confess I don’t have one. I am still a fan of books in the traditional form.
If you have ever enjoyed my mazes, or have been one of the awesome people that has completed them and sent in the solution – I humbly ask you (if you’re so inclined) to purchase a paperback for around $6 or a Kindle book for around $3 and let me know what you think. Should I do more? Did you enjoy it? Is the quality any good?
Really, I ask you to try even if you have never solved one of my mazes. Now is a good time to start!
It might make a good gift for kids or adults. It’s a nice way to pass some time or zone out.
If you do buy, can you leave an honest rating/review? I feel like that goes a long way with Amazon.
If you can’t buy or are really not interested, that’s OK too! I would ask you to maybe share the link around.
My thoughts on the next one are that I probably need a table of contents, to maybe title the mazes, and… should I include the solutions in the back? That’s one of my issues. I like to draw the mazes, but don’t really solve them. I may need to reach out for help on that part & pay someone to complete them so I can include the solutions (and make sure they’re solvable).
I probably need help with a title, too.
Thanks for reading, tanks for considering, and please share this link on every social media platform known to humankind: https://www.amazon.com/dp/B0CH2FMH7W
They say Pennsylvania has two seasons, Winter & Construction. The secret is, it’s always construction season! Celebrate with a maze while you’re sitting in traffic. Just, not while you’re driving.
I was recently in the hospital & had the time to draw a ridiculous amount of mazes. They helped me work through the pain and just kind of zone out a bit. Check them all out on my Instagram accounts at @AiXeLsyD13 & @MyMazes. (A few have multiple mazes in each post.)
Since Twitter became 𝕏, WordPress doesn’t push links there. I think Facebook eats links. And, I get no interaction from Threads or Blue Sky so far.
If you print & complete one of these, or finish it right on your screen, please post to your favorite social media & tag me! I’m @AiXeLsyD13 on pretty much everything, and it’s easy to find the blog page or me on Facebook.
Hopefully, I have some more cool maze-related news coming soon.
Family photo in front of the LEGO statue of Liberty.
This year, we let the kids pick the vacations. Luckily a new job afforded me more time, and we took a year off from being camp counselors/directors. I had offered the beach. I hate the beach, but we have never gone as a family. They brainstormed & settled on Legoland in New York, a trip to visit good friends that live in NJ who took us to New York City, and an upcoming trip to Washington DC.
My wife did the booking/research and set us up for 3 nights in the hotel and 2 days in the park. We both looked at two Facebook groups prior to going to help glean some knowledge:
Somehow, I was dirty banned from the first group with no warning or explanation. 😂 The second group is totally cool. I would suggest joining both. The only thing I can think that got me banned was the toilet thing (keep reading), or that I said to take cash even though they all said not to. (More on that in a bit too.)
I’ll put a list of my tips at the end.
Full disclosure: I like LEGO as much as if not more than the kids. We all do. Even my wife has gotten into building some really cool sets.
The photo packaghe was worth it.My magnet may get glued together…
The hotel was super cool. We stayed in a Kingdom themed room. It had a separate nook with bunk bends and a TV for the kids, and a King-sized bed & TV for the adults. It came with a bin full of mostly Duplo & some LEGO to play with. It also had a treasure-hunt the first day to get (3) LEGO poly bag sets. We got them the 2nd night too, but not the 3rd. 🤷
This guy guards the treasure.Found it!
I think we watched ALL of the LEGO movies in the room. That was neat.
The lobby has a giant castle that looks like LEGO, a treasure-trove of Duplo & Lego blocks, a climbing wall that isn’t a climbing wall, an area with large LEGO bricks made out of some material that feels like Crocs. There are so many photo opportunities throughout the hotel and park, it’s crazy.
I want one in the back yard.Where can I buy these Croc-LEGO hybrids?
“We’re loners Dottie, rebels!”
Yeah. 4,672 kids climbed on this wall. Employees would all politely tell them to get off, and the parent / grandparent / aunt / uncle /random stranger would undoubtedly always exclaim “But, it looks like a climbing wall!” There is a sign to the left that says not to climb… but really, it LOOKS like a climbing wall. I suggest the shore it up so it’s safe to climb, or put stuff on the shelves so they don’t look like seats. Or maybe get a bigger more centralized “No Climbing” sign.
The restaurants in the park & at the hotel were interesting. They were crazy expensive, which we had gleaned from the groups, and kind of just expected anyway. The food was eh. I did not like their “fry sauce” on the burger. Breakfast was free with the stay and was a nice tray with scrambled eggs, bacon, toast, French toast sticks, sausage, tator tots or home fries, fresh fruit, and the option of coffee, juice, milk, or water to drink. Pop or iced tea was an up charge.
🐉
The rides and attractions are definitely geared to pre-teen kids, but were fun for the whole family. The Dragon was my son’s first roller coaster ride. The indoor rides were fun, and of course they drop you in the gift shops. We kept telling my son that the same stuff would be in the big store. We were wrong. Some stuff was different. No build a minifigure in the big store.
We did not do the water park… It’s convoluted as you have to reserve time in 20 minute increments and it seems like a wild pain in the keister. We thought about doing the pool at the hotel after the park, but we decided to chill the first day and it was raining the second day. The pirate themed rides were perfect for us.
I almost bought the park-exclusive Legoland New York set, and would have for $75, but I didn’t feel like it was worth the $100 asking price. Maybe next time? We did get the photo package for one day, and they kids’ LEGOLAND drivers license photos. I did buy two little New York City themed sets.
OH NO!
The thing that made me laugh the most was our toilet project.
My son was having fun playing with the blocks and all the other kids in the hotel lobby. He became somewhat of a warmonger or arms dealer. Kids were coming up to him like he was Peter Dinklage in that Thor Movie where he forged Stormbreaker, or Tony Stark supplying all sides with arms. He was making Duplo and LEGO swords, guns, and who knows what else for any kid that would ask. He was having an absolute blast. I built Godzilla and a city to smash to pass some time. I also built a Duplo rubber duck and we attached to it a Ninjago figure’s head.
Then my daughter and I got silly. She built a pile of poop out of brown LEGO bricks. I told her to get me a bunch of white Duplo blocks, and made a toilet. At first, we just sat her stuffed LEGO guy in a chicken costume minifig on it. Then, we put it on the tray beside a salad that a LEGO waitress minifig sculpture was carrying. It was hilarious to see kids & adults discover it.
I’m easily amused. I don’t know what her deal is.
All-in-all, we had a great time. I think you will too if you’re into LEGO and your kids are the right age. Check out the last of my pics if you didn’t already see them on Instagram, or skip down to my helpful tips!
GIRL SCOUT COOKIES.Imagine the car is Legoland, and I am my bank account.I didn’t do it.Even LEGO skulls are cool. ☠️#TeamDaveThey sang to us.We rode the real one later that week!Impressive, but the real thing was WILD.The kids loved this guy.This isn’;’t nearly all of them.New York Postcard 40519 | OtherNew York City 21028 | Architecture
My LEGOLAND New York tips:
I would suggest getting the app. It was helpful with menus, maps, reservations, etc.
You scan a barcode for the menus as the hotel restaurants.
You can use the app to order at some food establishments in the park.
You need reservations for the $20 cafeteria burger meals at the Bricks Family restaurant.
Don’t climb the wall that looks like a climbing wall, or do it quick before they yell at you.
Get the burger with the fry sauce on the side.
The BBQ place was good!
The crappy unwanted minifigures your kid brings to trade are the same ones that every other kid brings to trade, and what the employees have on their carts or badges to offer for trade.
BRING CASH.💵 Even though the Legoland NY FB tips & tricks group that unceremoniously booted me implores you to leave all cash at home… You want to tip, right? If you want to leave a tip for breakfast where you don’t get any add-ons, for the room service, or the hotel cleaning staff, you need cash.
There is not even an ATM on site, I asked the front desk.
Don’t try to use cash anywhere else there, which is actually fantastic.
We had the kids save up their own money for vacation, then put it on VISA gift cards before we went. They purchased what they wanted at their own discretion. We bought them one clothing or stuffed animal item each.
Kids’ meals come with a juice pouch in the cute little lunch bag… but it doesn’t advertise that anywhere… so, we bought 2 extra drinks for $10 the first lunch. 🤦♂️
Pack a bag with water, snacks, or even lunch.
The build-you-own minifigure part selection was grim in the hotel store.
If this inspires you to do one, that would be awesome. Post on social media & tag me @AiXeLsyD13 on just about everything. (Except PayPal. Whoever has that must be a real asshole because I have been using AiXeLsyD13 since like Angelfire and AOL Instant Messenger.) I am trying out Threads and Blue Sky while Twitter is becoming 𝕏. I gave up on Mastodon and that one other one I forget the name of.
You can also email it to me like this anonymous solver did at world.and.lunar.domination@gmail.com.
☡🚧🚨🚨🚨🚧 SPOILER ALERT!Solution Below: 🚧🚨🚨🚨🚧☡
Reader-submitted solution to a 2012 maze that I inexplicably called “Shift Spiral Spin.”
It started with some warning post cards & emails. Dollar Shave Club was phasing out the three bladed razors in favor of the 4… and switching my plan without asking. Well, mine, and all the other subscribers out there. Why?
Assuming a lot of their membership is male. Stereotypically, men are resistant to change. Why fix what’s not broken?
In the grand scheme of life, this is most certainly just a small annoyance… but an annoyance nonetheless. My typical email writing shenanigans has not provided any “real” answers other than some 🐂💩 about having done research that indicates people like the new blades.
The 4-blade razors feel like tiny demons ripping the hair out of your face one-by-one. I don’t know how a razor company messes up razors, but here we are. I can’t be the only one.
I feel like they had to stop making them for some reason. Costs? Manufacturing facility change? Why change a good thing? I thought they called them The Executive but now they’re calling them “Heritage.”
I sent them this maze via email, Twitter,Facebook, & Instagram, and that have not acknowledged it at all. 🤣
It’s not easy keeping up with these perpetually-out-of-style sideburns & my regal salt & pepper goatee.
The responses have been pretty banal. This was my original email:
Hello Friends,
I think you messed up… but it’s OK. I’m here for you in your time of need. I can help clear your mind so you can make better decisions.
I cannot find any fathomable reason that you needed to switch from the heritage series razors to the club series. The old 3-bladed razors were awesome. These new 4-blade razors are, to put it bluntly (pun intended), absolute shit. After one use with the new 4-bladed razors, it feels like someone is ripping the hairs out of my face.
Honestly, I never paid much attention to what the old ones were called. Was it The Executive? I don’t know. I don’t care. It shaved my face, well, and I did not like any of the other options.
Did you test it on people with alopecia or animals that could not provide feedback? Were you not alive during the New Coke debacle? People don’t like change. Men stereotypically do not like change. I get anxiety when my wife rearranges the furniture.
You can imagine my displeasure with being forced to use a new razor, and my irritation (pun, again, woefully intended) at the use of it. I have seen many other unsatisfied people on Twitter. They all can’t be wrong.
My gift to you is this maze. You can use it as you contemplate the best way to bring back the old blade. Labyrinths have traditionally helped people meditate. Surely it can help you come to a good decision and a concise quick plan to get out of this shenanigans.
I may be forced to try Harry’s, but I like your Shave Butter and I don’t think they have anything comparable. How can I control my goofy lambchop-exsque sideburns and more-salt-than-pepper van dyke/goatee thing without a razor I can trust? It is hard to maintain my perpetually out of style facial hair. (Do you see an anti-change theme here?)
Thank you for your time. I look forward to your thoughts on the whole thing… or at least an explanation of the thinking behind the change.
My face feels like Anakin when Obi Wan got the high ground.
Pleading for sanity,
-Eric.seitilibasid gninrael fo nuf ekam ot ynnuf ton yllaer s’tI
This was their blah reply…
Hey Eric,
Thanks for bringing this to our attention. Apologies for the late response. This certainly isn’t the experience we would have hoped for and the quality of our products is a top priority for us, so we appreciate you bringing this to our attention. We apologize for the trouble. I’ll be sure to forward your feedback to the right department for a review. Your experience is extremely valuable to us. We also understand that change can be difficult but we decided to make and sell our own Club Series razor.
Of course, if you’d prefer to cancel your account immediately, we understand as well. Just let us know what you decide and we can get that taken care of right away.
Thanks,
Jane
Then, this…
Thanks Jane,
Did you or any of your team at least try the maze while you thought it over?
This is an insane level of shenanigans. I thought it would help you reach the right decision to keep making the old style blades until the sun explodes & swallows the earth… or at least until I die.
I would cancel, but your shave butter is super awesome. I am stuck between a proverbial rock and a hard place, but the rock is traditional shaving cream or gel, and the hard place is your 4-blade razors that feel like they are tugging the follicles out of my face.
Dejected,
Bushy in Bridgeville
This was it. Again. Is “Jane” AI?
Hey Eric,
Thanks for getting back to us. We are currently working on this issue. Can you please confirm if you want me to cancel your account immediately? As checked, you have an item with your recurring box that will be billed this coming April 21st.
Looking forward to your response so we can have this taken care of.
Thanks,
Jane
I guess this is where it ends, my friends.
Hello Jane,
I guess I would like you to cancel my subscription. I feel like you’re “sus” (as my kids would say) AI, and you’re not giving real reasons why the blades were changed, or even acknowledging my hilarious maze.
I think I may go with Amazon. Harry’s doesn’t appear to have that shave butter goodness… and Amazon has a plethora of options. I get TV, music, and everything else from Amazon anyway. I, for one, welcome our capitalist digital overlords. Maybe they have a sense of humor? I can draw them a maze and see if they appreciate it.
It’s never too late to re-think your bad decisions. Please share the maze with your friends & co-workers.
-Eric.
seitilibasid gninrael fo nuf ekam ot ynnuf ton yllaer s’tI
I would move to Harry’s, but they seem to not have anything comparable to DSC’s Shave Butter. I am a convert. No more cream or gel for me. I need to try this dastardly 6-bladed razor. Perhaps an Amazon subscription service will do me well?
They didn’t respond via Facebook messenger, a DM on Twitter seemed very AI, and Instagram’s DM was not entertaining in the least.
I’m not the only one who thought so either. Twitter is LIT UP about it.
Still can't figure out why @DollarShaveClub wpuld discontinue a blade that I (& most likely countless others) have been using & enjoying for many years.
The new default replacement is terrible, required several passes, & still didn't get a close shave.
@DollarShaveClub so got my package about a week ago and it wasn't correct u gave me this shit ravors and and wasn't what my normal order is. These blades and this razor is trash compared to the elite. Can't seem to contact through ur site. pic.twitter.com/BSKzbTBXng
@DollarShaveClub I’ve received nothing as a request from you. Please we are going to break up taylor swift style (I’m going to write a song) if you don’t send me a ton of your old razors. The 37 other people I have hooked you up with over the years, also super unhappy. #dobetter
After over 10 years of Member feedback about what makes a great shave, we decided to make and sell our Club Series razor everywhere and anywhere Dollar Shave Club razors are sold. So no matter where you shop, you will find this razor in stores and online.
So, @DollarShaveClub… did anyone try these new blades? I had to make 3 passes. My last ones were perfect. Why the change? Do I need to switch to @harrys or go back to buying in store? This is 🐎💩.
That's unfortunate, after 3 weeks of issues with the Club series I've had to cancel my subscription. If it was a cost decision I would have gladly paid more for the quality and experience of the Heritage Series instead of losing the line entirely.
That's unfortunate, after 3 weeks of issues with the Club series I've had to cancel my subscription. If it was a cost decision I would have gladly paid more for the quality and experience of the Heritage Series instead of losing the line entirely.
@DollarShaveClub your new razors are worse than the ones I shaved my legs with in 1989 they were .25 and my moms the old razors you had were amazing I’m seriously bleeding from the new ones. #trash#cancelingmembership
I got my 6 month @DollarShaveClub order of creams, gels & blades. They changed the blades to some thin POS. Absolutely disappointing. After 4 years I’m going to find a new brand. I shave my head & face daily and this new blade takes 2x longer now… ThX @Unilever for acquiring DSC
@DollarShaveClub Ugh. My Heritage series handle broke and I still have some blades left. I ordered what I thought were the right handles and see now that you've made changes. How can I get a Heritage series handle? #frustrating
— UniverseOfSciFi 🌊💙 I Dissent (@UOFSciFi) March 27, 2023
@DollarShaveClub I scrolled through Twitter to see what everyone else has said..I'm adding to the mix in hopes you'll go back to the older razors. The new razors suck. When you bring back a membership for the older razors, I'll return as a customer, until then, see ya.
@DollarShaveClub why did I start getting new blades and handle that I did not order? I thought it was a trial but then I got more. I tried the new product and the handle broke after 2 weeks. Refund my money for this junk you automatically sent me and continue my other razors
@DollarShaveClub the new blades are HORRIBLE and when I attempt to log in and cancel, you’ve purposefully made it impossible to do to. Terrible terrible customer service.
OK bearded & mustachioed folks, I need a razor rec. The new razors from @DollarShaveClub are not as precise as the previous model, and the new trimming blade is subpar.
Not sure why but @DollarShaveClub cancelled the best razor ever and are now shipping cheap junk in 4 and 6 blade versions that don’t cut evenly and fall apart- plus they feel too lightweight and plasticky. pic.twitter.com/VgrCzv8zZ5
So, right before new years, I went on adventure looking for mini cocktail rye breads from Pepperidge Farm. They used to make one called Jewish Rye, and Pumpernickel.
The Jewish Rye was cool because it contained ground caraway seeds instead of the standard whole caraway seeds. I have had bouts with Diverticulitis, so I try to stay hydrated & avoid tiny sharp seeds. Caraway absolutely ruins sauerkraut, but it is good in rye bread.
Pumpernickel is cool because it essentially is named for the devil’s farts… and if that’s not cool, I don’t know what is. This is also code in my household for “I am always right.” I told my wife the name origin behind it, she said there was no way, Googled it… and, like I said… I am always right.
Did they just stop making those little mini seedless cocktail rye bread things? They are increasingly hard to find every new year. Struck out at Kuhn's & Shop 'n Save, @GiantEagle has been a miss the last few years. Maybe @FreshThymeFM?
I know that the other manufacturer, S. Rosen, make cocktail-sized rye and pumpernickel bread… but the rye is not seedless. Apparently Hanky Panky means something entirely different in some parts of Ohio.
My wife likes to make this stuff for New Year’s that’s like swiss cheese, lemon-pepper, and mayo on the cocktail-sized Jewish Rye then toasted in the oven. It’s delicious. I like to make little mini open faced Reubens. The pumpernickel would be an acceptable alternative if I absolutely can’t find the seedless rye.
Because I’m weird and can’t leave anything alone, we have this…
Hey there, Eric. We're sorry to hear you're having trouble finding our Party Rye and Pumpernickel Bread. Unfortunately, we have discontinued it. We will be sure to let the team know you were looking for it. https://t.co/7lhEBw42Iu
I, of course, posted it on Twitter, Instagram, & Facebook. I tagged Pepperidge Farm & Pepperidge Farm Cares. To their credit, they did reply:
Hi there, we're sorry to hear this! Unfortunately, this variety is no longer available. We will pass along to our team that you want to see them return.
I did tag all the stores that I could in the photo on Instagram and Facebook, but none of them have taken the bait.
I had to turn it up a notch, to which they did not reply:
All of that just says:
Hello,
I was wondering if anyone had time to try and complete my maze while considering bringing back cocktail-sized Jewish Rye.
The ground caraway was awesome, because it isn’t a potential diverticulitis disaster like whole seeds are.
My wife wpuld [sic] use it to make this delicious lemon pepper cheese appetizer, and I like to make tiny Reuben sandwiches and pretend I am a reformed King King that no longer has to eat people sacrificed to me on Skull Island.
The mini pumpernickel is cool just because of the etymology. I mean? It has to be the most metal bread out there. 🤘
How can you discontinue such wonderful things?
Also, AI generated art seems to be the cool thing these days, so I tried to make this on a few different ones to go along with the blog post:
I may have to buy a gorilla suit and make some tiny Reubens with the S. Rosen bread… and convince the wife or kids to take my photo.
Or, I may have to make a maze for S. Rosen, featuring a caraway seed that must make the journey through my guys without getting stuck, causing inflammation & a possible infection. Or maybe it has to make its way through a grinder before beign added to the dough & baked?
@SRosens1909 So, do you guys make a seedless cocktail rye bread, or just the Pumpernickel (the most metal of all breads! 🤘💨)?
I know the big PF dropped the ball and you picked up the slack. Bravo!
I doubt than anyone at Pepperidge Farm or Pepperidge Farm Cares is going to complete my maze. But, if they do, you can thank me later.
As far as discussion here, which I always ask for yet rarely get in the comments, let me know what you do with mini cocktail rye or pumpernickel bread.
Also… Ler’s discuss Reubens. Russian or Thousand Island? Regular rye or marbled? Do you add anything like bacon or swap out corned beef for Pastrami? Do you ever use Havarti instead of Swiss? Grilled in a pan, or on a panini press? I should blog about Reubens. Mmm. I’m hungry.
Also, please, please, complete the maze! Send me the results, post & tag me!
The most important takeaway is that if I tell you something, I am always right. Pumpernickel.
Are you with me so far? I bet you thought I forgot about #GreenPotatoGate. Maybe you had, and wish I had. I think this may be it, as I’m never going to get a full response from Giant Eagle, and I did get some coupons! First, are you all caught up?
Had enough? Of course you haven’t. Read on, brave soldiers for spuds and titans for tubers!
As promised, I did receive some coupons from Tasteful Selections. Way to stand behind their products! There was a cool ingredient card too, so I may check that out. I do like purple potatoes.
Giant Eagle reached out with a DM on Twitter, then nothing. 🦗🦗🦗
Hmm. @GiantEagle still hasn't replied about these @SideDelights potatoes… even though Side Delights has. They cite improper handling by the big bird. All I get are crickets, no chirps, tweets, or even screeches.
That was anti-climactic. They didn’t comment on the maze or the green potatoes.
I did, however, get one super awesome response to a positive message that I sent out about some potatoes from The Little Potato Compnay that I bought at Shop ‘n Save. I reached out like this:
From: Me <me@nunya.biz> Date: Sun, Jan 1, 2023 at 10:44 PM Subject: Thank you for a great product! 🥔 To: <feedback@littlepotatoes.com>
Salutations Spud Specialists!
I just wanted to reach out to thank you for your tremendous tiny tubers, or your perfect potatoes if you will.
Saturday I picked up a bag of the Terrific Trio style spuds from Shop ‘n Save in Heidelberg, PA, …and they were all fantastic.
You may think it’s odd to be so elated with a perfect product, but lately I have been on a crusade of sorts as I feel that nearly ¼ of all my purchased potatoes are green and arguably poisonous. Albeit very slightly poisonous.
I eat a lot of potatoes. So I buy a lot of potatoes. It seems like no one is immune to the great greening that has taken place iver the last few years. Yours were absolutely delicious though.
If you would like a window to my spiral into spud shenanigans, please feel free to catch the saga as it has unfolded so far at my blog:
I’m sure that I’m up to at least 2 readers semi-regulartly that aren’t me or AI bots. Well, I think.
I draw mazes. I sent mazes to some of your competitors as a means to get their attention, and perhaps stand out among all rhe other missives.
I am sending them you you as a thank you. Please, enjoy them and pass them along to your potato people! I would love if you got a chuckle out of them and if you took the time to try them out.
I really appreciate your multiple avenues of contact, prominently displayed right on the packaging, and a super easy to navigate website. I need to poke around the recipes!
I hope the new year brings you many new opportunities, great joy, & happiness.
Auld Lang Syne
-Eric
PS – Also attached is a photo collage of breakfast home fries with those fantastic tri-color delicious beauties.
And attached this photo (along with my potato mazes):
And I got this response:
From: Feedback feedback@littlepotatoes.com Date: Tue, Jan 3, 2023 at 12:21 PM Subject: RE: Thank you for a great product! 🥔 To: Me me@nunya.biz
Hi Eric,
Thank you so much for the aMAZEing feedback! I’m glad you enjoyed your Terrific Trio home fries!
I did some drawing, scanning with the HP app on the phone, and coloring with paint.NET this year. Please, if you print & solve or them on your phone, PC, or tablet… share the solution! You can share it here in the comments, or tag me on Instagram, Twitter, or whatever social media is popular nowadays. I generally try to grab @AiXeLsyD13 on all of them.
I have them in color, & in black & white.
Have a Merry Christmas, Happy Hanukkah, Have an Easy Fast for Yom Kippur, Happy Yule, Happy Solstice, Merry Yuletide, Ramadan Mubarak, Blessed Kwanzaa, Cathartic Festivus, or whatever holiday you celebrate!
Enjoy one of my Christmas Playlists to get you in the mood while you’re trying to solve these mazes, or share yours with me! Check out my other mazes if you’re ready for more! You can work on these while dinner is cooking, or tonight while youre trying to get to sleep & waiting for Santa!
Well. The garden plot thickens. Or something. I have a few more potato-related emails. All signs point to the grocery stores being at fault, and funnily enough the grocery stores have not replied, at all.
This happened, and we got a refund from Instacart. It’s not green potatoes, but they definitely weren’t ready to just toss into the crock pot with a roast.
If you’re wondering what the hell I am talking about, you must have missed the saga as it uprooted…
Thank you for reaching out. It’s always great to meet another potato enthusiast! As you may know, while we don’t represent any one brand, Potatoes USA works on behalf of more than 2,000 potato growers and handlers across the country to promote the benefits of eating potatoes. We’re happy to provide general feedback, and the individual brands and retailers can tell you more about their practices.
As far as green potatoes go, you’re correct that the color signifies the build-up of solanine. It’s a natural reaction to the potato being exposed to too much light. If there’s slight greening, you can cut away those green portions before cooking and eating. Generally speaking, you’re unlikely to ingest enough solanine to do you any harm.
However, I know you’re a potato skin fan (and rightly so). One bit of good news on the nutrition front is that the only nutrient significantly lost when the skin is removed is fiber. (A medium (5.3 oz) potato contains 2 grams of fiber with the skin and 1 gram of fiber without the skin.) Potassium and vitamin C are found predominantly in the flesh.
Potato growers take a number of steps to reduce greening, including maintaining enough soil cover over potatoes in the field and storing harvested potatoes in facilities with minimal light.
If you aren’t already, I’d encourage you to store your fresh potatoes in a cool, dark place. If you’re finding green potatoes upon returning from the store (or after Instacart delivery), you can often return them.
Thanks again for your note. We hope you have a spud-tacular holiday season, filled with plenty of potatoes.
Thank you for your response! I really appreciate your time and the imparted potato knowledge.
In my reaching out to several potato producers, it seems that they all want to lay the blame on the distribution and storage by the grocers.
So, the “all the vitamins are in the skin” that I got from my grandma when I was a kid was just potato public relations? 🤣
No matter, I agree they are delicious.
Please, enjoy the attached mazes with your friends, family, & co-workers!
I hope you enjoy you have a pleasant holiday season and a happy new year, and a great going season next year. I know I am looking forward to planting some potatoes myself.
I may leave out some potato candy for Santa, if I don’t eat it all!
Tuber-ular Tidings to you & yours!
-Eric
I sent the mazes again, like an idiot. Ha ha. I forgot I had sent them previously. No reply or acknowledgement this time.
This came as response from Tasteful Selections, which are the ones pictured above:
Hi Eric,
Thank you so much for contacting us. I am terribly sorry for the poor experience you had with our product. I can assure you that the quality you saw is not our standard, and for this I apologize.
We strive to ensure that every package of potatoes that leave our farm is handled with the utmost care in order to deliver a quality product to our consumers. Unfortunately, sometimes temperature changes and changes in light make potatoes break down or decay faster than they normally would.
The greening you’re experiencing occurs when potatoes have been exposed to too much light, either natural or artificial, that gives the potatoes a sort of “sunburn.” While greening is a result of light exposure, the visible greening can be delayed. Potatoes exposed to light may be packaged and continue to green beyond our last inspection point. We make every effort to avoid this, however, in your case we were not successful. You can cut the green out of the potatoes and use the rest (although that’s a bit tougher with small potatoes), but eating the green portion of the potato can give a very bitter flavor.
I am sincerely sorry for the inconvenience this has caused you. We stand by our products and you should not have had to have an experience like this. I would like to make it up to you by offering you a product voucher to hopefully help compensate you for your troubles.
If I may please have your mailing address, I would be happy to send you a product voucher straight away. Again, my personal apologies for the frustration this has caused you.
Thank you for your response! I have been exasperated lately with the amount of green or sprouting potatoes from the grocery store. It is a consistent issue across brands and stores, and whether we use a service like I Instacart or pick a bag ourselves.
I understand, from your reply among others, that the issue is most likely occurring after it leaves the potato farm.
Can retailers like Aldi, Giant Eagle, or Target be better educated about potato shipping and storage?
Instacart already refunded us for the purchase of the recently sprouting spuds as that was clearly a shopper error.
If it was spring, I would just plant them! You have a delicious variety of golden potatoes, perfect for home-fries!
Sometimes, the green potatoes don’t reveal themselves until you crack open that bag about to prepare a meal.
I would just like some sort of solution going forward. What can the potato industry do to hold grocers accountable?
If I wanted the gastrointestinal distress and discomfort associated with eating green potatoes, I would just dine at Taco Bell or Pizza Hut. Right?
My mailing address is…
Eric AiXeLsyD
#### Nunya St.
Bidness, PA #####-####
…but again I’m not really looking for free potatoes, I just want to get what I pay for.
I appreciate you reaching out, and pride in the quality of your product. Please find my gift of the attached potato mazes, and share them with your co-workers and friends if so inclined.
Have a very starchy Christmas and a tuber new year!
-Eric
And I got a reply:
Hi Eric,
Thanks so much for getting back to me. I definitely understand your concerns. Our sales & business development team are already working with Produce Managers and providing resources for storing and caring for potatoes. We’ll continue to do our part, however, it ends up being the responsiblity of Produce Managers to not only train their staff, but also make sure they are following through with the potato best practices.
I have a few coupons headed your way.
Sincerely, Jenny
I like free potatoes. I will be on the lookout for potato vouchers!
Now, I have reached several road-blocks with getting a message to Aldi. They apparently do not like to give out email addresses.
I dug up some email formats & corporate names on teh Google mosheen and sent this, also to no avail (so far):
Greetings My Frugal Friends,
I hope you are gearing up for a pleasant, festive, and relaxing holiday season! I appreciate your role in bringing food & other goodies to our homes.
I write to you today with some tuber related shenanigans I have noticed over the last few years. I have submitted a missive to your contact form at the Aldi website to no avail. I have been checking my junk/spam folder too.
I also tried reaching out via Facebook and Twitter… only to be told that your social media teams are unfathomably unable to forward messages to your customer service team or provide an email address. I had to do some Googling, and I pray to a higher power that this reaches a live intelligent and empathetic human being.
I love potatoes. At rhe risk of sounding like Forrest Gump’s friend Bubba droning on about shrimp…
I love potatoes. I like home fries, hash browns, mashed potatoes, baked potatoes, cheesy potatoes, hassleback potatoes, scalloped potatoes, potato candy, potato soup, lyinnaise potatoes, potato filling, tater tots, potato salad (hot or cold styles), shepherd’s pie, and sometimes even potato pancakes. Twice baked potatoes are a fantastic treat too. I hear potato vodka is good too, but I am not much of a drinker. Perhaps a potato beer would be more my speed if such a thing exists?
Nearly every bag of potatoes that I have purchased from your and/or your esteemed competitors over the last few years has had an alarmingly large amount of green solanine-filled potatoes. Glycoalkaloids are not our friends! On the mild end, eating green potatoes would be like chasing a Taco Bell meal with a laxative.
The straw that broke the proverbial camel’s back was one night at dinner when ready to bake 8 potatoes as a side to chili… 2 of the potatoes were totally green on the outside. They had been delivered by Instacart, but the green potatoes were not evident upon eying the outside of the bag.
That’s ¼ of rhe potatoes unusable for their intended purpose. Yes, I could have peeled away the green, but who wants a baked potato with no skin? That’s just craziness. Do I get ¼ of my money back?
I have written to and received replies from quite a few potato farms, and they all seem to point the finger at the end retailer… which in some cases is Aldi. They cite importer handling and storage… specifically exposure to light and longer than optimal time frames.
Perhaps the powers that be within your fine organization can put their heads together, asses your handling of these tiny starcchy underground gifts from heaven, and come up with ways to prevent waste? It may need to be a highly coordinated effort with logistics, distribution, shipping, and warehousing.
As an effort to aid exercise in meditation and clearing your thoughts, I have attached some potato themed mazes. Mazes and labyrinths have a history of assisting people to achieve a zen like state. Perhaps this will provide the needed clarity to prevent ultra violet potato decimation.
You have a fantastic business and I appreciate your effort to bring quality goods to the more budget-concious among us.
If requested, I can even forward my original (perhaps lost?) message.
Thank you for your time, I look forward to your thoughts on the matter!
Let’s root for a starchy Christmas and a tuber new year! -Eric
So, maybe that will get something. Maybe not. Giant Eagle hasn’t bothered to reply either.
Hmm. @GiantEagle still hasn't replied about these @SideDelights potatoes… even though Side Delights has. They cite improper handling by the big bird. All I get are crickets, no chirps, tweets, or even screeches.
@tastefulselect we got these from @aldiusa via @instacart yesterday. Instacart has refunded, but what gives with the ongoing potato issues? I have had so many green ones this past year or so. Are stores shipping/storing improperly?
Yeah, tried that. Got a phone number. Not interested in calling. I would like to send an email, but no one will provide an email address, and apparently your social media team can't just forward a DM to the customer service department. 🤷♂️🤦♂️
The starchy spud saga continues. This time I got an email from Sun-Glo who packs potatoes for Side Delights. Side delights was the brand I caught at Giant Eagle in Bridgeville that was a bag of entirely green potatoes. I probably reached out to this company twice, or maybe three times. I did not purchase that bag, and I have not had a concrete reply from Giant Eagle or Aldi USA yet. The potato farmers seem to place all the blame at the feet of the grocer.
Good afternoon,
I appreciate your email about green potatoes.
The one thing I do want to stress to you is this…..we have USDA and internal inspectors in our warehouse at all times. If the potatoes were green in a bag, they would not pass our inspections and would be not pass. When the potatoes leave our plant, they have passed a USDA inspection.
The one thing we can’t control is how fast or slow the retailers turn their inventory. Potatoes are going to turn green under artificial lights, there is nothing we can do to control this.
There is a website that you might find helpful with a lot of ‘potato knowledge” that the Idaho Potato Commission answers most questions you might have about potatoes. Idahopotato.com
And, I feel like I am ratcheting up the ridiculous with each reply.
Hello Jill,
Thank you for the reply! It is interesting to learn that Sun-Glo and Side Delights potatoes are one in the same!
I am sure you have strict quality control standards, that’s why it is so surprising to see so many green potatoes out in the wild.
I did see but did not purchase a nearly entirely green bag of Side Delights potatoes this Sunday at Giant Eagle in Bridgeville PA.
Monday at the South Fayette PA Giant Eagle, I noticed a fine looking bag of potatoes with the Sun-Glo label.
I have been reaching out to as many potato farmers as I can. The issue seems to go back a few years, and I confess I have not payed much attention to brand. We typically shop at Aldi and Gaint Eagle, but sometimes Shop ‘n Save, Target, Walmart, or even BJ’s Wholesale.
What has been brought to light (pun intended) is that Giant Eagle and Aldi must be improperly shipping, storing, or handling potatoes across the board.
The common denominator seems to be too much artificial light?
Maybe they need to start selling potatoes in rooms with red lights like darkroom back in the 1900’s when people had to develop film.
I have reached out to Aldi and Gaint Eagle to no avail (so far). They are not as quick as you at returning inquiries.
I will most definitely have to do some more research on the Idaho Potato website.
I do grow some of my own in the summer, but I am hardly a titan of tubers, or even a sultan of spuds… perhaps a prefect of potatoes? I could grow some more if I learn to store them properly myself.
I should blog more potato recipes. I cook a lot of potatoes.
Please, find the attached mazes for your enjoyment, and share them with your co-workers. I will also attach the photos of the bag I saw Sunday at Giant Eagle.
Perhaps my mazes can be used in potato safety & storage education going forward?
I appreciate your time, your concern, your knowledge, and your zeal for getting directly to the point. Honestly, and probably obviously, that is something I need to work on.
This makes me think of the books Idiot Letters and The Complete Idiot Letters by Paul Rosa, which probably started all of this with me. I used to also write letters via snail mail before email became a thing. Somewhat less inspiring but still awesome were Ted Nacny’s Letters from a Nut and the Emails from an Asshole website from John Lindsay.
![Hello,
I was wondering if anyone had time to try and complete my maze while considering bringing back cocktail-sized Jewish Rye.
The ground caraway was awesome, because it isn't a potential diverticulitis disaster like whole seeds are.
My wife wpuld [sic] use it to make this delicious lemon pepper cheese appetizer, and I like to make tiny Reuben sandwiches and pretend I am a reformed King King that no longer has to eat people sacrificed to me on Skull Island.
The mini pumpernickel is cool just because of the etymology. I mean? It has to be the most metal bread out there.
How can you discontinue such wonderful things?](https://aixelsyd13.com/wp-content/uploads/2023/01/wp-1674692091553.jpg?w=220)
World (and Lunar) Domination 