Tag Archives: manager

McConsistency is Key.

Posted on by Standard 5

Recently for lunch, I had a reconstituted-onion & cheese sandwich from McDonald’s with a little bit of beef on it.  It was extra special because it was pressed.  It was not like a panini press with grill lines, but more like someone sat on it.  There were also pickles stacked on top of each other, sticking out of the side.  Very artful & creative!

This wasn’t even from the West Liberty location.

I recently had a friend send one of his friends’ McTale-of-woe to me, because I have apparently become some sort of authority on all things wrong with McDonald’s customer service.

The reason I told of my recent adventure in lunch, is that it fits with the tale as told by someone who wishes to remain nameless, blameless, & shameless:

From: Pattyless Sandwich
Date: Wed, Sep 28, 2011 at 9:29 AM
Subject: The Day McDonald’s Shit All Over My Good Time
To: The Hamburglar

On Sept. 27, 2011 I went through the drive thru at McDonald’s on Mt. Lebanon Blvd. in Castle Shannon, PA. I ordered a number 4 (two cheeseburgers), and I asked for no onion. When I got back to my friends house and we started eating I noticed that the sandwich looked really thin but I just figured it was smashed down a little more THAN NECESSARY so I bit in anyway. As I was chewing, I realized something wasn’t right about what was being smashed around in my mouth. I set my sandwich down and removed the top part of the bun to see the following: slice of cheese on the bottom half of the bun, pickles, ketchup, and mustard. Yes, that is correct, there was no meat on the sandwich. Luckily I had another sandwich, that in fact had the patty, to eat, but they put onions on it. The only thing I asked them to void. Now I understand work is work and if you have a job to live then that is fantastic, but to be the person to put the burgers together at McDonald’s, I feel like you go through a training day to be shown how to assemble them. Bottom bun, slice of cheese (I’m guessing it is on the bottom so the burger melts it, let’s not get crazy this shit isn’t cooked together), HAMBURGER PATTY, and then your condiments. Who put mine together and thought “hm….this looks right. Nothing is missing, I am a brilliant fucking burger maker extraordinaire.”? It’s not a hamburger from a hamburger joint if there is no meat. To quote a smart fast food chain (rhymes with Shmendy’s), “Where’s the beef!?”

Sincerely,
Pattyless Sandwich

And, there’s even a Facebook photo:

Veggie Burger?

Veggie Burger?

Ridiculous.  At least this didn’t come through my contact form from someone thinking I was McDonald’s.

Friends, I seriously wish I could write to the McGiant on your behalf, but all of my insane yet legitimate complaints have fallen on deaf ears, blind eyes, or typical McCustomer-Service employees.

Check out my track record.  While I feel for you, maybe try their McPennsylvania site?  I can do nothing at this point but perhaps share in your misery, my freinds!

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Can I have jelly? Can I have jelly? Can I have jelly?

Posted on by Standard 8

Bob Evans Restaurant on UrbanspoonI submitted this to Bob Evans’ contact form:

Last night we had a ridiculous visit to what is normally a decent restaurant.

We arrived shortly after 5:00pm, were seated quite quickly, and were alone in our section (the farthest away from the entrance).  The waitress came to us right away, seemed a little frazzled, and brought us drinks.  By this time another table had been seated in our section.  Our order was taken, a Rise & Shine breakfast for me, BBQ chicken for the wife.

We had actually just dined at this location on Friday evening and had discussed how despite otherwise excellent service & great food, generally my wife has to ask 3 times for jelly.  The standard procedure is that when we order and she gets biscuits, she asks for jelly.  When the biscuits come, with honey and butter but no jelly… she again asks for jelly.  When the meal comes, it’s the 3rd time that she asks for jelly… and usually we get jelly with the check.  It’s like you have it under lock & key or there’s only 1 magical jelly carrier.  I actually suggested that perhaps it’s like the movie Beetlejuice.  One must say “Betelgeuse, Betelgeuse, Betelgeuse!” to get the title character to appear.  Perhaps one must break the Bob Evans jelly code and ask for jelly three times at once.

No matter how much I wanted her to, she wouldn’t try it last night.  She asked for jelly just one time, and surprisingly, it came with the biscuits.

At this point, the manager walked by and asked if all was OK.  Truthfully, at this point, it was!  We nodded in satisfaction as we said “yes”.

Eventually, shortly before 6:00pm (yes, an hour later) after several other customers had been seated, had ordered, and been served, our waitress apologized for the wait and offered us more biscuits and a free dessert.  We told her the wait wasn’t her fault as she seemed to indicate it was due to a problem in the kitchen.

About the time where I was ready to get up, pay for our drinks, biscuits, jelly, and then leave to go to the nearby Sonic… our food arrived.  I understand that breakfast foods are greasy but my eggs & home fries were sitting in a pool of some oily or buttery liquid, and one of my over-easy yolks was already broken.  The bacon was fantastic.  The potatoes had so much grease on the outside, that when I dipped them into a pool of delicious Heinz ketchup they came out absolutely clean & ketchup free.  I managed to get the yolk out of one of the eggs with the biscuit that had sat there daring me to eat it for an hour.  I left the second egg and most of my potatoes out of disgust for the food and the service.  It had been a particularly trying couple of days and we chose Bob Evans because of the general consistency of the quality & service.  My wife indicated that other than the chicken being slightly over-done, her meal was excellent.  It’s crazy to believe that Bob Evans (the breakfast-food people) messed up such an incredibly simple breakfast.

Bob Evans

Bob Evans

The waitress had indicated some problems in the kitchen without any specifics, but we could hear arguments in & around the kitchen area for our entire visit.  I have no idea why we didn’t just get up & leave after the first 2 tables seated after us had received their food.  Perhaps we were in awe at the chaos.

I declined my free dessert, and my wife decided to get an apple pie to go just because it had been offered as compensation for our wait.  I was too disheartened for dessert, my friends… free or not.  Our waitress offered to refill my iced tea.  I said “no, thanks.”  She came back 10 minutes later & filled my iced tea anyway.  Still no pie.  I just wanted to go.  I was on the verge of just freaking out at the ridiculousness of it all.  We sat for another few minutes as the waitress took care of others around our section, before standing up to just finally go.  My wife just asked for the check as I was exasperated.  The other customers couldn’t wait for 2 minutes while she put a pie in the to-go container, since we had waited over an hour for a simple simple meal?

The waitress had apparently just placed my wife’s apple pie on a plate as we stood to make our escape… my wife said, “Never mind, we just need to get out of here.”  The waitress insisted on sliding the now decimated piece of pie into the Styrofoam box.  We went to pay, and for the first time ever were not asked something to the effect of “how was everything tonight?”  I believe there was small talk about my wife & I coincidentally wearing the same color green.  I think I remained silent for fear of just snapping.  We left a 15% tip, & took home a comment card.  (As a person with a severe allergy to shellfish, I have a small circle of places where I feel safe…  Bob Evans currently has no deathfish on the menu, so we frequent there and I generally tip 20% or more as I’m confident we’ll be returning soon & often.  I have even received excellent communication from your corporate level regarding food allergies & where things are prepared in the kitchen.)

This rant is obviously too long for a comment card.  I may blog it.  I may just leave it in the contact form at the Bob Evans site.  I may print & mail it.

Something was going on last night at Bob Evans in Bridgeville that was not good.  It was a comedy of errors.  The kitchen apparently had trouble producing eggs & home fries in a timely manner, keeping yolks whole, and draining grease/oil/butter from the fried meal.  The waitress was visibly and audibly frazzled as she complained to the customers that she was excessively busy even as most of the section was empty… at dinner time.  Perhaps she was covering two sections?  I’m not sure.  We saw her quite often… just not with our food.  How many others were seated after us & served before us that we couldn’t see?  We heard her arguing with a mysterious voice yelling out from the kitchen.  The manager did not appear to intervene or even suggest that perhaps they not argue so loudly within earshot of the guests… or even to step in, assert her role as a manager and solve the problem.  There was a waiter who appeared to be training a new waitress, happily ignoring all the chaos around them.

We did, however, receive jelly after asking only once.

✍

[Funny note… upon posting this & grabbing a link to UrbanSpoon, I saw an old somewhat bad review that I posted… but we’ve had perfectly reasonable service there since that visit in ’08.]

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OK, maybe I am McDonald’s?

Posted on by Standard 16

Just kidding.  But Harmony and her husband are convinced that I am indeed McDonald’s, and that Harmony is a certified technological genius.  More on that later.

I was convinced by my friends & followers online to write to Mr. Kausky after his suggestion of thanking a soldier for the freedom to choose fast food.  If you have no idea what I’m talking about, you need to read “I AM NOT McDONALD’S” and “I’m still not McDonald’s“.

McDonald's on UrbanspoonAt any rate, this is how I chose to respond to the good-natured manager of the Canonsburg McDonald’s:

From: Waldo Lunar <world.and.lunar.domination@gmail.com>
Date: Wed, Sep 7, 2011
Subject: Re: AiXeLsyD13 / W(aL)D – I’m not McDonald’s
To: Scott Kausky
Cc: pit.05834@us.stores.mcd.com, info@westliberty.mcdtoday.com, sandra.jaeger@gmail.com, krebs955@gmail.com, shovelman11@yahoo.com, pastorskid_tiwtc4u@yahoo.com, Ella.Jones@us.mcd.com, McDonaldsCorporation@mcd.com, McDonalds.CustomerCare@us.mcd.com, kathy.pieroni@us.mcd.com

Hello Mr. Kausky,

Pardon me if I’m misreading the tone of your email, but please calm down.  Have some dip.

My inclusion of you on the original email was because I’ve had pleasant dealings with you & your McDonald’s location in the past.  I’m convinced that you were instrumental in finally getting a response from Ms. Jones the last time I had an issue with the West Liberty Ave. McDonald’s location.  I read you as a man of action, with great pride in your company.

Perhaps you would be better off at a Chick-Fil-A?  They seem to treat their employees better, and you’d never work on Sundays.  You may not be so stressed & jumpy.  Ever notice they always say “My Pleasure” instead of “You’re Welcome” when you thank them?  I can’t decide if it’s awesome, or cult-like.  I’m pretty sure that no one at any McDonald’s ever has acted like it was their pleasure to give me a lopsided cheeseburger.  (Seriously, spot-check that stuff.  I haven’t done a formal study yet, but I’m guessing that 75% of the time, the pickles are stacked on one side of the burger, not placed side-by-side in the middle… and that 95% of the time, there is ketchup and/or mustard on the outside of the bun.)  Although, I have never seen an alarm clock with a subliminal cow penis at McDonald’s… even if you have poorly copied the Chick-fil-A sandwich.

I have four email addresses for people representing the West Liberty Ave. McDonald’s.  None of them have replied to my original email.  This shows lack of pride.  I’m sure you would be disappointed in their lack of response.  That’s…  pit.05834@us.stores.mcd.com, info@westliberty.mcdtoday.com, sandra.jaeger@gmail.com, & Ella.Jones@us.mcd.com.

I’m a concerned citizen, trying to help the confused yet adamant Harmony get in contact with the correct people.  Amber & Shirley need my help too.  Their complaints are valid, and think about this… out of the entire internet that exists out there… these people have managed to find my blog to submit complaints about what I can call possibly the most incompetent McDonald’s location ever.  It’s not their fault that they can’t tell that I am not McDonald’s.

Harmony has her own issues, as she can’t distinguish between an email address and a website… but that doesn’t change the fact that she was not offered a mango pineapple smoothie, and it took 15 minutes to get her additional sandwich and Rolo McFlurry while ¾ of the crew members where congregating by the drive-thru.  (Hopefully they weren’t conjugating… right?)  A mango pineapple smoothie sounds absolutely disgusting, but if Harmony wanted to be offered one that’s her right.

Speaking of rights, I’m not sure how I provoked the antagonistic patriotism and perceived lack of disrespect for our armed forces and freedom.  I apologize if I have offended you in any way.  Were you watching the History channel, election coverage, or perhaps drinking when you received my email?  (I’m not judging, I would imagine one would have to partake in the occasional sip of spirits in order to cope with the stress of running a McDonald’s on top of receiving emails from crazy people.)  

I am indeed glad that I have the freedom to rant about customer service issues and fast food quality on the internet.  You’re right though, I will indeed thank a soldier the next time I see them.  You’ll have to promise to instruct your fellow McDonald’s managers and employees to thank a soldier next time they see them too.  They need to thank them for the freedom to serve poorly constructed sandwiches, cold french fries, and for opportunities to congregate by the drive-thru while paying customers wait (im?)patiently.  While we’re at it, they should thank them for the freedom to dumb-down the populace by changing words like “through” to “thru” and “Night” to “Nite”.  I’m not positive, but I can only assume such offenses would not go unpunished in the former Soviet Union or current Communist blockades like China, one of the Koreas, or Cuba.  I can imagine one being caned in a Singapore McDonald’s for congregating by the drive-thru, or having ketchup fall on the outside of a bun.

At any rate, I would like to share with you my overall adventures in correspondence with McDonald’s.  I hope to amuse and amaze you in chronological order below:

Just so you don’t feel bad, check this one out:  Wendy’s in Dormont (Pittsburgh, PA) – W. LIBERTY #5

I hope you took the time to read all of the comments.  I am not McDonald’s, and I am not alone.  There are more (albeit less electronically vocal) of me out there.  We will not remain silent.  We will continue to consume your poorly assembled meals while grumbling under our breath.  We will contunite to have a mental block when it comes to actual time spent waiting for “fast food” to be prepared & served versus the perceived speed of choosing to dine at such establishments.  We will continue to craft poorly worded and misspelled messages and send them to the wrong people.  We will celebrate the fact that we have the freedom to do all of the above.

So, we have arrived to now.  What’s happening now, is happening now.  I hope you have enjoyed the ride.  Please keep all arms, legs, & other appendages inside the car until it comes to a complete stop.  Thanks for flying W(aL)D Airlines, may the force be with you.  (..and also with you, Amen.)

Your baffled consumer advocate,
-Eric AiXeLsyD
World (and Lunar) Domination

Heh.  I decided to go goofy at the end.  I got his reply, and have decided to leave this poor man alone.  Why?  He actually takes pride in his McDonald’s,  and seems to have a rare killer work ethic:

From: Scott Kausky <skausky33@verizon.net>
Date: Wed, Sep 7, 2011
Subject: Re: AiXeLsyD13 / W(aL)D – I’m not McDonald’s
To: Waldo Lunar <world.and.lunar.domination@gmail.com>

Eric
I didn’t send the email you to upset you either.  I represent my McDonalds.  I was just stating the fact that our soldiers give us the freedom to complain.  I’m old fashioned perhaps, if I continued to have issues, I would simply not return.  Thats how I run my store.  We don’t want them to go else where so we do it right and fix the issues that arrive.  The stores that have issues generally might be due to the town they are in.  I appologize if no one responds to your emails.  All I know for sure is come visit in Canonsburg and I’ll make it right for you.  I enjoy my job and serving our customers.  Please dont use my email for any other reason.

With Respect

Scott Kausky

Respect is right.  Misguided patriotic rants aside, Scott Kausky is the man.  I encourage you to support this McDonald’s location.

We still have the little matter of harmony being convinced that I’m McDonald’s.  You can imagine my surprise as this came to my inbox slightly before Scott’s reply above:

From: krebs955@gmail.com <krebs955@gmail.com>
Date: Wed, Sep 7, 2011
Subject: Re: AiXeLsyD13 / W(aL)D – I’m not McDonald’s
To: Waldo Lunar <world.and.lunar.domination@gmail.com>

I don’t have much to say about all this McDonald’s stuff, because I work at one currently and everybody else has said it. However, I will say that Harmony is my wife and she has no issues whatsoever. The reason we posted on your blog is because it was on the bottom of our receipt. She is not technologically challenged, and shame on you for assuming what other people’s problems and issues are.

Upon the arrival of this gem in my inbox, I was kind of speechless.  I was also paranoid.  Did they indeed pimp my blog’s address at the bottom of a McDonald’s receipt?  I would have declared this an absolute win for Ella Jones, Sandra Jaeger, and everyone else that doesn’t reply to emails at the West Libery Ave. McDonald’s.  I mean, really, how funny would that be?  Along those same lines… if this is a friend or reader yanking my proverbial crank; Kudos!  You totally got me.

If this is for real, then may God have mercy on your souls, …and mine for teasing you.  Can someone please help me explain this?  I thought I did that with my last blog post/email with the lines..

But, I must say that I’m confused.  You didn’t email anyone, you used the contact form at my website: https://aixelsyd13.wordpress.com

Is that what appears at the top of the receipt?

I’m guessing that more than likely it says “ella.jones@us.mcd.com” at the top of your receipt.  I’m not Ella Jones.  You didn’t email me.  You didn’t email Ella Jones.  You did a Google (or Bing) search for the email address, and landed on my page.

McReceipt 09/07/2011

I don't see my email address or blog url on here anywhere. Do you?

Can someone help me simplify that?  Should I even bother at this point?  I’m confused.  Just in case Harmony or her husband find their way back here, I did have to satisfy my curiosity.  I stopped & got two sweet teas tonight, just to get a receipt.  You can seethe full receipt to the left.

It thankfully (and I’ll admit… somewhat disappointingly) does not include my email address or my blog’s web address.

Which one of my theories do you think is the case here?  Do you think they found my blog, & were insulted?  I mean no disrespect.  I’m just trying to help here.  At this point, I’m assuming Shirley and Amber will remain clueless until the end of time.  I have yet to receive a reply from either of them, and doubt I will.  And, I doubt that I’ll ever hear from Ella Jones or Sandra Jaeger.

I also hope that Harmony’s husband doesn’t work at the West Liberty McDonald’s, and that her going online to complain (“complaine”?) about his corporate employer doesn’t cause some sort of marital rift.

Perhaps a visual aid will help demonstrate:

Trust me, I am not McDonald's.

Trust me, I am not McDonald's.

I don’t think I’ll ever convince them.  Think I can get a McDonald’s hat or something?  Maybe a name tag?  Something?  Perhaps I should just start writing back to people pretending that I am indeed McDonald’s.

McDonald's on Urbanspoon To compound & confound even more, this is what happened on my latest adventure into this McDonald’s on a mission to obtain a receipt & ultimately verify that I am not McDonald’s:

I pulled into the parking lot somewhere around 8:30pm and the lot was quite full.  Most of the cars in the lot were at the outer edge, toward the bottom of the lot, and most likely there for Malone’s Too or Señor Frog’s or whatever that bar is called this week… blatantly ignoring the signs to the effect of “McDonald’s Parking Only” or whatever.  I even saw a guy walk out of the bar into his car.  Oh well, that’s not really in their control… or is it?

The drive through lanes were both backed up pretty hard, and I’m sure people were cutting in front of each other unhindered as usual… so I opted to just pull into a parking spot & go inside.  Bad move?  Perhaps.

Once inside, I took my place in line behind a woman and her daughter at the one open/operating register, and a lone dude in front of me.  The woman & daughter were mid-order, and there was something going on about apple pies being dropped (in what I can hopefully assume was the fryer) and only one pie being avaiable.  They were told there would be an approximate 10 minute wait, but that “it goes fast”.  The woman slid to the side as her daughter went to fill their drinks, and I assume find a table.

While this was happening, I saw another McDonald’s employee come up to a register, glance annoyedly at me and the dude in front of me, hit some buttons, then walk away.  I’m sorry.  Do these employees know that to make money, McDonald’s sells what they pass off as food… and that in order to pay her salary they need to sell vast amounts of lopsided hamburgers with ketchup all over the outside of the bun?  I was surprised at how backed up things had become as the drive-through appeared quite frantic & another potential customer came in behind me during a completely non-meal-rush time of day.

Leaving the sole struggling fellow employee at the line register kind of seemed like what I would call a “dick move“.  Alas, the mother moved to the left, and slid her tray containing rapidly cooling french fries along with her.  Up next?  Dude in front of me.

Dude must have also ordered apple pies… as he was told they just dropped.  When he asked what that meant, he was told that it meant there would be a ten minute wait for apple pies.   Was the young lady at the register trying to use a Jedi mind trick to dissuade the man from ordering apple pies?  I’m guessing that she was simply telling a customer that they didn’t want what they ordered.  I honestly don’t know why anyone would want to order one of those nasty mucus-like hot-pockets that are supposed to resemble a pie… but if he was willing to shell out his hopefully hard-earned cash for them, I say give them to the man!  Order begrudgingly placed, and man moves to the left… overcrowding the woman with her lone order of increasingly algid fries.

I was up!  Finally.  I was asked what I wanted to order, I requested two sweet teas.  I was actually told “Oh, thank you for being an easy one” much to the dismay of the dude directly to my left.  He was visibly not amused.  I struggled to internally process what had caused such dismay in the poor girl behind the counter as I was handed my receipt… but I was (and still am) at a loss.

Mission complete.  I had a receipt in my hand.  My name, email address, and blog url are not on the receipt.  Success!  “Just give me my cups” I thought, as the girl walked away.  A kid was leaving his shift… she told him goodbye and proceeded to walk over and talk to the remaining employees about how popular the departing employee was this evening.  It somehow turned into a rant about thinking that someone was going to come through the drive-through window at her.  Perhaps some other unsatisfied customers earlier this evening?

Then one of the other employees told the girl who had taken my order that it was time for her break.  “Break?” she exclaimed, and started to leave.  The one with some semblance of sanity said “but first I need you to take care of all these orders.”

I tried to shift to my left, but apple pie guy was holding his ground as I blatantly invaded his personal space.  Perhaps his movement was hindered by the woman in front of him with ice fries.  The woman behind me was a champion.  She pushed ahead to the register like a metal fan in a mosh pit.  I think her purse touched my bum.  I just want some cups.  The girl who took my order looked at me quizzically.  Perhaps I looked befuddled.  I know where the drink station is.  I know how to get ice.  I know how to work the knob on the iced tea dispenser.  I just need two of those Styrofoam sweet tea cups.  At this point, any cups will do.

Steely in her resolve to go on break, or perhaps obliviously, she took the order of the woman behind me.  Snack wraps.  She broke the code.  No apple pies.  Smart move, purse push lady.  Smart move.  The order was punched in, and she started to yet again walk away.

“C… Can I just have some cups?”  The words were out of my mouth before my brain knew that I was forming them.  I don’t know if I was anxious, or this was my flight response in order to remove myself from the chaos all around me.  The girl who took my order paused, and looked at me.  I’m sure ice fries and pie guy looked at me too, wondering why I should get my hands on some sweet tea before they were handed their precious disgusting pies.  For a split second, I was almost scared.  Had I crossed a line?  Had I invoked the wrath of a McDonald’s employee mere moments late for her break?

Relief.  She grabbed two Styrofoam cups and filled them with ice, then went back to her conversation about the drive through window or something that seemed to annoy her fellow employees.

The girl who had looked at us with disdain earlier while tapping a few buttons on the register reappeared, and asked ice fries what she was waiting for.  Ice fries lady (who’s daughter probably had come to terms by now that she was surely abandoned) said something to the effect of… “I’m waiting for pies, but can I have my sandwiches now, & have someone bring out the pies?”  This was like a record skipping in a TV show.  Several employees stopped and looked at her.  I’m not sure if there was an answer… but I did hear that “the pies would be ten minutes.”  Surely three to five of those ten minutes had already passed, but who was I to argue?

“Hooolllly coooowww!”  I did it again.  The words escaped me before I could contain them.  Damn you, Ernie and the Berts practice, for amping me all up.  By this point, I was looking around for hidden cameras.  Was I on a TV show?  I think I heard pie guy say “I know” but perhaps he feared the wrath of a pie-less future as it was almost imperceptible.

I was handed my iced teas… I’m guessing the tea dispensers over by the pop machines aren’t filled at night?  Makes sense.  Even though there was one of me and I ordered two drinks…  I wasn’t offered a drink carrier.  I wasn’t handed straws or napkins.  I sure as heck wasn’t going to ask for any.

I hastily made my was over to the condiment & drink station, got some straws & napkins, then walked back past the counter to the exit, ice fries, pie guy, and snack wrap lady still there… probably envious of my escape to sweet freedom.

I couldn’t help it.  As I walked by, I muttered a sing-song like “♪♫ Good luuu-uuck… ♪♫” to my fellow McConsumers.  I hope they were amused.

Eu não sou McDonald’s. Ich bin nicht McDonald’s. Io non sono McDonald’s. Jag är inte McDonalds. Je ne suis pas McDonald’s. Jeg er ikke McDonalds. Mimi si McDonald ya. Nem vagyok McDonald’s. Nid wyf yn McDonald’s. Nie jestem McDonalda. Níl mé McDonald’s ar. Non est McDonald’s. Yo no soy McDonald. Δεν είμαι της McDonald’s. Я не Макдональдс. אני לא מקדונלד ‘ס. मैं मैकडॉनल्ड्स नहीं हूँ. 저는 맥도날드 아닙니다. 我不是麦当劳。 私はマクドナルドではない。

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I’m still not McDonald’s.

Posted on by Standard 16

The McDouble, a cheeseburger from McDonald's.

Image via Wikipedia

Have you heard that I’m not McDonald’s?  I decided to write to my new friends in McNeed, and I got a great response out of Harmony.  She is apparently convinced that I am McDonald’s.  I got a somewhat puzzling response from Scott, the manager of the Canonsburg store.  I’ll share what’s transpired.  This is me, trying to clear up the message…

From: Waldo Lunar <world.and.lunar.domination@gmail.com>
Date: Thu, Sep 1, 2011
Subject: AiXeLsyD13 / W(aL)D – I’m not McDonald’s
To: krebs955@gmail.com, shovelman11@yahoo.com, pastorskid_tiwtc4u@yahoo.com
Cc: pit.05834@us.stores.mcd.com, Ella Jones <Ella.Jones@us.mcd.com>, info@westliberty.mcdtoday.com, sandra.jaeger@gmail.com, skausky33@verizon.net

Hello Harmony, Shirley, & Amber,

 Thank you for taking the time to write to me!  While I understand your frustrations with your McDonald’s visits, I have to say… I am not McDoanld’s.

 I’m not sure how you all arrived at using the contact form for my website whilst thinking the message was going to McDonald’s.  While I applaud your vigor, it is sadly misdirected.  I do however feel that it would be an injustice if I left the messages fall upon deaf ears (or blind eyes as it were).  So, I am copying this message to the known addresses of several people representing the McDonald’s location on West Liberty Avenue in Dormont.  Hopefully they will follow-up with you directly about your respective incidents; runny oatmeal, lack of napkins & ketchup, lackadaisical manager (Jeff), and all.  Chaos apparently still abounds at this location.  It’s been quite some time since I have been there.

If you’d like to know what I’m talking about, or where this email is from… I encourage you to check out my blog:  I AM NOT McDONALD’S.  It also contains other avenues to explore (namely Twitter) should this email prove to be no help.

Until then, since the nearby Wendy’s is under construction and possibly worse than this McDonald’s, I encourage you to try Dormont Dogs, SLICE on Broadway, or Tom’s Diner.

Good luck in your journey form consumer advocacy to customer satisfaction, may you be amused along the way, & find what you’re looking for eventually.  Consider me your GPS.

 Don’t argue with the Garmin,
-ERiC AiXeLsyD
World (and Lunar) Domination

Simple enough, right?  Harmony is not convinced:

From: krebs955@gmail.com <krebs955@gmail.com>
Date: Thu, Sep 1, 2011
Subject: Re: AiXeLsyD13 / W(aL)D – I’m not McDonald’s
To: Waldo Lunar <world.and.lunar.domination@gmail.com>

That is interesting since your e-mail address is on the receipts there lol.

It was almost immediately followed by this:

From: krebs955@gmail.com <krebs955@gmail.com>
Date: Thu, Sep 1, 2011
Subject: Re: AiXeLsyD13 / W(aL)D – I’m not McDonald’s
To: Waldo Lunar <world.and.lunar.domination@gmail.com>

Thanks for the helpful info though.

Can someone get me a receipt from that place, just so I can be sure?  I’m guessing that Harmony is using a phone, and thought she emailed Ella Jones… & didn’t realize she was using my contact form.

I’ve had positive interactions with Mr. Kausky before.  Apparently my repeated use of “I am not McDonald’s” pushed a button.

From: Scott Kausky <skausky33@verizon.net>
Date: Wed, Aug 31, 2011
Subject: Re: AiXeLsyD13 / W(aL)D – I’m not McDonald’s
To: Waldo Lunar <world.and.lunar.domination@gmail.com>

Dear Sir,

I am also NOT MCDONALD’S.   I do however, represent the Canonsburg McDonald’s.  I can assist you with anything from that perspective.  I might suggest however, to take the time and thank a soldier that gives us the freedom to criticize in the land of the free and be thankful that we can peacefully drive down the street and stop by and pick up a quick meal if one so desires.

 Thank You.

Scott is apparently unamused by my insolence.  The reason I copied him is that he’s the only one who gave a response before, and seems to actually take pride in his store.  I believe it also helped get a response from Ms. Jones.

I don’t know where thanking a soldier came into play.  I never voiced any disrespect for the government or military.  Both of my grandfathers fought in WWII, my dad served in the army, and I have uncles that served in the Marines & Air Force… as well as many other friends & extended family members who have served in active duty much more recently.  I appreciate all of their service, and the fact that I’m here and able to whine about the quality of fast food service because of them.

If we’re invoking patriotism inappropriately here: Maybe the next time a McDonald’s employee is screwing up an order, they should thank a soldier that they have the freedom to screw up that order.

I haven’t written back to Mr. Kausky yet, but I did fire this off to Harmony & company:

From: Waldo Lunar <world.and.lunar.domination@gmail.com>
Date: Thu, Sep 1, 2011
Subject: Re: AiXeLsyD13 / W(aL)D – I’m not McDonald’s
To: “krebs955@gmail.com” <krebs955@gmail.com>
Cc: shovelman11@yahoo.com, pastorskid_tiwtc4u@yahoo.com, pit.05834@us.stores.mcd.com, Ella Jones <Ella.Jones@us.mcd.com>, info@westliberty.mcdtoday.com, sandra.jaeger@gmail.com, skausky33@verizon.net

Hello again Harmony,

No problem for the contact info, good luck in your quest for customer satisfaction!

But, I must say that I’m confused.  You didn’t email anyone, you used the contact form at my website: https://aixelsyd13.wordpress.com

Is that what appears at the top of the receipt?

I’m guessing that more than likely it says “ella.jones@us.mcd.com” at the top of your receipt.  I’m not Ella Jones.  You didn’t email me.  You didn’t email Ella Jones.  You did a Google (or Bing) search for the email address, and landed on my page.

If it does say “https://aixelsyd13.wordpress.com” at the top of a McDonald’s receipt, I’d love to see a photo of that.

Rock on!
-Eric

No response as of yet from Harmony, Shirley, or Amber (who all thought or still think that I was/am McDonald’s) …and of course as expected no response (to me anyway) from Ella Jones, Sandra Jaeger, Rick Sapko, or anyone representing the West Liberty Ave. McDonald’s.

Should I write back to Scott & try to clear things up?  Should I leave well enough alone?  I know that pressing Sandra, Ella, & Rick will get me nowhere.

Related articles

I AM NOT McDONALD’S

Posted on by Standard 26

I am not McDonald’s.  I’m just sayin’.  This isn’t the 1st time this has happened.  I got this message in my inbox today:

From: Harmony Krebs <krebs955@gmail.com>
To: me_at_my@email.addre.ss
Sent: Wednesday, August 31, 2011 6:59 PM
Subject: W(aL)D Feedback

Name: Harmony Krebs

Email: krebs955@gmail.com

Website:

Message / Comment: First, the oatmeal was filled to the top with water and extremely runny. The order taker didn’t offer a mango pineapple smoothie, and when I went back up to order an additional sandwich and small rolo mcflurry, it took 15 minutes to get them. There was only one guy taking orders, while 3/4 of the crew members were over by the drive through just talking and congregating.

How’d you find my blog?: It was on my receipt.

Time: Wednesday August 31, 2011 at 6:59 pm

IP Address: ##.###.##.###

Contact Form URL: https://aixelsyd13.wordpress.com/contact/

Sent by an unverified visitor to your site.

Odd.  You may remember this gem:

From: shirley kelly
To: me_at_my@email.addre.ss
Sent: Tuesday, August 2, 2011 7:33 PM
Subject: W(aL)D Feedback

Name: shirley kelly

Email: shovelman11@yahoo.com

Website:

Message / Comment: went in Imperial store on Aug. i,2011, the service was horrible . They acted  as if they were doing us  a favor by waiting on us .There were no napkinks out , no containers for ketchup  both myself and  another had to ask for napkins,  when they gave them to us  it was like an effort to do so  The management at night is horrible

How’d you find my blog?:

Time: Tuesday August 2, 2011 at 7:33 pm

IP Address: ###.###.###.###

Contact Form URL: https://aixelsyd13.wordpress.com/contact/

Sent by an unverified visitor to your site.

Really weird.  I AM NOT MCDOANLD’S.  I think I see what’s happening here, at least with the message up top.  See if you can follow along with me…

  1. Where I started my “WTF?” journey was the line “How’d you find my blog?: It was on my receipt.”  Um, I highly doubt that https://aixelsyd13.wordpress.com was on your receipt.  So, we go to the next step…
  2. The WordPress stats page is awesome.  The only McDonald’s-related search term that landed someone on my blog today was “ella.jones@us.mcd.com“.  Avid readers know that Ms. Jones’ email address does indeed appear at the top of a receipt.
  3. What we’ve learned is that Ms. Krebs above has typed “ella.jones@us.mcd.com” into Google, and discovered my blog.  Luckily for Ms. Jones, the 1st for things that pop up (today anyway) send people to my blog.
  4. Here is where we have to make some educated guesses.
    1. Ms. Krebs thought that all my ramblings about McDonald’s were some sort an official complaint form.
    2. Ms. Krebs is unable to distinguish a web browser from a mail client (or webmail, as it is a Gmail address), or an email address from a URL, which could break down (even further) to…
      1. She thought ella.jones@us.mcd.com was a url, and the contact form on my site was to contact McDonald’s.
      2. She thought that by typing the email address “ella.jones@us.mcd.com” into the Google or Bing search bar, she was indeed sending an email.
    3. Ms. Krebs thought she was commenting on my blog, & instead of using the “Leave a Reply” box at the bottom, she hit the contact link at the top.
    4. Ms. Krebs has a Smartphone, and no idea how to use it.

That was fun, wasn’t it?  Do you think I’m close?  I may have to change to look of my comment page to let people know who I am, and that I am not McDoanld’s.

I do love the interaction.  As a blogger I feed off of comments, replies, and feedback.  I do appreciate & empathize that you were so wronged by McDonald’s that you feel the need to express your frustrations via written electronic communication.  I totally get that.

If you have had a bad experience, and want to vent… please, I encourage you to share the experience (hopefully with a humorous bent) here with me & all the other people who’s McDonald’s-related Google and Bing searches have led them to my humble corner of the internet.

That being said, there are a plethora of comments on my blog: A day in the life of McDonald’s #5834 (West Liberty Ave. – Brookline/Beechview/Dormont)

A lot of those comments seem to be directed at McDonald’s.  I am not McDonald’s.  I try to reply to each commenter to let them know where to direct their anger… but they must not have checked the “Notify me of follow-up comments via email” box while they commented or ever check back, because they never seem to get my reply.

Wow.  As, I’m typing this blog… I got something in my inbox that is so amusing I’m going to pee my pants:

From: Amber Ross <pastorskid_tiwtc4u@yahoo.com>
To: me_at_my@email.addre.ss
Sent: Wednesday, August 31, 2011 10:01 PM
Subject: W(aL)D Feedback

Name: Amber Ross

Email: pastorskid_tiwtc4u@yahoo.com

Website:
Message / Comment: Hello, i would like to inform you that i have visited your store twice today and both times the service has been extremely slow and very disappointing.  Both times i have waited twenty minutes in line and both times it was for something small. The line had at least eight people in it, that were not helped and the manager (Jeff) was at the drive thru window drinking a pop and not caring that people were waiting. i also would like to inform you that i will not be returning to your store along with my entire family. Thank You.

How’d you find my blog?:

Time: Wednesday August 31, 2011 at 10:01 pm

IP Address: ##.###.##.###

Contact Form URL: https://aixelsyd13.wordpress.com/contact/

Sent by an unverified visitor to your site.

Seriously?  Is someone playing a joke on me, or is my website really at the top of McDonald’s receipts?  Ha ha.

I hope your disgruntled McSearch leads you here, because, I’d like to let you know that (say it with me)…

I am not McDonald’s.

If you would like to read my McDonald’s-related ramblings, may I suggest the following?

If you’d like to contact McDonald’s, there’s a myriad of ways you can do so, although I cannot guarantee you a satisfying reply (or a reply at all):

McDonald’s #5834 (West Liberty Ave.):

McDonald’s #4856 (Canonsburg):

The McDonald’s Twitter Team plus a few more:

Here are even more contacts, gathered from my Comments:

Oh man, I forgot about this genius:

jeffrey s miller jr | December 17, 2010 at 12:51 am | Reply | Edit

I was very unhappy with my visit from store 10848 delmont 6526 route 22 pa the servise was the worrise that i ever had and i had only had three things two frys and a fish sandwitch and i had a pice of chees on mu fish and the frys where cold and when i asked for ketchup they said i had to pay for it pleas email me back or i will call and complaine

Jeffrey; I am not McDonald’s.  While we’re at it… “sandwitch” & “complaine“?  …and “worrise“?  You clearly have issues to address, my friend.  Best of luck with that.

Wow.

Please, share your experience below (but, note… again, that I am not McDonald’s)!

I’d also love any theories on how/why peopel are using my contact form and comments sections… thinking I’m McDonalds.  (Which I’m clearly not.)

Related articles

I am computer smart & very good with organization.

Posted on by Standard 8

Worst resume ever?  Perhaps.  It’s pretty funny though… so maybe if the writer can harness the chaos, it can be put to good use.  I wish I could take credit for writing or even finding this, but I can’t.  It comes from a note posted on Facebook by my good friend Mike.  I asked him if I could steal it to share with a wider audience, and he agreed that it’s too good to not be shared.

So, grab a cup of coffee, and pretend you’re looking to hire someone…

[Mike’s forward: This comes from my pal at a local coffee shop. This kid came in and insisted on including this resume with his application. I have not edited it for content, spelling or punctuation aside from anything containing his personal info. Have fun!!]

 Resume of, AUTHOR.

 Address: (Something, Pittsburgh PA 15219.)

 Best way to contact: E-Mail.(email@college.edu.)

 Attending college at: (College.)

 Major of study: (Graphic Design, moving up to Game & Art Design.)

 Degree earning: (Bachelor’s Degree, “4 years.”)

 Years done so far out of 4: (almost a full 2 years total.)

 Skill’s & Talent’s, which PERSON can bring to this job offer, is as followed:

  • I have both my Adobe & Microsoft skills.
  • I wield the knowledge & understanding on, how to properly function these programs.
  • I am computer smart & very good with organization.
  • I am a hard worker & I get stuff done right the first time around.
  • I am very well, at English & speaking.
  • I understand details very quickly & fluently as well.

 I take direction extremely well & work as hard as I can, in order to guarantee success at whatever it is I am presently doing.

  • I am a team player & can be greatly independent upon my efforts put fourth in my work too.
  • I can give great advice to fellow students, if I do not know an answer to a question I will first try to see if I can figure it out, or guide them to the correct person in position to answer their questions.
  • I am passionate at everything I do, I never waste time I work first & leave the relaxing time for when it can be enjoyed without consequence.  

Background & Job qualifications.

You are probably asking yourself:  

  • “Why should I consider hiring, this college student?
  • What makes him, stand out more than any other college student. who may be applying?
  • Does he have the ambition & determination, to follow through with this job position?
  • Will he ever fail me, or let me down in anyway imaginable?
  • Can he be trusted & reliable, to do this type of work?  

” These are all very good questions & I can inform security, that I can honestly answer them all, both correctly & factually, while backing up everything I am about to explain with evidence. ”  

  • I feel you should consider my employment, cause I am a working type of person almost 95 percent of my time, my life is what I do, in this cause art & employment, I seem to never stop moving or working on something important, while others party with friends I am either figuring out life arrangements, school finances & study, or just creating neat art, cause that’s what I came to an art college for.

I believe what makes me stand out, is my never give up attitude, my spunky side which shines through as a bubbly personality, my humor can be a personality trait in particular settings, I naturally love people & always give my all & best to help them, I would give a homeless guy the remaining dollar in my wallet & I have done that a lot, so I just believe with every good employee, comes a caring strong individual. I am a determined student, with one option only, success. Failure is a given, but I never allow it, it will never be3 a option for me, if I want this dream career & lifestyle I have to want it, I have to live it & most importantly I have to fight for it full throttle. I brought my GPA up this quarter from a 1.7 now is at a peaking 2.4 /2.5 & there are still a few grades that need to placed in their, but I know how I did by communicating with my professors, it will at least be a 2.5 if anything. I can guarantee excellent & efficient work ethic, delivered daily without any questions ask. I am up for change, so if details in the work environment turn to the left or to the right I am on the ball & never respond negatively to a changed course or daily pattern. I am a Full-Time Student, at the COLLEGE, in the Graphic Design Program (Bachelors Degree.) I came for Game & art Design. though my art work from high school, passed in insanely well, my mathematics’ is what I am working on in order to move up & soon enough I will do just that.  

Personal Cover Letter.

I am a very determined person. I believe in promotion, even where it seems, down right impossible. I believe anyone of us, can succeed at what we dream. It’s not where you come from, that makes who you are today, It is what you went through & how you handled it, in order to get to where you are today. I do not believe in using your pass negative experiences, as an alibi, nor do I agree with, failure being an option. I came from a rough life, beofre I became the young successful man I am today. I was the boy on the streets, the boy with no father or mother, nor anyone to love him. I came from Foster Cares, an endless amount & I went through life’s tragedies at an early age. Though my life was difficult, I still dreamed of a brighter tomorrow, with that said, I always said I BELIEVE. I never listened, when family & outsiders use to say, give up that’s a fairy tale dream-life it will never happened I still held my head high & believed, their must be more to this world Everyone can not simply be this horrid, their must be a better life, out there just waiting around the bend, sure enough after 17 to 18 years of my life, I found out that I was in fact very correct. There was a dream-life outside of tragedy & despair & that’s what I found today, for 2 years right out of high school I jumped on the college bandwagon & never stepped off since, still dealing with tragedies sure we always will, but I deal with them, get through them, the mature way, the professional way & I still do what my work & schooling expects of me.

I did have a part time job at the local Dunkin’ Donuts, but ran into, some scheduling details that weren’t that well explained in this case, every week was a new schedule & it began to confuse many employees working on the site. I worked as a very hard worker for a solid month, to the point that, the Assistant Manager taking over soon, said I wish I was in charge right now cause you would still be my employee, he apologized & said you the only one here who cleans, closes & runs this shop like a professional & to the book, like me, everyone else seems to slide on through & slack off, he said my apologize. This was very difficult it hurt very badly to where I cried a bit, I never been rejected in that fashion, so I think we all, get that wake up call, that proves to us even if your doing everything in your power to be the best employee, sometimes life still happens, all we can do is cry, move on & change for the better in the end I am also applying for 2 part times or one Full time position this quarter I have to find a place to live come September 1h & I expect to be okay, come fall something tells me I will. I guarantee, though I work part time, I will have more than enough time to work for you, this is without questioning, I would have never applied if I couldn’t bring the goods to the table, trust me. Many days I sit bored in a dorm silly, cause I don’t work that day or classes are finished, so I have all the time in the world I am a hard worker & I believe living life to it’s fullest, takes effort in order to receive it’s glory

Did he get the job?  Please, share your thoughts!  I’d also love to know how much of this was put through Google Translate.  Think any of it was?  I hope some of it was, anyway.

What’s your favorite line?  There are so many good ones!  This should replace the standard lourem ipsum.

Furniture Follow-Up and Fallout

Posted on by Standard 2

So,did you read the couch-buying blog and see the couches?  I did get some follow up from both sides.  You can see some in the comments section of the original blog, and I’d like to share some here…

I sent this to DFW via their contact form…

Comment: Hello,

I wanted to write to let you know that my wife & I had an excellent experience with store manager Matt Walker at DFW in Pittsburgh earlier this evening.  We left a Value City nearby wholly disgusted with their salesperson, and our experience at DFW was such a great relief.

I blogged about my experience here:  http://wp.me/pwqzc-y2

Please pass my praise on to Matt and his boss.  I hope that such excellent service is rewarded!

Thank you for your time,
-Eric
.seitilibasid gninrael fo nuf ekam ot ynnuf ton yllaer s’tI

(Contents of my blog below for your convenience…)

…and got this back:

From: Andrew Robinson <arobinson2255@gmail.com>
To: eric_aixelsyd@yahoo.com
Sent: Mon, April 25, 2011 8:11:15 AM
Subject: Re: Contact Form

Eric. Thanks for taking the time to share your experience. We hope you don’t mind, but we have posted a link to your blog on our Facebook page.

PS. We are giving away a FREE sectional on our facebook fan page.   http://www.facebook.com/DFWFurniture#!/DFWFurniture?sk=app_121121694568521   just “like” DFW to enter….

On Sat, Apr 23, 2011 at 1:41 AM, CustomerSupport <sales@dfwfurniture.com> wrote:

It made their Facebook page too!  They have a pretty cool blog if you’re in the market for some new furniture.

Here’s the post in question… if you follow, them please “Like” it or leave a comment:  http://www.facebook.com/DFWFurniture/posts/110773852342054

Even better, Bethany’s on their email list, and this was in her inbox today:  http://us2.campaign-archive2.com/?u=66b31c192a78cb1962439b620&id=58954895aa&e=fed37b6f6a

Just part of the email…

…but we want to encourage  feedback and interaction from the community on Facebook.

Example : The recent story from Eric in Pittsburgh about his shopping experience at Value City Furniture vs. DFW Furniture in Pittsburgh.

We realize that advertising is always SUSPECT…But customer testimonials are PRICELESS… and credible.

How awesome is that?!  I’m famous!  Ha ha.

In all fairness, Value City did indeed reach out in the comments of the original blog, and as requested… I did follow-up:

From: Eric Carroll
To: jeremy.sipes@vcf.com
Sent: Mon, April 25, 2011
Subject: Blog about couch buyin experience…

Hello Mr. Snipes,

I’m responding to your comment on my blog.  I’m not sure what else you would need detail-wise, or any way of resolving anything.  Did you first read about my blog through your submission form?   I don’t really have any other details then what I expressed in my blog.  What else would you be looking for, exactly?

Thanks,
-Eric

.seitilibasid gninrael fo nuf ekam ot ynnuf ton yllaer s’tI

And, this was the response:

From: “Jeremy.Sipes@americansignature.com”
To: Eric Carroll
Sent: Tue, April 26, 2011
Subject: Re: Blog about couch buying experience…

I just wanted to make sure to reach out to you regarding your experience in the store. I apologize for your experience with one of our sales people. I will be in contact with store management in order to address your concerns. I am glad that you found furniture that you are happy with, it is just unfortunate that you were not able to so with our store.

If you need anything going forward, please don’t hesitate to contact me.

Thanks for your time

Jeremy Sipes
American Signature Inc.
Customer Service Coordinator
1-800-743-4577
1-614-449-4351

Again, there’s not too much to do at this point, is there?  Although, they did have some cool pop-bottle looking bar-stools there…

Heh.  Twitter is also a powerful tool:

http://twitter.com/#!/dfwfurniture/status/62486421889486848

http://twitter.com/#!/ValueCityFurn/status/62885704874721281

http://twitter.com/#!/ValueCityFurn/status/62885852690399234

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Couches

Posted on by Standard 1

Well, if you read about our couch buying experience and were at all curious, here are some crappy photos from my cell phone:

New Couch

Klaussner Couch

New Love Seat

Klaussner Love Seat

I like they stripey pillows on the love seat, they came with the set. I don’t think Bethany likes ’em though. We bought the pillows that are on the couch from Kohl’s, but they’re a pretty good match.

Adventures in Couch-Buying

Posted on by Standard 14

So, the wife & I been saving to buy a new couch & loveseat for quite a while. We’ve been very casually looking at furniture stores since last October.  Retail sales people in general really bother me.  I tense up when they approach.  It’s impossible to walk into any furniture store & browse without a sales person being on you like white on rice.  I have an issue with the titles too.  They never call themselves sales people.  It’s always “associate” or “specialist” or “floor manager” or “Archduke of Ass-cushions”.  You’re there to sell furniture and make commission, not to help me with the interior design in my house or really even to sell me what fits my needs.  You want to up-sell as much as possible.  I know that, you know that… why can’t you admit that you know I know it?  Pardon me, I’m getting ahead of myself.

At Levin’s they weren’t interested in showing us anything other than the most expensive couches.  Once they got an idea of our budget, they weren’t interested.  Roomful Express was a veritable pressure cooker with a “buy it now because we’re going out of business” style sales pitch.  So, no warranty then?  Ikea is great, and we love the place for other reasons, but none of the couches that we saw on our last few trips fit our style and budget.  Big Lots had some affordable furniture, but the couch we had considered there only came in one awful orange-tinted brown… and it just brought poop to mind.

That brings us to the events of tonight.  We had passed by the DFW on Rte. 51 a week or so ago, but we decided to check it out.  We had looked at a few of their pieces online and were happy with the price & selection.  We decided to stop at Value City first since it was on the way & we were out looking.  The plan was to look around at Value City, check DFW in person, and if we needed to hit Value City on the way home, we could do that.  We could not have had two more divergent experiences.  I will mention sales persons’ names below, as it’s my intent to contact both Value City & DFW with the details of our experiences.  They both need to know what’s going on in their stores, good & bad.

As we were walking up to the door at Value City, we could see a young sales guy looking out the front window directly at us as if we couldn’t also see him.  He ran out of our view to his left, not unlike a puppy running to get some treats.  I said to Bethany “Wow, this guy’s going to be all over us before we’re even in the door.”  I was wrong.  Another sales guy was on us as soon as we were in the door.  He appeared like Batman disappears in the movies & cartoons.  I really have no idea where this guy came from.  He was just there.  I say “sales guy”, but he called himself a “floor designer”, commented on Bethany’s Penguins hoodie, and introduced himself as Bill.  Bill asked what we were looking for, we said couches, and he gave is a well-rehearsed (read: tired) spiel about how we were “here for two things; eye appeal and butt appeal”.  Things like “it’s got to be comfortable”, “sit on it, jump on it, relax”, “microfiber is just a fancy way of saying 100% polyester” were said.  Also, there were mentions of how their parent company owns Big Lots and DHL and a few other companies… which have absolutely no bearing on me buying furniture.  I’m not impressed with image.  Cheesy, but at that, he let us off to browse on our own.  We made our way up the first aisle, down the second, and were on the way up the third when Bill caught us again.  Along the way, we saw two couch/loveseat sets that we really considered purchasing.  We had our mind set on one because it was comfortable and within our budget and we were frankly just in the mood to finally purchase a couch this evening.  When Bill caught up to us the second time, we may have confused him, as we talked in passing to another family who had just walked in the front door.  Bill proceeded to introduce himself to us and give the same “eye appeal and rear appeal” into the “microfiber=polyester” speech that we had just heard less than ten minutes earlier.  As we were just into the third aisle, we were beginning to realize that most of this furniture was above our budget… so the plan was to walk through quickly.  Bill caught us by a rather ugly yet comfy reclining sofa that was ridiculously priced and begged us to sit in it.  We obliged.  Then Bill proceeded to tell is that we may recognize him from TV as he’s the “furniture doctor” (or something to that effect) on KDKA.  He also said that he sold this same couch to Tyler Kennedy & Max Talbot, then named some Steelers for good measure.  This is where my mind was made up that we wouldn’t be buying anything from Value City.  I don’t care who else has the same couch as me, and these local sports heroes will never be sitting on my couch… so it really is irrelevant.  Also… I know you shouldn’t judge a book by its cover, but just looking at us, he should have known that the couch in question was way out of our price range.  I would like to make it clear that the only reason that we didn’t buy a couch from Value City this evening is Bill Crewson.  I found him to be pretentious, pompous, and obnoxious.  We escaped Bill’s sales pitch of doom, and had a discussion around the first corner.  My wife agreed with my assessment and decided that worst-case scenario, we would come back & deal with a different sales associate because Bill was not getting a dime of commission from us.  We promptly headed to the door.  Bill again appeared out of nowhere and handed us a business card as we were on the way out the door, title being “Home Furnishing Consultant”.  Get your title/position straight, Bill.  Consistency is a good thing.  As soon as we got home, I fired up Firefox and Googled the bejesus out of Bill’s name on KDKA’s website.  I can find no mention of Bill by name or by “furniture doctor” or “couch doctor” or whatever he called himself (or anywhere else on the web).  If someone knows Tyler Kennedy or Max Talbot, tell them to call me to talk about their couches.

Next, we went to DFW.  The experience there was as refreshing as Value City was exasperating.  We weren’t immediately pounced upon when we walked in the door.  After we had made our was across the front of the store, we were casually approached by a Mr. Matt Walker.  He asked us what we wanted, and what our needs were.  He explained what they had, how the discounts worked if you bought outright vs. a payment plan, and set us free to roam around the store.  Still reeling from Value City, I thanked Matt for being the first sales person in a furniture store that wasn’t so far up my rear-end that they were looking out my mouth.  He laughed like he hears that a lot.  Bethany & I were able to take our time, look at the prices, sit on the couches… and we again found two sets that we liked and that fit our budget.  The one didn’t come in any different colors, so we happily picked the other, and we had to seek out Matt to let him know that we were ready to make a purchase.  To not be hovered over, or approached a second time with some sort of practiced sales pitch, or to not be only shown the most expensive pieces on the floor was a huge deal.  Happily, the set we wanted was well under budget at the advertised price.  Not only that, but we got a discount for paying for it all at once.  There was also another deeper discount because the floor model was the only one left.  We looked it over, were satisfied with the condition and quality and went with it.  We did purchase a reasonably priced protection plan for the cushions and there was a standard delivery fee… and we were still under the advertised price for the set.  I urge anyone in the Pittsburgh area looking for cheap quality furniture to seek out Matt Walker (Store Manager) at DFW on Rte. 51.  DFW should send all of their managers and sales persons to Matt to be trained.  They would be wise to pick up his tactics and demeanor.  The delivery is set for tomorrow, I’ll have to pop up a photo and let you know how that goes!

Tyson Foods, Inc. & Willie Barber FTW.

Posted on by Standard 4

Yesterday, I got two surprises in our mailbox… One being that half of it was our neighbor’s mail, and the other being the promised letter & coupons from Mrs. Barber at Tyson  Foods!  OK, the mail mix-up wasn’t that big of a surprise… that happens at least 4 times a week.  It’s always good to get mail that’s not bills or junk mail though, and this made my day…

Tyson Foods - LetterSeems a little stiff compared to my earlier exchanges, but form letters are a necessary evil with a company as large as Tyson I guess.

Also enclosed were five  coupons for free Tyson Foods items!  Two coupons for one free bag of Tyson Frozen Breaded Product or Any’tizers Product, one for any one package of Tyson Individually Frozen Chicken Product, one for any one package of Tyson Wright Brand, and one for any one package of Wright Brand Product… which makes some awesome bacon.

Tyson coupons

This is much much more than I expected, or could have hoped for!  Really, it all started out as goofing around, not a complaint by any means.  It’s certainly better than the paltry pile of coupons that I received from Pillsbury when asking about funding further “how many pizza rolls can really fit in the microwave at once” research.  I let the ball drop on that one… perhaps I better write to them and ask again, using Tyson and Taco Bell as references of good coupon giving.

I’ll have to write back to Willie to say thanks.  This really was quite generous, and will certainly help in stretching the food budget in the coming weeks!