I’ve noticed a trend of people leaving early at punk rock shows and at hockey games.  I’m sure it’s happening other places too. It’s glaringly obvious that as a society our attention spans are shortening while our focus hones in on our own satisfaction.  I guess I’ll have to give into the trend.

Here’s my list of more suggested places to leave early…

1. When Dining Out – Order something you don’t like for dessert, then leave before it gets there because you don’t want it anyway.  Brave diners can also skip paying the bill.
2. The Doctor’s Office – No clocks in the waiting room?  Making you routinely wait for an hour later than your scheduled appointment time, yet whining if you’re 10 minutes late?  Leave before the doctor gets there, you probably don’t want to hear the results anyway.
3. The Movies – They’re all remakes any more anyway.  Haven’t you already seen this?  You know how it’s going to end.  Chances are you’re texting or even talking on your phone the whole time anyway.
4. Church – Just getting in the door counts, right?  Leave before all that pesky sermon about morals and other nonsense… and get to the local diner/brunch buffet before everyone else!
5. Work – Eight hours?  That’s just crazy.

Have any more suggestions?

What the hell is this?

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