Italian …Subwich? Submursible?


This is becoming a trend. I want to make a sandwich and don’t have the appropriate bread or bun. Thankfully, this lack of planning for a meatball sub brought forth the almighty Meatball Club (the Meatball Melt isn’t bad either). This was not a bad alternative, if I do say so myself.

Did you get yourself a The Meatball Club T-shirt yet? Maybe I should trademark that.

I made some of my grilled chicken noodle soup that we had with a salad for dinner last night. I had some leftovers for lunch today and wanted a lil’ sandwich to go with it. Not much beats a local mom n’ pop pizza shop Italian Sub. I had some almost sort of close enough ingredients in the house, so I crafted my own.

In my humble opinion, the key to a great local sub shop Italian Sub is the toasting. The second key is to call it a sub and not a hoagie, grinder, hero or whatever other word yinz have for it. Maybe this would be less a Subwich and more a Submersible?

I didn’t have a sub roll, but I did have the super cheap hamburger buns. That worked, because it was lunch time and I didn’t need a foot long sandwich anyway.

A grilled Italian Sub sandwich made on a toasted burger bun, sitting atop a white plate, featuring melted cheese and ridiculous meats.
The Italian …Subwich?

Here’s what I did…

I preheated the oven to 400ยฐ and gathered all my stuff.

I melted some butter & EVOO with garlic powder, onion powder, & Italian seasoning in the microwave in a microwave safe bowl.

I spread the butter on the insides of the bun, sprinkled on a tiny bit of shake cheese, and toasted it inside up in the oven for 5 minutes on a sheet pan.

I took it out and poured some Sweet Italian Dressing on the inside of both buns.

I stacked the cold cuts, cheese, & veggies like this from the bottom up on the bottom bun: Turkey, hard salami, provolone cheese, ham, hard salami, jarred roasted red peppers, sliced black olives, shredded Parmesan from a tub,

I put a slice of provolone on the inside of the top bun.

I put it back in the oven for 6 minutes.

I took it out & assembled the sandwich.

I brushed a little more melted butter/spices on the top, and put it back in… this time on convection at 350ยฐ for two minutes because why not?

I bought it out and it definitely gave me mom n’ pop pizza shop vibes. Those slightly burnt edges make it kick.

My wife likes the Roasted Red Pepper Italian dressing & some mayo on hers. If you’re going to comment that you don’t like back olives, can’t eat roasted red peppers, or would add onions, lettuce, & tomato… I’ll lift the weight off of your shoulders and ask how you’d make this yours?

If you are here to say bread, meat, or cheese are not for you and/or ask what you can substitute, I’ll say “Bean Soup” to you.

I asked Gemini to pull out an ingredient list, and it did this whole ass thing, so I’ll paste it all below for the “jump to the recipe” crowd. It’s funny how it says to slice the bun like this isn’t the ~$1 pack of 8 from Aldi. It does know what “shake cheese” is though. Do other people call it that, or just me? It adds some wild stuff all inferred from my text above.

Ingredients

This is for one sandwich, but is easily scalable for a crowd!

The Butter Brush & Dressing

  • 1 Sub Bun (or your favorite hoagie roll)
  • 2 Tbsp Butter (unsalted or salted)
  • 1 Tbsp Extra Virgin Olive Oil (EVOO)
  • 1/2 tsp Garlic Powder
  • 1/2 tsp Onion Powder
  • 1/2 tsp Italian Seasoning
  • 2-3 Tbsp Sweet Italian Dressing (or another vinaigrette of your choice)
  • 1-2 tsp “Shake Cheese” (the grated Parmesan from a container)

The Filling

  • 2 Slices Provolone Cheese
  • 3-4 Slices Turkey (deli slices)
  • 3-4 Slices Ham (deli slices)
  • 6-8 Slices Hard Salami (layered)
  • 2 Tbsp Jarred Roasted Red Peppers (drained)
  • 1 Tbsp Sliced Black Olives
  • 1-2 Tbsp Shredded Parmesan (from a tub, for texture)

Wife’s Variation (Optional)

  • Roasted Red Pepper Italian Dressing
  • Mayonnaise

Instructions

1. Preheat and Prep the Butter

  • Preheat your oven to 400ยฐF.
  • In a microwave-safe bowl, melt the butter and EVOO together.
  • Stir in the garlic powder, onion powder, and Italian seasoning. Set aside.

2. Toast the Bun

  • Slice your bun open and lay both halves on a sheet pan, inside-up.
  • Brush a generous layer of the seasoned butter mix onto the insides of both buns.
  • Sprinkle the insides with a tiny bit of the “shake cheese”.
  • Toast the buns in the oven for 5 minutes, or until the edges are just starting to brown.

3. Build the Base

  • Remove the buns from the oven.
  • Pour a drizzle of the Sweet Italian Dressing onto the inside of both bunsโ€”don’t saturate it, just a light coat.
  • On the bottom bun, stack the cold cuts, cheese, and veggies in this order:
    • Turkey
    • Hard Salami
    • One Slice of Provolone Cheese
    • Ham
    • Hard Salami
    • Jarred Roasted Red Peppers
    • Sliced Black Olives
    • Shredded Parmesan
  • Place the second slice of provolone cheese directly on the inside of the top bun (it will act as a shield and melt beautifully).

4. Melt and Warm

  • Put both halves of the sandwich (still separate) back in the oven for 6 minutes, or until the cheese is melted and bubbling.
  • Carefully remove the sheet pan and assemble the sandwich by placing the top bun onto the bottom.

5. The Final Kick

Take it out, slice it, and enjoy!

Brush a little more of the remaining melted butter/spices right onto the top crust of the sandwich.

(Optional, but highly recommended) Turn the oven to Convection at 350ยฐF and pop the sandwich back in for 2 minutes. This gives you those amazing, slightly crispy, burnt edges that make the sandwich sing.

Oh yeah, did you see the soup?

…And what should I call this?

While we’re at it, which local pizza shop or deli makes your favorite Italian Sub? More than one answer is OK!

Join the Meatball Club


We can talk about meatball club. We can share recipes & secrets. A meatball sub is great, but a meatball club is epic. (With a small shout out to the meatball melt.) Stack or you’re whack.

A tall layered sandwich called โ€œThe Meatball Club,โ€ made with toasted bread, melted provolone cheese, marinara sauce, and meatballs stacked like a club sandwich. The phrase โ€œThe Meatball Clubโ€ appears in bold wooden-style text at the top on a black background.d black.

๐Ÿ”ด๐Ÿ”ด๐Ÿ”ด

You have to check out this design on TONS of STUFF at TeePublic & RedBubble. Get a T-shirt, a hat, a pink, a sticker, a magnet, an apron, a mug, a clock, socks… and you’re in the club. No questions asked. Maybe share some photos of your homemade meatball clubs.

๐Ÿ”ด๐Ÿ”ด๐Ÿ”ด

๐Ÿ”ด The Meatball Merch ๐Ÿ”ด

A close-up of 'The Meatball Club' sandwich, featuring three layers of toasted garlic bread with melted mozzarella cheese on top. Between the bread layers are sliced meatballs in marinara sauce, with more melted mozzarella visibly oozing out. The sandwich is stacked high, and the background is solid transparent.

๐Ÿ”ด๐Ÿ”ด๐Ÿ”ด

Make sure you check out all my meatball posts:

More Halloween & Food Mazes & Maze Merch!


Here’s a few to do for free, and you can get ’em on some stuff at my TeePublic & RedBubble Stores! As always, if you try ’em, please share your solution & tag me on social media. I’m @AiXeLsyD13 on just about everything.

I drew this one quickly & did some color on it today. I really could have leaned into the pumpkin patch theme had I planned it out a bit better. What should I do for my next book? Holidays? Spooky stuff? Just mazes? Simple stuff? A mix?

I wanted to do some simple ones for merch, the food ones seem fun, and I wanted to do some more Halloween mazes.

I thought this went without saying, but I guess I have to say it. Please don’t download these and put them into your own print-on-demand books for sale and pass them off as your own. Please?

Seriously, check this stuff out on all the merch! You can get it on a variety of things, and customize a lot of the colors.

Is there anything you’d like to see made into merch? Any of my mazes I have drawn, or have an idea for one?

Also… for the artists… Ever have a hard time drawing something simple? I could not settle on a bat shape for the maze. I worked up sketches, which I rarely do. I worked through a bunch of stuff & shared it on Instagram.

The pretzel was inspired by this:

The Corned Beast Hash Stack


Ever have an idea that you can’t shake? I had all the ingredients. I wanted to make them into a sandwich. I didn’t want to fry the components in separate pans & use the oven… so I did it all on a big baking sheet.

It worked. Mostly.

A layered sandwich featuring hash brown patties, melted cheese, scrambled eggs, & corned beef hash served on a white plate.

The hashbrown patties came in the shape that I wanted to mimic, so I wasn’t interested in a muffin tin for the eggs or the corned beef hash. I may just used canned corned beef next time & not the hash… and I may end up cooking the eggs separately. Maybe.

This is how I did it this time. I made 4 of them.

Ingredients:

  • 8 frozen hash brown patties
  • 1 can of corned beef hash
  • 4 eggs
  • Milk (optional)
  • Salt, Pepper, Onion Powder to taste
  • 4 slices of American cheese singles
  • Spray oil
  • Heavy duty aluminum foil.

How I did it…

  1. Preheat the oven to 425ยฐ on the air fryer setting.
  2. Make 4 foil rings the size of your hash brown patties and set them aside.
  3. Sprayed the (large) backing sheet with the cooking oil.
  4. Pop those hash brown patties on like a checkerboard.
  5. Put it in the oven for 5 minutes.
  6. Take it out, flip the patties, and spoon the corned beef hash into some of the empty spots. (Think if each row or column like 1 sandwich.)
  7. Pop it back in & crank it down to 400ยฐ on air fry for another 10 minutes.
  8. While that is going mix your egg, milk. & spices.
  9. Pull the chaos triple checkerboard out and flip the corned beef.
  10. Put the foil rings in place in the empty spots, pour the eggs in there, and put it back in the oven for 5 minutes.
  11. Pull it out, remove the foil rings that barely worked, toss on the cheese slices, and pop it in for 2 minutes.
  12. Take it out, let it cool for 3ยฝ, and stack it on a plate! (I added ketchup here too – should have also used some Red Hot or something similar.)
    • That’s…
      • -Hashbrown Patty-
      • —— Cheese —–
      • ——– Egg ——-
      • Corned Beef Hash
      • -Hashbrown Patty-
  13. Eat it!

It’s a work in progress, but it was delicious. What do you think? How would you do it? Our oven has a convection setting and an air fry setting. I could see this working with either, or just by baking it… adjusting the time & temp. I didn’t want to stack it like a casserole, but I certainly could have… and frozen hash browns or tater tots may have worked…. The egg would probably have to be used as a binder for that and/or the corned beef… but then were in casserole land again, not a stacked sandwich.

Campfire Cookin’!


We recently went camping, and one of my favorite things to do when camping is cooking over a campfire. We did hobo packs the first night and mountain pies the second night. Both nights were a hit with the whole family.

I’ll show ya what we did if you tell me how you do it. Although, I did already solicit mountain pie recipes in 2018.

Hobo Packs

Pretty much anything you throw in foil packet and toss over a campfire will work here. You can go right on the coals, but this was a recent fire, so I put them on a grate on top. There’s 2 layers of heavy duty foil here, but you don’t want it over a direct flame. These would work great on the grill too. I went for 30 minutes, flipped it, & let it go another 30 minutes.

I was looking for stew meat or cubed beef in the grocery store, but the Aldi on the way to the campground had beef that was marked as “Good for Carne Asada” and it looked perfect.

Ingredients:

  • Beef
  • Onion
  • White Mushrooms
  • Russet Potatoes
  • Red Bell Pepper
  • Orange Bell Pepper
  • Carrots
  • Zucchini
  • Butter
  • Spices!
    • Black pepper
    • Season salt
    • Onion powder
    • Garlic powder
    • Mrs. Dash’s Table Blend

What would you put on yours?

Mountain Pies

I have made mountain pies many different ways, but this time we went with the classic pizza ones, and some Italian sub ones for dinner. Everyone went rogue for dessert.

Mine were done up proper…

  • Pizza Mountain Pie
    • White bread
    • Pizza Sauce
    • Shredded Mozzarella
    • Pepperoni
    • Roasted Red Peppers
    • Black Olives
    • Mushrooms
  • Italian Sub Mountain Pie
    • White bread
    • Ham Lunch Meat
    • Salami Lunch Meat
    • Pepperoni
    • Turkey Lunch Meat
    • Sliced Provolone
    • Roasted Red Peppers
    • Black Olives
    • Italian Dressing
  • Banana Split Mountain Pie (This is the one I had!)
    • White bread
    • Jif Choclolate/Peanut Butter Spread
    • Sliced Banana
    • Mini Marshmallows
  • Strawberry Chocolate Mountain Pie
    • White bread
    • Sliced Strawberries
    • Hershey’s Choclolate
    • Powdered Sugar (on top)

In the past I’ve made Mountain Pie Reubens (on rye), baked bean pies, leftover vegetable soup (thickened up) pies, apple pies, peach pies, peanut butter cup pies, breakfast (eggs & ham) pies, and probably more. The possibilities are endless. Sloppy Joe? Chipped ham BBQ? Grilled cheese? Ham n’ cheese? Turkey melt? Cheesesteak? Hot PB&J? Hot dog & baked beans? Biscuit dough around something? How do you do yours?

Of course, this doesn’t cover all the possibilities of campfire cooking. There’s hot dogs, s’mores, campfire banana splits, campfire corn, baked potatoes, & more. What do you do over your campfires?

We recently had a blast at Forest Ridge Cabins & Campgrounds & would love to go back for more!

I’m actually contemplating getting a cheap electric countertop sandwich grill that seals the edges to make indoor mountain pies.

French-Dip Sandwiches & Smashed Potatoes


I made these the other night, and they were good! Here’s a quick & dirty method more than a recipe…

A French Dip sandwich with some Au Jus and smashed potatoes.

~๐Ÿฝ๏ธ~

For the French dip above, I just sautรฉed a diced sweet onion and canned mushrooms in medium heat in butter, set the goods aside, cranked the heat, seared a roast from Aldi in the same pan, added it, the onions/mushrooms, some shredded carrots, & a can of condensed French Onion Soup to the crock pot on high for 4 hours.

I pulled the roast out to “rest” for a bit before slicing, then put it back into a bowl with some of the liquid for the crock pot

For the buns, I just bought Mancini sausage rolls, melted butter in the microwave, put them in at 375ยฐ for 2 minutes, then pulled them out.

Then I piled on the sliced/shredded beef & mushrooms/onions/carrots and some sliced white American cheese, then back in the 375ยฐ oven for 5 minutes.

I made an “Au Jus” McCormick packet, and added some of the liquid from the crock pot for dipping. Toasting the buns really helped it stand up to the dip so it didn’t fall apart.

The potatoes were just little Yukon gold potatoes boiled in salty water for 30 min., smashed on to an oil-brushed cooking sheet, then baked at 425ยฐ for ยฝ hour.

I spiced the onions, meat, butter, & potatoes throughout all the stops, I think I added chicken bullion to the potato water, too. I used a lot of garlic & onion powder, black pepper, and Season Salt or Mrs. Dash’s table blend.

Well that’s it. Do you make anything similar? Have some tips & tricks? I have made similar stuff before with Swiss or Havarti or Provolone, used all kinds of different beef or even Steak-Ums, whatever buns/bread look good, used the French’s fried onions, etc. Ya gotta change it up and/or use what you have on hand!

The Meatball Club


So, yesterday I made spaghetti with homemade meatballs.โ€‚Today, I wanted a meatball sub.โ€‚I was thinking I still had some good buns from New Year’s day.โ€‚They were not good.โ€‚I had already melted the butter.โ€‚The store-brand white bread was calling to me.โ€‚A sandwich?โ€‚No, a club..,โ€‚Something worthy of shenanigans.

The Meatball Club:  A double-decker meatball sandwich on toasted white bread, teeming with tasty sauce & melted Gruyere and Swiss cheese.
Behold:โ€‚The Meatball Club

It seemed to be a hit on various social media platforms, so I thought I’d share the love.โ€‚If you make one, please, post the photo, tag me (@AiXelsyD13 on just about everything), and let me know how it was!

The Meatballs:

I have shared my meatball ingredient secrets a quadruple of times:

I generally don’t measure, and make them different every time.โ€‚This time I fried them on medium-high in a large pan on the stove & a tiny bit of EVOO.

The Sauce:โ€‚

OK, gonna level with you.โ€‚I am not Italian.โ€‚This is going to make some people mad.โ€‚I use jarred sauce.โ€‚This was the cheap Aldi stuff.โ€‚Usually we get that or the Prego Three Cheese.โ€‚I add brown sugar & Parmesan/Romano shake cheese.โ€‚Sometimes, I even add shopped garlic, onion powder, or “Italian Seasoning.”โ€‚This time it was just brown sugar and cheese.โ€‚I don’t measure.โ€‚I toss a little in with abandon.โ€‚I like the sweetness & it cuts the acid.

The Club:

Get your stuff…

  • ยผ stick butter
  • Garlic powder
  • Onion powder
  • Parsley or (Italian Seasoning)
  • 6 or so leftover meatballs.
  • Shredded cheese (I had Gruyere & Swiss, but I would probably go for Mozzarella or Provolone, but the stuff I had was fantastic.)
  • “Shake Cheese” I had the cheap Giant Eagle brand Parmesan/Romano blend.
  • Three pieces of white bread.

Do it…

  1. Pre-heat the oven to 390ยฐ on the air fryer setting.
  2. Melt the butter w/ garlic powder, onion powder, & parsley to taste in a microwave save bowl in 30 second intervals, stirring in between until it’s a liquid.
  3. Put the bread on a baking dish, brush on the melted butter after a good stir.โ€‚(I just did the top sides.)
  4. Air fry for 2 minutes, & it gets almost crispy on top, the bottom was nice and toasted.
  5. While you’re doing that nuke the meatballs & sauce on a microwave safe plate for 2 min. (or longer if needed.)
  6. Pull the toast out.โ€‚(I cut the meatballs in half with a spoon then scooped them and the sauce on to two of the slices of bread.)
  7. Top the meatballs with the shredded cheese.
  8. Put the “shake cheese” on the 3rd slice of bread.
  9. Put it back in on air fry for for 4 or 5 minutes.
  10. Pull it out, assemble it like a tower of gluttony, then slice it diagonally with a giant serrated bread knife for dramatic effect.
  11. Take a photo to share & make people hungry.

That’s it.โ€‚It took a little bit of time & prep, but it was worth it.

Notes:

  • If you cook & have your own meatball or sauce recipe, of course do that.
  • Use whatever kind of cheese you want, shredded, or sliced, or whatever.
  • I would guess you can use the oven on 375ยฐ-ish on a regular setting for a bit longer times, or a counter top air fryer.
  • You could also probably do all of it in the air fryer from cooking the meatballs to melting the butter if you have the appropriate vessels.
  • If you slice it in rectangles and not triangles, you are a psychopath.

Discussion:

  • If you’re out of sausage or sub buns, or hot dog buns, what are you using?โ€‚Pita?โ€‚Tortilla?โ€‚Soft Pretzel?โ€‚Dinner Rolls?โ€‚Bisquick?โ€‚Crescent roll dough?
  • Please, tell me in the comments how wrong it is to use jarred sauce or add brown sugar.
  • Share with me your meatball secrets.
  • Do you like the powdery shake cheese or the fancy stuff?
  • Do you make a forbidden sandwich?โ€‚What is it?
  • Is this a Meatball Club, or a Meatball Melt?

This is why I had leftover meatballs:

Hot Turkey Sandwich Dinner (Quick Style!) ๐Ÿฆƒ


I love a good hot sandwich smothered in gravy, be it roast beef, meatloaf, or turkey. I was in the mood for a turkey one like you’d get at a diner, and being a week night after work, wanted to put it together pretty quickly as I hadn’t thought ahead to use the crock pot.


Putting it here, so if I want it again I’ll remember what I did right & want to try it again. I may have to double the recipe when the kids are home. This fed two of us & left enough for me for lunch.

The Turkey:

  • 2 Breast Cutlets
  • 1 can of Yuengling Traditional Lager (Or Straub Amber, or Shiner Bock, or Smithwick’s, or Killian’s Irish Red. Pick a good beer.)
  • โ…” cup carrot chips. (Yup, cheated & bought those in a bag too.)
  • 1 Spanish Onion, peeled & quartered.
  • 2 tsp. of minced garlic from a jar like a lazy person.
  • A bunch of your preferred spices. (I used, cracked pepper, poultry seasoning, sage, thyme, onion powder, garlic powder, paprika, Mrs. Dash’s table blend, and a bit of Season All.)
  1. Pre-heat the oven to 350ยฐ
  2. Put the turkey cutlets in a roasting pan, & pour the beer over them. Again, get good beer. No one wants you to cook with Coors or Budweiser or Mic Ultra.
  3. Toss in the onion & carrot.
  4. Add all the spices. When you think it’s too much, keep going.
  5. Stick in your meat thermometer probe that reads temperature while cooking.
  6. Pit the lid on, put it in the oven.
  7. I set the timer for 50 minutes, but it was done in a half hour or so. Cook to 165ยฐ internal temp & let it rest. I got distracted & took it to 170ยฐ and no one died, so don’t worry if it’s not precise.

The Veggies:

  • Bundle of Broccoli
  • Carrots from that bag you already opened.
  • Chicken Bullion Cube.
  • You still have those spices out, right?
  1. Eyeball some water into the pot, ad the bullion & spices.
  2. Chop that broccoli up and compost the stems or make those little fried things that looks delicious.
  3. Put the broccoli & carrots in the steamer thing that goes on top of the pot.
  4. Boil it for… I dunno. Not long. I like my broccoli bright green & crunchy. Bonus with the carrots being cut like this, they cook quickly too.

The ‘Taters:

  • They’re from a box. Follow the directions… sort of. I bought the store brand.
  • Use more butter than they call for.
  • Put a chicken bullion cube in the water instead of salt.
  • instead of lowfat milk, use ยฝ whole milk and ยฝ buttermilk. Add sour cream if you’re into complete and total anarchy.

The Gravy:

  • 2 jars of turkey gravy
  • roasting pan drippings
  • A bit of those carrots & onions.
  1. Heat the gravy on medium-high.
  2. Add pan drippings to taste
  3. Chop up the carrots & onions pretty small, & add them too.
  4. Cook it on medium until it thickens back up.

The Sandwich:

  • Texas Toast (Why do they call it that? it wasn’t toasted.)
  • That turkey, sliced after it has rested a bit.
  • That gravy.
  1. Put the bread on the plate, with some mashed potatoes beside it.
  2. Put the turkey on top.
  3. Add some gravy on top of everything.
  4. Put another piece of bread on the top. (Unless you want an open-faced sandwich.)
  5. Slather more gravy on that.
  6. Drink a shot of gravy.

Don’t forget to eat your vegetables so it’s a healthy meal. This is a quick week night dinner that tastes like it cooked all day.

Things I might try next time…

  • Toast the Texas Toast, or grill it up like grilled cheese or a patty melt?
  • Bacon pieces in the gravy.
  • Bacon on the sandwich.

Have any suggestions, tips, tricks, or secrets?

If you were a lunch lady in the 80’s and know how to make/where to get that greenish-yellow glow-in-the-dark colored school cafeteria gravy, hit me up in the comments! I am super nostalgic for that,

A Tale of Two Wendy’s.


I eat fast food more than a person should. I’m always on the go all over the place with work, and when I get to dine out… fast food is usually a safe shellfish-(and therefore death)-free option. Wendy’s burgers are pretty good. I like a baked potato more than fries sometimes… if I have time to sit & eat.

In my never-ending quest to be ridiculous for absolutely no reason other than self-amusement, I present this to you:

Pepperidge Farm Adventure Maze


So, right before new years, I went on adventure looking for mini cocktail rye breads from Pepperidge Farm. They used to make one called Jewish Rye, and Pumpernickel.

The Jewish Rye was cool because it contained ground caraway seeds instead of the standard whole caraway seeds. I have had bouts with Diverticulitis, so I try to stay hydrated & avoid tiny sharp seeds. Caraway absolutely ruins sauerkraut, but it is good in rye bread.

Pumpernickel is cool because it essentially is named for the devil’s farts… and if that’s not cool, I don’t know what is. This is also code in my household for “I am always right.” I told my wife the name origin behind it, she said there was no way, Googled it… and, like I said… I am always right.

I know that the other manufacturer, S. Rosen, make cocktail-sized rye and pumpernickel bread… but the rye is not seedless. Apparently Hanky Panky means something entirely different in some parts of Ohio.

My wife likes to make this stuff for New Year’s that’s like swiss cheese, lemon-pepper, and mayo on the cocktail-sized Jewish Rye then toasted in the oven. It’s delicious. I like to make little mini open faced Reubens. The pumpernickel would be an acceptable alternative if I absolutely can’t find the seedless rye.

Because I’m weird and can’t leave anything alone, we have this…

I, of course, posted it on Twitter, Instagram, & Facebook. I tagged Pepperidge Farm & Pepperidge Farm Cares. To their credit, they did reply:

I did tag all the stores that I could in the photo on Instagram and Facebook, but none of them have taken the bait.

I had to turn it up a notch, to which they did not reply:

Hello, 

I was wondering if anyone had time to try and complete my maze while considering bringing back cocktail-sized Jewish Rye. 

The ground caraway was awesome, because it isn't a potential diverticulitis disaster like whole seeds are. 

My wife wpuld [sic] use it to make this delicious lemon pepper cheese appetizer, and I like to make tiny Reuben sandwiches and pretend I am a reformed King King that no longer has to eat people sacrificed to me on Skull Island. 

The mini pumpernickel is cool just because of the etymology. I mean? It has to be the most metal bread out there.  

How can you discontinue such wonderful things?

All of that just says:

Hello,

I was wondering if anyone had time to try and complete my maze while considering bringing back cocktail-sized Jewish Rye.

The ground caraway was awesome, because it isn’t a potential diverticulitis disaster like whole seeds are.

My wife wpuld [sic] use it to make this delicious lemon pepper cheese appetizer, and I like to make tiny Reuben sandwiches and pretend I am a reformed King King that no longer has to eat people sacrificed to me on Skull Island.

The mini pumpernickel is cool just because of the etymology. I mean? It has to be the most metal bread out there. ๐Ÿค˜

How can you discontinue such wonderful things?

Also, AI generated art seems to be the cool thing these days, so I tried to make this on a few different ones to go along with the blog post:

King Kong feasting upon a stack of tiny Reuben sandwiches on tiny bread.  There is a stack of sandwiches in the background resembling the Empire State Building.  it is evening with a full moon in the clear sky.  King Kong has a highly detailed face where you can clearly see his expression of pure satisfaction.

I may have to buy a gorilla suit and make some tiny Reubens with the S. Rosen bread… and convince the wife or kids to take my photo.

Or, I may have to make a maze for S. Rosen, featuring a caraway seed that must make the journey through my guys without getting stuck, causing inflammation & a possible infection. Or maybe it has to make its way through a grinder before beign added to the dough & baked?

I doubt than anyone at Pepperidge Farm or Pepperidge Farm Cares is going to complete my maze. But, if they do, you can thank me later.

As far as discussion here, which I always ask for yet rarely get in the comments, let me know what you do with mini cocktail rye or pumpernickel bread.

Also… Ler’s discuss Reubens. Russian or Thousand Island? Regular rye or marbled? Do you add anything like bacon or swap out corned beef for Pastrami? Do you ever use Havarti instead of Swiss? Grilled in a pan, or on a panini press? I should blog about Reubens. Mmm. I’m hungry.

Also, please, please, complete the maze! Send me the results, post & tag me!

The most important takeaway is that if I tell you something, I am always right. Pumpernickel.