Tag Archives: Smart Phone

I’m not Kmart.

Posted on by Standard 12

This is a logo for Kmart Australia.

Are YOU Kmart Smart?

Apparently, the difference between an address bar, a search box, and a To field are entirely lost on a certain segment of the population.  That’s OK, because those people are here for our amusement.  I believe this kind of thing may sort of be the fault of a smartphone, but maybe I’m giving too much credit there.  I’m still lost on the exact chain of events, but this came through my blog’s contact form:

From: Mckiver <mckiver317@gmail.com>
To:  <me>
Sent: Monday, January 16, 2012
Subject: W(aL)D Feedback

Name: Mckiver
Email: mckiver317@gmail.com
Website: http://google
Message / Comment: January 16, 2012

Hello!  I have an Award Card.  My Award Card’s validation date is 12/05/11 – 12/09/11.  I would like to know if my Award Card can still be used?  If not, I would like to know if I can exchange this gift card for a new valid one?  I also want to know the valid amount on my gift card (if any)?

Thank You,

Please email your reply/answer to me at:
mckiver317@gmail.com
or
mckiver317@hotmail.com

Thanks Again!

How’d you find my blog?: I found this  blog on the back of my Kmart Award Card.

Time: Monday January 16, 2012 at
IP Address: 00.000.000.000
Contact Form URL: https://aixelsyd13.wordpress.com/contact/
Sent by an unverified visitor to your site.

Again with this crap:  “How’d you find my blog?: I found this  blog on the back of my Kmart Award Card.”  No, I’m pretty sure you didn’t.  But, you’re here anyway.

So, I wrote back…

From: Waldo Lunar <world.and.lunar.domination@gmail.com>
Date: Tue, Jan 17, 2012
Subject: Re: W(aL)D Feedback (Not Kmart)
To: Mckiver, mckiver317@hotmail.com

Hello Mr. or Ms. McKiver,

I just wanted to write to let you know that I’m not Kmart.  I believe you found a blog post that I wrote about Kmart, then somehow navigated to my blog’s contact form to send this email.  Perhaps you searched for “www.kmartfeedback.com” instead of using the url bar, and it brought you to my blog?  Or perhaps you searched for “help@customerservice.kmart.com” instead of sending an email?  Were you maybe browsing on your phone?

Unfortunately I am unable to assist with your awards card query.  I am also not McDonald’s.  Good luck in your quest for information, I hope that Kmart is able to provide an agreeable answer.  Hopefully they are more responsive than my dealings with Pizza Hut.

Rock and Roll, my friend!
-W(aL)D

I never got a reply.  Perhaps they were embarrassed, …or just incredibly computer illiterate?  So I tried to nudge one:

From: Waldo Lunar <world.and.lunar.domination@gmail.com>
Date: Fri, Jan 20, 2012
Subject: Re: W(aL)D Feedback (Not Kmart)
To: Mckiver , mckiver317@hotmail.com
Cc: help@customerservice.kmart.com

Hello McKiver,

I hadn’t heard back from you, and I was worried that you had given up in your quest for award card information.  Did Kmart get a hold of you?  I Cc’ed them on the email hoping they’d step in & deliver your information.  I hadn’t received a thank you from them for trying to help out a Kmart shopper, so I was a little discouraged.

If you were able to use your gift card, what did you buy?  Anything exciting?  Last time I was at Kmart, I bought some really warm socks.  They’re nice this time of year.  I like to keep my feet warm.

Does your Kmart have a Little Caesar’s out front?  I remember their pizza used to be awesome, but now it tastes like tomato paste spread over cardboard & covered in wax chips.  Someone ought to look into that.  Yeah, it’s only $5… but my $5 was hard-earned, and I’m not going to spend it eating a turd, you know?

In conclusion, I’d suggest socks, not pizza for your award/gift card.

Hope you’re having a nice day!
-Waldo Lunar

Well, Kmart is concerned at least:

From: Kmart Help <help@customerservice.kmart.com>
Date: Fri, Jan 20, 2012
Subject: Re: W(aL)D Feedback (Not Kmart) (KMM20865508V93493L0KM)
To: Waldo Lunar <world.and.lunar.domination@gmail.com>

 Good Morning Waldo,

 Thank you for contacting Kmart.com.

Waldo, we are sorry for any inconvenience you encountered with the feedback that you have given today. We know that your time is valuable and we appreciate the fact you took the time to give us feedback on our performance.

 We are listening to what you have to say. The feedback that you have provided today regarding (will be taken into consideration as we continue to enhance our services to meet the needs of our customers, (including you) going forward.

 Many of the changes that we have made have been a result of feedback from customers like you.

 We are here for you! Please reply should you have any further questions. We value your business and look forward to serving you in the future. You can also contact us on our customer service number 1-800-733-7249 or login to our chat support. Have a wonderful day!

We certainly hope you will continue to make Kmart your choice for quality and value!

At Kmart we care for our customers’ feedback, it helps us improve our service. Take our survey to tell us how we’re doing.

Make sure you’re registered at Kmart.com for emails, so we can stay in touch! Please add Kmart values, Kmart.com to your address book to ensure our emails reach your inbox.

Sincerely,

Stanton K.(mkundal)

Kmart Customer Care

webcenter@customerservice.kmart.com

1–800-733-7249.

We’ll see what happens, I guess.  I’m still not McDonald’s.

See also:

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McConsistency is Key.

Posted on by Standard 5

Recently for lunch, I had a reconstituted-onion & cheese sandwich from McDonald’s with a little bit of beef on it.  It was extra special because it was pressed.  It was not like a panini press with grill lines, but more like someone sat on it.  There were also pickles stacked on top of each other, sticking out of the side.  Very artful & creative!

This wasn’t even from the West Liberty location.

I recently had a friend send one of his friends’ McTale-of-woe to me, because I have apparently become some sort of authority on all things wrong with McDonald’s customer service.

The reason I told of my recent adventure in lunch, is that it fits with the tale as told by someone who wishes to remain nameless, blameless, & shameless:

From: Pattyless Sandwich
Date: Wed, Sep 28, 2011 at 9:29 AM
Subject: The Day McDonald’s Shit All Over My Good Time
To: The Hamburglar

On Sept. 27, 2011 I went through the drive thru at McDonald’s on Mt. Lebanon Blvd. in Castle Shannon, PA. I ordered a number 4 (two cheeseburgers), and I asked for no onion. When I got back to my friends house and we started eating I noticed that the sandwich looked really thin but I just figured it was smashed down a little more THAN NECESSARY so I bit in anyway. As I was chewing, I realized something wasn’t right about what was being smashed around in my mouth. I set my sandwich down and removed the top part of the bun to see the following: slice of cheese on the bottom half of the bun, pickles, ketchup, and mustard. Yes, that is correct, there was no meat on the sandwich. Luckily I had another sandwich, that in fact had the patty, to eat, but they put onions on it. The only thing I asked them to void. Now I understand work is work and if you have a job to live then that is fantastic, but to be the person to put the burgers together at McDonald’s, I feel like you go through a training day to be shown how to assemble them. Bottom bun, slice of cheese (I’m guessing it is on the bottom so the burger melts it, let’s not get crazy this shit isn’t cooked together), HAMBURGER PATTY, and then your condiments. Who put mine together and thought “hm….this looks right. Nothing is missing, I am a brilliant fucking burger maker extraordinaire.”? It’s not a hamburger from a hamburger joint if there is no meat. To quote a smart fast food chain (rhymes with Shmendy’s), “Where’s the beef!?”

Sincerely,
Pattyless Sandwich

And, there’s even a Facebook photo:

Veggie Burger?

Veggie Burger?

Ridiculous.  At least this didn’t come through my contact form from someone thinking I was McDonald’s.

Friends, I seriously wish I could write to the McGiant on your behalf, but all of my insane yet legitimate complaints have fallen on deaf ears, blind eyes, or typical McCustomer-Service employees.

Check out my track record.  While I feel for you, maybe try their McPennsylvania site?  I can do nothing at this point but perhaps share in your misery, my freinds!

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s,pןɐuopɔɯ ʇou ɯɐ ı

Posted on by Standard 16

I wrote one last email to Harmony & her husband to try & clear things up.  I haven’t had a response yet, but I’m really doubting I’ll get one.  What do you think?

From: Waldo Lunar <world.and.lunar.domination@gmail.com>
Date: Fri, Sep 9, 2011
Subject: Re: AiXeLsyD13 / W(aL)D – I’m not McDonald’s
To: “krebs955@gmail.com” <krebs955@gmail.com>
Cc: shovelman11@yahoo.com, pastorskid_tiwtc4u@yahoo.com, pit.05834@us.stores.mcd.com, Ella.Jones@us.mcd.com, info@westliberty.mcdtoday.com, sandra.jaeger@gmail.com, rick.sapko@us.mcd.com

Hello Harmony & Harmony’s Husband,

I’m going to try this one more time…  I am ERiC AiXeLsyD.  I write a goofy blog.  You didn’t email me.  My email address is world.and.lunar.domination@gmail.com (please see the “From” field of this email for reference).  It doesn’t say “world.and.lunar.domination@gmail.com” on the top (or bottom) of a McDonald’s receipt.  You almost had me on this.  I actually had to go to this McDonald’s to check, because I really did believe that “The reason [you] posted on [my] blog is because it was on the bottom of our receipt” as stated in your last email.

Obtaining the receipt was actually quite a harrowing experience, but I survived.  Thank you for your concern.  Please, see the scanned images at the links below (also attached) if you don’t believe me:

As you can see, it also does not say https://aixelsyd13.wordpress.com at the top (or bottom) of the receipt, which is my blog’s URL.  It also does not list my email address as noted above.

It does list Rick Sapko as a manager (not me), and give the email address ella.jones@us.mcd.com (also not me).  I’m just trying to let you know that if you were trying to contact ella.jones@us.mcd.com, you have unfortunately been unsuccessful in doing so.

You contacted me by using the form located at https://aixelsyd13.wordpress.com/contact/ (also a url, not an email address).  I know this because WordPress is quite an ingenious blogging platform, and emails that come to me through that web form have the subject line “W(aL)D Feedback”.  You may also remember filling out fields that you don’t normally have in an email client, like “Message / Comment” and “How’d you find my blog?”

What I believe has happened is that you searched Google or Bing for “ella.jones@us.mcd.com” instead of entering it into an email client.  This landed you at my blog.  I’ve tried it with both.  A search for her email address does indeed point you to my blog.  From there, you somehow found your way to the contact page… and we know the rest.  I’m just trying to help.

I see you have a Gmail address.  Being that it’s an email address you were trying to use and the weird set of circumstances, I’m assuming you found my blog with your Android phone.  Put the phone down.  I’d suggest finding a computer, and going to http://mail.google.com, logging in, clicking the “Compose Mail” button, and pasting “ella.jones@us.mcd.com” into the “To:” field.  Then, you may type away in the big blank box, and click “Send” when you’re done.

That is how you email Ms. Jones (and not me) regarding the insanity that abounds at the West Liberty Avenue McDonald’s.  I have to warn you though, she doesn’t really reply to emails.  At least not my emails, anyway.  I hope this helps.  I’m just trying to facilitate the expression of dissatisfaction with this Bermuda Triangle of fast food service.

I do, however, encourage your comments on my blog… as long as they’re directed to me, and not at McDonald’s.  I don’t mind the ones aimed at McDonald’s, but they fall on deaf ears.  I don’t think anyone at McDonald’s reads or cares about my blog.  If you would like to complain about McDonald’s to other people that aren’t McDonald’s, check out McSucks.com and McDonaldsSucks.com some time.  I would also encourage a review on UrbanSpoon.

Harmony’s Husband… I speak this as a consumer.  Please, please, please…  take pride in your work, and convince others around you to do the same.  Encourage burgers built with pickles in the middle, an amount of reconstituted onions that does not resemble a White Castle burger, and ketchup only on the inside of the bun… not the outside.  Encourage the politeness of the people working the cash register.  Encourage those taking orders to not do things like this…

McEmpoyee:  May I take your order?  (In some areas closer to downtown, this greeting is reduced to a wordless look, implying “What?”)
Me:  Hi.  I’d like two Crispy BBQ snack wraps, a lar…
McEmployee:  [Interrupting] Crispy or Grilled?
Me:  Um…  Crispy.
McEmployee:  Do you want Ranch or Honey Mustard?
Me:  Uh..  BBQ?
McEmployee:  OK.  Your total is…
Me:  [My turn to interrupt…]  Can I also get a large fry and a Sweet Tea?
McEmployee:  [Usually rolls eyes and.or sighs about here…]  What size fries?
Me:  Large please.
McEmployee:  You want a drink?
Me:  Yes.  Large Sweet Tea?  (If I say a size, I’m usually told there is only one size.  If I don’t say a size, I’ll be asked what size.)
McEmployee:  For here or to go?
Me:  To go, please.
Mc Employee:  [Sets tray on counter.]  Slide your card.  (Maybe the total is read here.)
[Food comes, & McEmployee, McFry-Technician, or McManager sets it on tray.]
Me:  Sorry, can I get that to go?
McEmployee:  [Looks at receipt.  It’s a 50/50 on whether it notes dine in or to go.  Puts food in bag.]  Here.
Me:  Thanks!

This has happened to me on more than one occasion at more than one location.  I hope you work at a competent location, like the one in Canonsburg.

Good luck getting through to Ms. Jones.  I haven’t been very successful in that matter.  I have four email addresses associated with the west liberty McDonald’s location.  You may want to try each of them…

Good luck on your quest, I hope this has finally expressed my point in an understandable manner.  A quick recap: My email address & blog URL are indeed not on a McDonald’s receipt.  You didn’t email me, you used the contact form on my blog.  I am not McDonald’s.  You didn’t email the address listed at the top of a McDonald’s receipt.  You used the contact form on my blog.

Do you want the combo, or just the sandwich?
-ERiC AiXeLsyD
World (and Lunar) Domination

McReceipt 09/07/2011

I don't see my email address or blog url on here anywhere. Do you?

Trust me, I am not McDonald's.

Trust me, I am not McDonald's.

s,pןɐuopɔɯ ʇou ɯɐ ı | Just in case you’re lost…  This is the latest in this round of chaos that involved people contacting me, apparently thinking that I’m McDonald’s.  I think they’ll all pop up in the “related articles” section below.

I’m guessing the four McEmail addresses listed above have a block on my world.and.lunar.domination email address., and I’m guessing Harmony, her husband, Shirley, and Amber are done with this.  I am too, until the next person emails me thinking that I am indeed McDonald’s.

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