I was on a boat in the ocean exactly once in life. We were far enough out that we could not see land. I was told it was a rather calm sea that day. I still puked over the side. I caught an amber-jack, that apparently was not good eating because of a potential parasite? I am deathly allergic to shellfish, and I am not a fan of the beach. I have probably only had rum a handful of times and it was always mixed with Coke or Dr. Pepper. Still though, who doesn’t love the romance & adventure of pirate imagery, and pirate songs?
This collection of thoughts, reflection, & feelings is delivered not unlike catching a glimpse of a ghost ship in the mist on the barely discernable horizon. Sometimes it’s just hinted at on the whispers of the wind or waves of the open sea. Then, all of a sudden you’re in the crow’s nest surveying the chaos of the poop deck in a storm or in the captain’s quarters as he sips rum and recounts tales of anarchy, punk rock, rebellion, & love by candlelight. Maybe it’s the brig? Or a deserted island. It’s left to the reader to fill in the gaps as they dream of their own adventures, shenanigans, & longing. Who can’t relate to a journey, physical or metaphorical? What is the line really? Get lost in this book, & create your own treasure map to get out or to get further lost. 🏴☠️
Curses, Cutlasses, and Cauldrons by Joel Fatal, Local Troublemaker
After you read Joel’s book, you’ll probably want to listen to my “Let’s Get Scurvy 🏴☠️🦜“ playlist, and maybe even try my treasure map maze (from my book, You Can See Yourself Out). Tell me what you like from the playlist & make suggestions for more songs in the comments!
These go around all the time on social media. Saw one on Bluesky. Thought I’d make a playlist. This, like all of my musical tastes, could change if I were to do it again in 5 minutes. Here we are though. I made a playlist & put it on Amazon Music, Spotify, & YouTube.
It was tough to pick. I could do this list probably 5 deep with entirely different yet valid answers right now. I mean, I have whole playlists for color, numbers, dates, names, & more. I also thought of another ask that I wonder if anyone would participate in?
I guess I never did update, lots of the listings are down or read as “Temporarily Unavailable.” I would like them to read as “⚠ 404 Page Not Found.“
I did get two short emails from the offender. Thank you to Jakob Mewes for reaching out! I never did hear back from Jakob after reaching out for further details. Did you Google AiXeLsyD and/or Gasoline Dion and find me here? I’d love to know!
I did get two emails from Mr. Heppke.
From: Kurt Heppke <mail@kurtheppke.com>
Date: Mon, Jun 30, 2025 at 8:22 AM
Subject: Re: Unauthorized Use of My Artwork in Your Book – DMCA & Cease-and-Desist
To: Eric Carroll <red@acted.yo>
Dear Mr. Carrol,
I'm sorry for using your trademarked images and I really want to apologize for that. I took the images from Pinterest and did not check the license. I made a mistake.
I have requested today that the book be stopped selling immediately and will send you confirmation as soon as I have it.
I hereby give you written confirmation that I will no longer use your work.
I also confirm the immediate cessation of any further use or reproduction of your work in any form.
I am truly sorry for the trouble I have caused you.
I would like to make one more point about your WordPress post " Stolen Mazes! (Someone took my art.)". It gives the impression that I have flooded half the world with my books. No. I've sold the book 8 times in the last 3 years. So I think the damage is limited.
That's not an excuse!
Anyway, thank you for your patience and kindness and I will definitely change my behavior when it comes to checking licenses.
Best regards
Kurt Heppke
---
Kurt Heppke
Tel: +## ### ########
Mail: mail@kurtheppke.com
Homepage: www.kurtheppke.com
And, then this, referencing the photo below:
From: Kurt Heppke <mail@kurtheppke.com>
Date: Tue, Jul 1, 2025 at 11:01 AM
Subject: Re: Unauthorized Use of My Artwork in Your Book – DMCA & Cease-and-Desist
To: Eric Carroll <red@cted.yo>
Dear Mr. Carroll,
I have withdrawn my book "Labyrinthe" from sale and would like to inform you of this, as promised:
Labyrinthe
Leichte Schwere und ganz ganz Schwere
ISBN-13: 9783756233120
Verlag: Books on Demand
Erscheinungsdatum: 30.06.2022
the German sentence:
"Wir haben Ihr Buch wunschgemäss für Bestellungen aus dem Buchhandel gesperrt. Auch die Listung für den internationalen Vertrieb und der E-Book-Vertrieb wurden damit automatisch ausgesetzt."
means:
"We have blocked your book from bookstore orders as requested. The listing for international distribution and e-book distribution have also been automatically suspended."
I would like to apologize once again and thank you for your patience and kindness.
Best regards
---
Kurt Heppke
Tel: +## ### ########
Mail: mail@kurtheppke.com
Homepage: www.kurtheppke.com
And this was in there:
✍️
I did not reply, as I am still salty about it. A little theft is still theft. I know Joe Wos sent something over to the effect of a Cease & Desist or DMCA, and Brian Hilbert commented on my last post. I never did get a comment from Sean C. Jackson. Not sure how many other maze artists were robbed. I never did track any others down.
I’m sadly still morbidly curious to get my hands on a copy of this outrage. Share your stories of art theft in the comments, or comment here if your stuff was also uncredited in this book!
Every once in a while, I just throw this into the æther just to see if it gets any response. One time, I got to pop up on stage and sing “I Turned Into a Martian” while Jerry Only played bass, sang, & Doyle Wolfgang Von Frankenstein played guitar, & Goat (a.k.a. Eric Acre, a.k.a. “Chupacabra”) played drums. I’d love to find a video of it if it’s out there.
We take for granted that everything is recorded these days, but back then it wasn’t. Misfits bootleg videos were a hot trade commodity at one point online. I’m pretty sure this show was recorded, because Crowbar had closed-circuit TV’s that were displaying the show as it happened. It may have been deleted or not recorded, it may have hit a personal private collection. Someone else may have been in-house recording. Not sure if Doug Evil was there?
Thanks to Misfits Central & Concert Archives, I now have a specific date: Sunday, November 5, 2000. It was at the now-defunct Crowbar in State College, PA.
An-Die & I road-tripped to State College several times with several different groups to see the Misfits in several iterations in addition to seeing them a bunch in Pittsburgh… so my memories may be conflated. I know Russ from TVCasualty.com was there!
I’m pretty sure Murphy’s Law & Impotent Sea Snakes also played. I only remember this because Goat was pulling double duty, and our friend Laurel was apparently hit in the face with an… adult toy… during the ISS set.
I remember An-Die telling me that I had stage presence, and obviously Jerry Only has a huge stage presence, and it did not jive. Ha ha. I’m sure I looked weird, but holy shit it was fun. (I always feel weird signing without a guitar in my hands anyway.)
Another fun fact, this was after I had broken my nose, and i was wearing a bandage covering most of my face. I know I have photos of that somewhere but I cannot find any.
The Misfits – 11/05/2000 lineup @ Crowbar in State College PA | Jerry Only, Doyle Wolfgang Von Frankenstein, Eric Goat/Chupacabra Acre, & some random a-hole.
Oh yeah, I broke my nose stage diving at American Music Café. Who’s set was it? I think it was Third Place, Tybalt, or maybe even Ten Pounds Lighter/Secrets Lie Within. I just remember someone fake kicking me that ended up not being a fake kick, a weird celery crunching noise, and my nose being mostly under one eye. I ought to try to chronicle old show stories some day.
I was the Fiend Club “Chapter Head” for a minute in the late 90’s early 00’s, so I got to see the band when they were in & around town. I think Jerry & Rocky sort-of kind-of knew who I was, but I always tried to not be a pain in the ass & ask for stuff or to get on the Turbo Die or anything. It was a fun time in life.
If you have the video, or have info that could help me track it down, I’d really appreciate it! Feel free to help by sharing this in fan forums & what-not online. We Are 138!
I just kind of wanted to see this all in one place after seeing it on a few places across social media. I hate to take enjoyment out of someone else’s misery, but this is wild. I wish I was at all adept at video editing because this deserves some kind of supercut.
At first glance, it seems to be a truck getting repo’ed and the repo driver has gone batshit nuts. Upon what amounts to “research” on social media, the guy in the grey shirt is the tow truck driver, towing the truck for a parking violation, and the guy in the black shirt is just not having it, doesn’t understand that his truck is not secure, and apparently can’t handle a tow truck or knew exactly what he was doing in some kind of Falling Down type rage.
Perhaps because of the user name @repodaddy82caddy on TikTok and Instagram?
My dad did some repo work on night shift as a tow truck driver when I was a very young kid. When I was a teen, he told me he quit because he got shot at “too many times.” I know for me, too many times is one, but he never did elaborate.
I have been irrational, and I have been mad… but never this hard. At what point do you separate irrational behavior from an actual mental breakdown? I’m fascinated by the sociology and psychology of it all. I also love crazy criminal style stories.
I had some time recently, and I wanted to see what the process was to publish a print-on-demand book from Amazon. I grabbed a bunch of my smaller easy mazes with no discernable theme that I had previously posted here & on Instagram, and assembled them into a book. All of them were scanned in & maybe fixed a bit with paint.NET, and I put the pages of the book together with OpenOffice, so my only cost came down to the pens & paper. (Not sure how to quantify time & sanity.)
Yup, I finally did it. After drawing mazes for decades.
It was very simple to publish with Amazon. This gave me the confidence to put together another book, perhaps with a bit more coherence, and definitely with a much better cover. I have already started drawing new mazes in a neat little box template so they’re a bit more consistent. What’s a good number? 30? 50?
Also, I need to get all of these older mazes scanned & into a book too. I have some pages that are bigger than my scanner bed though. Perhaps a trip to FedEx Office or Staples is in order.
I just kind of set the price arbitrarily to make a little bit off of publishing. I’m not looking to get rich, but it would be nice to finally make income of off artistic output after decades of ostensibly doodling. (I won’t delve into my musical endeavors which are break even at best but probably a negative sum game. 🤣)
Luckily the creative outlet for me is just that, an outlet. I think we all need to express ourselves artistically or through sports, gardening, or other hobbies.
It also suggested I make a Kindle version, so I did that too. I am not sure if the concept will work there. Can you draw on a Kindle screen with a stylus or your finger? Can you print from a Kindle? I must confess I don’t have one. I am still a fan of books in the traditional form.
If you have ever enjoyed my mazes, or have been one of the awesome people that has completed them and sent in the solution – I humbly ask you (if you’re so inclined) to purchase a paperback for around $6 or a Kindle book for around $3 and let me know what you think. Should I do more? Did you enjoy it? Is the quality any good?
Really, I ask you to try even if you have never solved one of my mazes. Now is a good time to start!
It might make a good gift for kids or adults. It’s a nice way to pass some time or zone out.
If you do buy, can you leave an honest rating/review? I feel like that goes a long way with Amazon.
If you can’t buy or are really not interested, that’s OK too! I would ask you to maybe share the link around.
My thoughts on the next one are that I probably need a table of contents, to maybe title the mazes, and… should I include the solutions in the back? That’s one of my issues. I like to draw the mazes, but don’t really solve them. I may need to reach out for help on that part & pay someone to complete them so I can include the solutions (and make sure they’re solvable).
I probably need help with a title, too.
Thanks for reading, tanks for considering, and please share this link on every social media platform known to humankind: https://www.amazon.com/dp/B0CH2FMH7W
That’s Brussels Sprouts. My oldest is in 2nd grade, and has a journal for what they now call ELA. We called it Writing or English back in the late Triassic when I was in school. Pretty soon I may be up to her writing level. I certainly make about the same amount of spelling and grammar mistakes.
Her journal has some great entries, but I found this amusing and asked if I could share it. Her handwriting looks a lot like mine at that age. The whole thing is just too cute, IMHO.
My second grader’s journal entry about the worst food ever.
The text, as originally written:
11-23-20
My least favite food is breslesperots. The time I tried it was at dinner. I took a bite. My dad said said, how do you like it? I said its discusting! My dad said I was crasy. One of his favite foods are breslsprots. The next time we had the my dad put one on my plate. I put it on his plate. I am relevd we do not have them very often only really on thanks giving. broulsprots are little balls that look like cabig. The worst food ever is braroslsprats.
Here’s my slight correction:
11-23-20
My least favorite food is Brussels sprouts. The time I tried it was at dinner. I took a bite. My dad said said, “How do you like it?” I said it’s disgusting! My dad said I was crazy. One of his favorite foods are Brussels sprouts. The next time we had them, my dad put one on my plate. I put it on his plate. I am relived we do not have them very often, only really on Thanksgiving. Brussels sprouts are little balls that look like cabbage. The worst food ever is Brussels sprouts.
Even though I wholeheartedly disagree, she builds a strong case. I’m anxious to see what the teacher thinks.
I rarely ever blog about or post on social media about work. My work life is work, and my personal life is personal. I’ve never felt the need to discuss, vent about, or provide detail about my job. I’m going to go ahead and break with that for this post.
Unfortunately, the time has come where I need to update my resume. About a year and a half ago, the company that I was working for was sold, shut down, & liquidated. A core group of people decided to try to move on & start a company in the same industry, and I was invited to be a part of it. I was honored to be asked to participate, and glad to be gainfully employed. Sadly, things didn’t pan out as planned, and the company is also in the process of shutting down. Basically, I’m no worse off than I was a year ago.
At that time, I had an updated resume, and went on my first job interview in a long time. I was offered employment elsewhere. It may have worked, but the pay wasn’t where it needed to be for me to comfortably continue to pay rent and put food on the table. I went with the group I knew & salary I needed. I have no regrets, I’m just illustrating that I don’t have much job interview experience, but it has mostly all been positive.
Basically, I’ve been at the same job for 10 or so years. In 2002, I started at an a/v integration company as the shipping guy. That company was purchased in 2005 and I was hired by the new company, which closed in 2011. Then on to the newest one where I was doing all slight variations of the same thing. I liked my work, it was a nice mix of desk/paperwork & physical warehouse work sometimes, it was always different & challenging. I have learned many rules, processes, & things about the equipment over the years. I was able to adapt to many changes, and survived them all (up until now).
I need help with my resume. I think I first updated this format in 2005, when it looked like I may have needed to search for other employment. (Luckily, I was able to work temporarily for the new company, proved my merit, and was hired full time.) In 2012 this format may be stale. I’m not big on titles. I call myself a “shipping guy” but I do much more than that. I have more skills than a simple shipping guy needs. I hate phrases like “team player”. I am, but it sounds goofy. Who reads that & doesn’t roll their eyes? I’m generally not boastful (other than in jest), but this is one time when you need to be. There’s a lot riding on a resume. It gets your foot in the door.
I’m confident in my writing (thanks to this blog), but thrown into a resume it looks braggadocios, fragmented, & boring. I love bullet points, but breaking things down into them, I feel like I lose cohesion.
I need this to grab someone’s attention, highlight what I can do & what I can offer, and get me a job.
I have a lot of skills in my utility belt.
What do I want to do? I’m certainly qualified for shipping, warehousing, and inventory jobs… entry level or supervisory. Sadly, entry level pay may no longer be acceptable. I could certainly do something else though. I’m a quick learner. I’d love to get paid for this writing / blogging / insanity thing (I mean… show/album/food reviews, photos, humor, goofy letters? I can do a bunch of stuff there). Unfortunately I don’t have a degree. Can you get one in shipping? Certainly 10 years experience in shipping I would have learned anything that I could in 2 or 4 years of school? I do have some training in graphic design & commercial art, I have experience in drafting (by hand even… does anyone remember that?), some talents that have yet to get me paid like drawing mazes and photography, and I recently completed classes in Microsoft Project… so I could even fill a “Jr. Project Manager” type role where I can learn as I go. I’m certainly adept with computers, know old school (& also useless) html coding, and can pick things up rather quickly with any kind of program. I can promote things like my band, the blog, and Food Allergies like mad online. I think I’d be a good PR person, I just lack formal training or experience. Maybe it’s time for something different.
So, I need help with my resume. What works, what doesn’t? 1 page? 2 pages? If so, how do I fit it all on one or to pages (I think it kicks into an atrocious 3 now)? What do I need to express? Do I need a cheesy cover letter? Do letters of recommendation help? References right on the resume, or “provided by request”? 3 Personal/3 professional? 3 total? Cover letter? No cover letter? Cover paragraph?
I’m laying it all out here and asking for your help. Take a look at this resume and tell me what you think?
Please excuse the format, it needs a new look… something anyway, and Google Docs may have messed with it a bit. Other than that though… I ask you to be honest, brutal, constructive, and hopefully helpful.
Also… know anyone that’s hiring? Are you hiring? Point me in the right direction here. I’m confident in my in-person interviews, and with anyone that already knows me or has worked with me.
Thanks in advance for your help. I need to start hitting up InDeed, PA Career Link, etc. with my resume. I know I have a lot of friends, family & readers that can help me out here. It would be crazy to not use all of the resources at my disposal, right?
From: Food Allergy Initiative <info@faiusa.org> To: Me <me@my.email.address> Sent: Tuesday, July 19, 2011 12:30 PM Subject: Message from FAI & Research America
Finding a cure for life-threatening food allergies.
Dear Friend,FAI has joined forces with Research!America, the nation’s largest nonprofit advocacy alliance committed to making health research a higher national priority. We’re fighting for strong, continuing support for life-saving research at the NIH. Please join us today by writing your elected officials.You’ll find two letters on our site. The first allows you to voice your support for food allergy research, and the second, provided by Research America, allows you to voice your opposition to budget cuts at NIH.
A strong government-private partnership is the key to finding a cure for food allergies. We’ve worked too hard and come too far to fail now. As the world’s largest source of private funding for food allergy research, FAI urges you to write your elected officials today. Millons of Americans–including 12 million food allergy sufferers–are counting on us.
Sincerely,
Mary Jane Marchisotto
Executive Director, FAI
Our Mission
FAI supports research to find a cure for life-threatening food allergies; clinical activities to improve diagnosis and treatment; public policy to increase federal funding for research and create safer environments for those afflicted; and educational programs to make the hospitality industry, schools, day care centers, and camps safer.
515 Madison Avenue, Suite 1912 | New York, NY 10022-5403
Phone: 855-FAI-9604 | Fax: 917-338-5130 | info Privacy Policy | Email Preferences
Worst resume ever? Perhaps. It’s pretty funny though… so maybe if the writer can harness the chaos, it can be put to good use. I wish I could take credit for writing or even finding this, but I can’t. It comes from a note posted on Facebook by my good friend Mike. I asked him if I could steal it to share with a wider audience, and he agreed that it’s too good to not be shared.
So, grab a cup of coffee, and pretend you’re looking to hire someone…
[Mike’s forward: This comes from my pal at a local coffee shop. This kid came in and insisted on including this resume with his application. I have not edited it for content, spelling or punctuation aside from anything containing his personal info. Have fun!!]
Resume of, AUTHOR.
Address: (Something, Pittsburgh PA 15219.)
Best way to contact: E-Mail.(email@college.edu.)
Attending college at: (College.)
Major of study: (Graphic Design, moving up to Game & Art Design.)
Degree earning: (Bachelor’s Degree, “4 years.”)
Years done so far out of 4: (almost a full 2 years total.)
Skill’s & Talent’s, which PERSON can bring to this job offer, is as followed:
I have both my Adobe & Microsoft skills.
I wield the knowledge & understanding on, how to properly function these programs.
I am computer smart & very good with organization.
I am a hard worker & I get stuff done right the first time around.
I am very well, at English & speaking.
I understand details very quickly & fluently as well.
I take direction extremely well & work as hard as I can, in order to guarantee success at whatever it is I am presently doing.
I am a team player & can be greatly independent upon my efforts put fourth in my work too.
I can give great advice to fellow students, if I do not know an answer to a question I will first try to see if I can figure it out, or guide them to the correct person in position to answer their questions.
I am passionate at everything I do, I never waste time I work first & leave the relaxing time for when it can be enjoyed without consequence.
Background & Job qualifications.
You are probably asking yourself:
“Why should I consider hiring, this college student?
What makes him, stand out more than any other college student. who may be applying?
Does he have the ambition & determination, to follow through with this job position?
Will he ever fail me, or let me down in anyway imaginable?
Can he be trusted & reliable, to do this type of work?
” These are all very good questions & I can inform security, that I can honestly answer them all, both correctly & factually, while backing up everything I am about to explain with evidence. ”
I feel you should consider my employment, cause I am a working type of person almost 95 percent of my time, my life is what I do, in this cause art & employment, I seem to never stop moving or working on something important, while others party with friends I am either figuring out life arrangements, school finances & study, or just creating neat art, cause that’s what I came to an art college for.
I believe what makes me stand out, is my never give up attitude, my spunky side which shines through as a bubbly personality, my humor can be a personality trait in particular settings, I naturally love people & always give my all & best to help them, I would give a homeless guy the remaining dollar in my wallet & I have done that a lot, so I just believe with every good employee, comes a caring strong individual. I am a determined student, with one option only, success. Failure is a given, but I never allow it, it will never be3 a option for me, if I want this dream career & lifestyle I have to want it, I have to live it & most importantly I have to fight for it full throttle. I brought my GPA up this quarter from a 1.7 now is at a peaking 2.4 /2.5 & there are still a few grades that need to placed in their, but I know how I did by communicating with my professors, it will at least be a 2.5 if anything. I can guarantee excellent & efficient work ethic, delivered daily without any questions ask. I am up for change, so if details in the work environment turn to the left or to the right I am on the ball & never respond negatively to a changed course or daily pattern. I am a Full-Time Student, at the COLLEGE, in the Graphic Design Program (Bachelors Degree.) I came for Game & art Design. though my art work from high school, passed in insanely well, my mathematics’ is what I am working on in order to move up & soon enough I will do just that.
Personal Cover Letter.
I am a very determined person. I believe in promotion, even where it seems, down right impossible. I believe anyone of us, can succeed at what we dream. It’s not where you come from, that makes who you are today, It is what you went through & how you handled it, in order to get to where you are today. I do not believe in using your pass negative experiences, as an alibi, nor do I agree with, failure being an option. I came from a rough life, beofre I became the young successful man I am today. I was the boy on the streets, the boy with no father or mother, nor anyone to love him. I came from Foster Cares, an endless amount & I went through life’s tragedies at an early age. Though my life was difficult, I still dreamed of a brighter tomorrow, with that said, I always said I BELIEVE. I never listened, when family & outsiders use to say, give up that’s a fairy tale dream-life it will never happened I still held my head high & believed, their must be more to this world Everyone can not simply be this horrid, their must be a better life, out there just waiting around the bend, sure enough after 17 to 18 years of my life, I found out that I was in fact very correct. There was a dream-life outside of tragedy & despair & that’s what I found today, for 2 years right out of high school I jumped on the college bandwagon & never stepped off since, still dealing with tragedies sure we always will, but I deal with them, get through them, the mature way, the professional way & I still do what my work & schooling expects of me.
I did have a part time job at the local Dunkin’ Donuts, but ran into, some scheduling details that weren’t that well explained in this case, every week was a new schedule & it began to confuse many employees working on the site. I worked as a very hard worker for a solid month, to the point that, the Assistant Manager taking over soon, said I wish I was in charge right now cause you would still be my employee, he apologized & said you the only one here who cleans, closes & runs this shop like a professional & to the book, like me, everyone else seems to slide on through & slack off, he said my apologize. This was very difficult it hurt very badly to where I cried a bit, I never been rejected in that fashion, so I think we all, get that wake up call, that proves to us even if your doing everything in your power to be the best employee, sometimes life still happens, all we can do is cry, move on & change for the better in the end I am also applying for 2 part times or one Full time position this quarter I have to find a place to live come September 1h & I expect to be okay, come fall something tells me I will. I guarantee, though I work part time, I will have more than enough time to work for you, this is without questioning, I would have never applied if I couldn’t bring the goods to the table, trust me. Many days I sit bored in a dorm silly, cause I don’t work that day or classes are finished, so I have all the time in the world I am a hard worker & I believe living life to it’s fullest, takes effort in order to receive it’s glory
Did he get the job? Please, share your thoughts! I’d also love to know how much of this was put through Google Translate. Think any of it was? I hope some of it was, anyway.
What’s your favorite line? There are so many good ones! This should replace the standard lourem ipsum.
World (and Lunar) Domination 